I'm pretty sure I have at least some aspects of genderfluidity in me. I'm still testing the waters, so to say. I want to be sure before coming out about it to more than my very close nonbinary friend. On the days I feel masculine, I get really nervous and uncomfortable wearing woman's clothes. As an assigned female, naturally almost all my clothes are female. Even when I wear men's clothes, there's still a lot of discomfort. I start to hate my breasts on those days, even if I loved them a few days before while I felt feminine. I was considering getting a binder, since I read that using other things could be dangerous. It's not so much that I'm disgusted with the fact my body is of a female, it's that when I feel masculine I really want to pass as a boy. It sometimes gets upsetting on my masculine days when I'm called by my female name or called a "her" because I want to pass as a boy. On those days I do have a solace though. In my robotic engineering class I am the only female. All the other students, and the teacher, all think of me as "one of the guys" which comes as a relief. They've taken to calling me by my last name or a nickname because it seems to make me more comfortable. One of them forgot I was a girl for a day and it made me so happy. Is what I'm feeling something that falls under dysphoria, or am I over-thinking things?
To me, it really sounds like dysphoria. I'm genderfluid, female by birth myself and that is basically how I feel when it hits me. Plus that I always get really sad that I'll never be able to have a boys body because then my feminine side would feel just as horrible. I've considered getting a binder too, but I'm not yet out to my family, that I live with, so it wouldn't go so well ordering it... Hope you'll find your way! >Peace
Would it be okay to PM you so we could talk more? I don't know any genderfluid people in person, and I think talking to you would be a great help.
For now you'll have to try wall messages, you can't PM until Full Member. Disappointing, but reasonable.
Yeah, it sounds like dysphoria to me. And maybe you can try to google for bigender. Wishing you all the best(*hug*)
So sorry I've been gone for a couple days. Lot's going on in my life at the moment. I had another question for you. Have any of you had fantasies of being the other sex at some points? It just seems weird to me when I do have those sorts of fantasies. Another thing I thought was worth mentioning was that I was talking to a friend during class about the haircut I want, and I mentioned how it would help with my gender identity if I'm genderfluid or whatever. So we did an experiment where I tucked all my hair under a hat and put on my oversized sweatshirt, and a freshman at my school actually mistook me for a boy! I was happy because it meant for me that I could actually pass. (my friend also said I made a cute boy)
That's totally fine. ^-^ Yes, I've had fantasies being the opposite sex a lot of times! I promise you, it's not weird and that a lot of people do it. I'm glad you have a friend to talk about this with. And I know, that feeling when you know you can pass is incredible!
I find it funny how my mom says I look like her but I've always thought I look more like my dad. Unfortunately, that helpful friend moved away today. I'll just have to deal with this on my own again. I'm not even out about my sexuality to my parents yet, so this whole situation is big and scary.
I have no idea how to make coming out easier for myself. I'm utterly confused at this point. I'm still trying to sort out my feelings. I'm glad I have this community though
This has been rough on my boyfriend, and I feel bad it's so tough for him. The weird thing is it's the label that scares him, nothing else.
I't because he has some serious mental problems from his parents divorce. His mom is trans, so his biggest fear was that I would end up being trans too, and he is having trouble with the label because it falls under the transgender spectrum. I'm trying to make this easier for him, but it's hard when he can't handle some of the concepts so readily, like me looking much more like a boy sometimes. It's weird, I know, but it makes sense to me.