1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Is anyone else "bi" with an extreme prefference?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Mollyismyname, Jun 19, 2017.

  1. Mollyismyname

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    38
    Likes Received:
    12
    Location:
    Copenhagen
    I'm technically, in theory, by the word's definition, bisexual. I could have sex with a guy, and enjoy it. However, I have an extremely strong prefference for women. So strong that I just say I'm gay.

    If I could choose between an extremely attractive male and an below average female, I think would choose the male, and I would enjoy it. The same goes for romanticism/personality. However, average female over average male any day of the week. I could definately imagine not having sex with a guy ever, and I wouldn't feel like I've missed something. But I really can't imagine never having sex with a woman ever, that would be horrible. I can also much better imagine myself in a marriage/long term relationship with a woman. I could talk about attractive men without being bored, but would much prefer to talk about attractive women.

    In short, men vs women is a bit like broccoli vs oreos to me.

    Does anyone else feel this way?
     
  2. caustic

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2017
    Messages:
    99
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    Hell
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I used to feel that way, only the other way around. That was just after I figured out I was bi, though, and as time went on, it became more 50/50.
     
  3. Cinis

    Cinis Guest

    I used to feel exactly the same way. Now it's mostly: " meh. I don't really need/want a relationship in my life right now"
     
  4. Altruistic blue

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2017
    Messages:
    47
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    USA
    I relate to both of these
     
  5. Secrets5

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2015
    Messages:
    1,964
    Likes Received:
    77
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Not really. I notice I like more women than men, because I prefer femininity and more women are. But I prefer feminine men to feminine women.
     
  6. Senpai25

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2017
    Messages:
    162
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    Tennessee
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    My feelings have changed over time. I used to feel romantically attracted to just women and sexually attracted to both men and women. These days though, I feel it is 50/50 as a whole. I can easily see myself pursuing a relationship either way.
     
  7. Shorthaul

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2016
    Messages:
    1,498
    Likes Received:
    232
    Location:
    Idaho
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Not as drastic as broccoli or oeros... More like a white chocolate macadamia VS double chocolate chunk.

    I'm a solid 70% women 30% men kind of bi. Based mainly on the 10 person average people I find attractive in any given day. And yes I counted every day for a couple weeks to figure that out when I was talking with my therapist lol
     
    #7 Shorthaul, Jun 20, 2017
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2017
  8. Ruby Dragon

    Ruby Dragon Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 24, 2012
    Messages:
    478
    Likes Received:
    178
    Location:
    South Africa
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I have a strong preference for men over women, and many people think I'm straight because they've only ever seen me dating men. My parents and most of the other people in my life, know that I'm bisexual, though my mom is still a little bit sceptic. I'd say my preference is about 70/30 at this stage, but when I meet a nice woman, that preference is bound to change. I've dated women in the past, but never had sex with one, so I think my preference is sort of an automated response based on experience. I'm not very experienced in dating women. So yeah, that's about all there is to it really. Lol
     
  9. devotions

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2015
    Messages:
    46
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    Chicago
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Yup. I mean technically I'm bisexual, but I have gone years without feeling anything towards men. I always have been attracted to women, though, and because of that I strongly prefer to be in a relationship with a woman. It's nice to know there are other girls out there who feel similarly :slight_smile:
     
  10. Clinker

    Clinker Guest

    Though i consider my self bi, i tend to lean more toward men. Not sure why? Wheather it be something to do with general attitude, actions, looks, personality or of a more, lets say, big/little spoon desire?
    Id happily date women dispite my preference though.
    If were going off ratio and fraction id say im around M60:40F
     
  11. RainbowGreen

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2013
    Messages:
    1,442
    Likes Received:
    44
    Location:
    Québec
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I used to say I was bisexual, but I'm not even sure anymore. I don't really want to have sex with women and the only ''woman'' I remember being attracted to ended up being a trans guy. I kind of suspected he would be, and frankly this renders him more attractive to me.

    Honestly, I don't think I would last long in a relationship with a girl. I'm a person who doesn't like to express their emotions and even she didn't ask me to do it, I would probably need to deal with hers. I know not all girls are like that, but I'd prefer to stick with guys since I have more attraction towards them and compatibility with most of them.
     
  12. Humbly Me

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2017
    Messages:
    2,072
    Likes Received:
    311
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I feel kind of the same. I don't really like to express my emotions but I am very good at getting people to open up theirs to me. Apparently I am a perfect therapist of a friend because people love to talk to me about their problems for hours with me only having to even talk a small amount and give them a little advice. I feel more compatible with guys even though I can be attracted to girls to some extent I feel like I'm actually just imperfectly gay now. There are probably when girls I could be with forever and be perfectly happy, at least in theory, but I really doubt I will ever meet one. It's not like I don't find some females attractive but I just really don't feel motivated to be closer to them right now.

    I'd essentially say I'm gay but really would be willing to make exceptions... Aka just about Kinsey 5 and maybe this counts as bisexual? I don't know. Depends on your definition.
     
  13. DMode88

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2017
    Messages:
    21
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Peterborough UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I feel that way. I am definitely bisexual. People do say thing like "half gay" or "an arm and a leg out of the closet" which is annoying, but I cannot say for definite that I am unattracted to women.

    I do however find it a lot more awkward and a lot more difficult to fall in love with a woman - whereas it feels totally natural and exciting to feel the same way if not more so towards a man. Also, being sexy and expressing my desires is totally awkward with a woman, but I feel sexy as hell when I do it with a man.

    I do ask myself if I should just come out as gay, but I know in my heart that I am not.
     
  14. BothWaysSecret

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 28, 2017
    Messages:
    1,916
    Likes Received:
    136
    Location:
    Philadelphia
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I suppose I have a preference, even though I never really thought about it much. I'm heteroromantic bisexual, so I have a stronger preference for women.
     
  15. Landon

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    18
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Unicorn
    I FEEL THE EXACT SAME WAY!
    but I'm pansexual, I would rather date women, be with a woman, and value women. Any other gender besides men, although i am attracted to them and MIGHT date them lol
     
  16. gravechild

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2013
    Messages:
    3,425
    Likes Received:
    110
    Gender:
    Androgyne
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I have a preference for hot people.
     
  17. BothWaysSecret

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 28, 2017
    Messages:
    1,916
    Likes Received:
    136
    Location:
    Philadelphia
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Don't we all?
     
  18. Morri

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2017
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wonderland
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    This might be me, I don't know. I really can't tell if I'm a bi woman with a strong preference for women, or a flexible lesbian, or a "true" lesbian. I could describe myself as "almost lesbian" or "barely bisexual".
     
  19. Mollyismyname

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    38
    Likes Received:
    12
    Location:
    Copenhagen
    OMG the akward part. I relate so much. Being romantic with a guy, snuggling and watching a movie, holding hands while looking at the sunset -it seems soooo akward to me and almost uncomfortable. With a woman? Hell yeah! The same goes for sex...

    But like you, I just cannot say I'm unnattracted to men. I find many men very beautiful (women more so, but still) and there have been times in my life where I've almost exclusively fantasized about men sexually. There's also been times where I've only fantasized about women, and those have been longer than the ones with men, but... Yeah. I know in my heart that I have brief cases of opposite-sex attraction. It's almost annoying. I wish it could go away, actually. I really wish I was one of those gay folks who just "always knew" and never needed to question anything.

    Although I on a "lust-level" have the ability to be attracted to men, I just don't really... want to have anything with them. I can't really describe it.
     
    #19 Mollyismyname, Jun 22, 2017
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2017
  20. LostInDaydreams

    Moderator Full Member

    Joined:
    May 10, 2016
    Messages:
    4,300
    Likes Received:
    2,096
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    This is a really interesting thread.

    I sometimes wonder if bi with an extreme preference would be the best description of my sexuality.

    At the moment I'm in a long-term relationship with a member of the opposite-sex. Our relationship hasn't been great for a few years, so I've been fantasizing about women, imaging myself in a relationship with a woman, etc. However, if I were single, I'm not sure how I would feel and if I could completely rule men out. The prospect of a relationship with another man doesn't really appeal at the moment, it seems quite boring, but I don't know how much of that is my current situation.

    Good to know that other people feel similarly.