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Is this actually how Gender Dysphoria feels?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Marss, Mar 27, 2020.

  1. Marss

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    Hi, thanks for clicking :slight_smile:

    Like everyone else on this thread I have been questioning seriously about my gender identity and I have slowly been coming to terms that I have / may actually been suffering from gender dysphoria for most of my adult life... [shit.]

    People describe gender dysphoria in many different ways so it’s hard to really know for myself and I’d really appreciate some insight.

    I’ve suffered a lot since puberty. Hated my breasts and curves and was freaked out about having a vagina. Socially, I hated being seen as a girl and would become very angry about it. Things got better later on for me once I started dressing more masculine and cut my hair short.

    To this day I am not comfortable with my breasts or curves, especially my naturally big ass. Ha.

    As for Relationships it doesn’t feel right at all to be seen as a girl romantically or sexually.

    I feel disconnected. However I don’t seem to mind my downstairs area anymore if I don’t see it as a vagina but just as a place to feel pleasure from.

    I like my light voice and certain feminine features, however I don’t personally feel at all female. just feminine.

    This is all very difficult to explain while trying to make this as short and to the point as possible. I’d really appreciate your answers and opinions. If you DON’T think this is gender dysphoria, please feel free to say so!

    Stay safe everyone. x
     
  2. Corax

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    I don't have a good answer. But I sympathize, I'm definitely in a similar boat.
     
  3. Marss

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    Thanks for reading, do you think what you have is dysphoria? (If it’s the same as mine)
     
  4. Corax

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    I'll be honest, I don't know. I feel like it is. But I live in an environment that doesn't really allow for self expression or experimentation, so it's never something I've been able to really poke at and think about beyond the hypothetical. I know I imagine I'd be happier if I wasn't stuck in the body that I have, or with the identity that I have. But I can't exactly test that theory.

    I feel like I'm either cis, and just super messed up and ace. Or I'm something on the trans spectrum and bi/pan something like that. Either way I'm confident I'm demiromantic, that's about all I'm sure about lol. It's hard to explain. And because I really don't have anyone to talk to about it, it's just sitting there gnawing at me and making me feel gross.
     
  5. Marble Jar

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    Hi Marss,
    It does sound like a form of dysphoria from what i've read online, but i think it will probably feel different for each individual. If taking steps to be more masculine made you feel better, then that makes sense to me. Plus you mention that it affects your feelings in relationships as well as your appearance.
     
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  6. Marss

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    You’re not messed up. x
     
  7. Marss

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    Very much so, it affects me in so many ways and is on my mind constantly when it comes to anything personal, like sex and relationships. However I wouldn’t feel completely right taking T. I like my feminine features, (light voice, softer skin etc) just not my ‘female features’ if that makes any sense at all x
     
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  8. Corax

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    I appreciate the sentiment. And apologize, I didn't mean to hijack your thread.
     
  9. Mihael

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    I guess that it can be called a kind of gender dysphoria if you felt unhappy dressing more feminine. And if you don’t like your feminine body features. If you don’t feel female. That’s a typical trans experience. However, you don’t have to be binary trans and you don’t have to take all the transition steps even if you are. Transition is about feeling at peace with yourself, comfortable, so no pressure :slight_smile:
     
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  10. Marss

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    Thank you!
     
  11. Marble Jar

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    Some men are beautiful in a more feminine way, but it doesn't mean they aren't seen as male or don't feel male. A lot of these things are defined by culture or fashion too. So if you like some of your feminine features i don't think you need to worry about it.
     
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  12. Marss

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    Thank you very much. Helps to hear that. x
     
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