met a girl. lives a few hours away. we meet up when im in the area. we enjoy each others company. we go our own ways in the morning. happened once, thought it was all dandy. nope. texting me saying she missed me. she wants a relationship ive said no and so we just carry on as we were. i miss her sometimes only the psychical side. emotionally im detached. bought her dinner once cuz she didnt have the money to cuz she doesnt have a job. its a regular-ish thing now. every week or so. (paying for her dinner when we see each other) running up my credit card on her. when i shouldnt. i was bored. i thought she was too cuz we were psychial straight away then left in the morning. it was fun but im getting in debt seeing her. so question: red flag even if we were to start a relationship perhaps? never says thanks. never holds doors when i have my hands full with stuff lol. shes cute and we get on just feel like shes a sponge. just venting i guess. i sound like an a$$ now ive written this all out. is talking directly and saying i think we are getting our wires crossed the way to go about it? i still wanna be mates, think she does too... i did try to think of her as a gf but no. i wouldnt mind too much if she had some manners. no one is perfect though i guess. she never says thanks. never pays for anything. well she got me a bottle of juice once. doesnt have a job even though she is looking. feels like she thinks im a money tree, (never directly asks but seems to just expect..) i think maybe thats why she might want to have a relationship? my come uppance i know. is she a sponge and am i an a$$? this has been going on for like 6 months now D:
Regardless of whether she's a sponge, if you can't afford to be buying her dinner, you sure as heck didn't ought to carry on!
You're not an ass. She may not be a sponge, but she definitely needs to learn some manners about who pays for dates. If she isn't footing an equal side of the bills, you need to bring it up with her. You don't have to tell her about it on a date because you still might end up paying if she doesn't have any money. You can just tell her via text or something - "Hey, awkward topic, but I don't think I can afford paying for our dates anymore. I've covered almost all of them. Can you cover the next one?" If she can cover it, awesome. If she can't, well then, no more dates for you two. This is a common issue, so no, you're not an ass. Don't let her drain your bank!
i think i just needed someone to tell me it was okay to bring up the subject of it, haha. thanks. its a hard thing to bring up though and i was goign to try when i see her again but i guess texting her would be a better option
