I'm worthless.

Hi,

Why would you be attention seeking?! I as a random person on the internet care for you even though I do not know you. Why? Because you are worth more than you think!

I am 22 years old now, and also have no idea about whether I am gay/straight/bi/whatever, and that would make anyone insecure.
When I was younger, around your age (if 14 is correct), I was actually also rather depressed. Never so bad that I hurt myself, but I thought about ways how to kill myself in a rather rational way. I never did anything, and I'm glad I didn't. I'm also not a handsome guy, and have accepted that long ago. I'm not super smart, and don't have a talent as far as I know, and yet I am happy.
I must confess that I've always had a lot of friends, but that's all about how you feel as a person. If you become happier about how you feel that will reflect on your surrounding.
You just have to take one step at a time!

Just think about it this way. You live in a country with no war, in a time where such a thing seems almost impossible. You are 14 years old, and still have a lot of changes to go through in life. For instance, you'll get to meet awesome friends in the future, go to university (if you want), or else find a job that you want to do. Nobody should force you to do what you don't want to, and you are not like your family! You can be whatever you want if you believe that you can.
This all sounds very bull-shitty, but anything positive has to come from you! Whether anything I just mentioned above will happen is just a guess, but wouldn't you rather believe in a positive dream than a negative one? They have an even chance of succes as long as they haven't occurred.

I just divide my time between doing things that I have to do, and doing things that I want to do, which keeps me happy. Who knows what the future will bring, just take things one step at a time, and be selfish, make yourself happy.

Also, I don't mind if you totally dissagree with what I just wrote above, say whatever you want to say, maybe it will help.

 

Actually, you don't know. You simply want to assume that. But more on that later.

What do looks really have to do with anything? Just because Jersey Shore and Fox News say you have to look good doesn't really mean you can't benefit the human race at all. There have been many people who aren't that great-looking and still have inspired many, many people. (See: George Lucas, John Lasseter, Walter Murch, Kurt Cobain)

Does it matter? Seriously, does it really matter? You're 14, not even old enough to have a job yet.

(See: Kurt. Cobain.)

People can change, man. Even you can. Yeah, that's right. You can change. I was a total asshole in my first 3 years of High school. I was even homophobic, then. If someone saw me now, they'd probably think I was the gayest person on Earth.

Perhaps you haven't completely found yours, yet? I'm sure everyone's got their talents. Look at your parents. What do they do? Are they good with numbers? Are they artistic? Can they handle money well? No matter what, you'll find something that suits you. Again, you're 14. You're not even old enough to have a job. What High school (what any school really) has to offer is a very limited amount of places to find your talents. Find a hobby. Do you love doing it? Do you grow a passion for it? If so, make that your career. You'll be much more motivated to go to work in the future. I'm an editor. A video editor. What High school class supports something as ambiguous as that?

Kewl! You like something about yourself, and I'm pretty sure your eyes look awesome, too.

I dunno, can you see very well? If so, you're probably great for things like color correction, or if you have 20/20 vision, you might be an amazing fighter pilot. Eyes are great for many things. You can see with 'em.

Okay, cool. You realize there's a growing population of support for LGBT members, right? And it's growing FAST. But with that aside, who really cares? What does your sexuality have anything to do with what you contribute to the human race as a whole? The bag of benefits to society really is a mixed bag of treats. There's LGBT members, straight members, drunk members, high members, etc. There's so much that's helped people without even looking twice at someone's sexual orientation.

Sorry man, but if your dick says "I like guys" then that's the case. But again, look at the above posts. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with your overall personality or who you are as a person.

You're 14, man. Seems a bit too early to just give up on life. You've got a whole 70 some-odd years ahead of you. There's bound to be something for you within those years.

Or work your way up the ladder from the bottom. That's the case with E VERY BODY. My father was born and raised in Harvard, Illinois, a town not even as big as Disneyland where it's all almost barren farmland and old people. He just bought an airplane a few weeks ago and flew 4 members of his family TO Disneyworld and flew all 6 members FROM Disneyworld last week. Oh yeah, we also had a day at Universal Studios. So really, it doesn't matter that much where you start off in life. It's more of a case of where you're guiding it, and it sounds like you want to do better than your family. I've heard many success stories based off of that kind of attitude.

You're not OLD enough to get a job. You're 14 years old. You gotta be 16 for very small job and 18 for others, like being a cashier. It's all legal stuff, dude. Has nothing against you or anything. Has everything to do with the 20s/30s and kids losing limbs and fingers in factory equipment.

Look. you're 14. You have NO idea what's in store in the future. You really don't. I'm not saying "oh you're stupid for not knowing the future," I mean.. Nobody knows what the future holds. Nobody can predict the future.

I went through the same crap you did. Gender dysphoria, sexual orientation confusion, self-harm, all of that. I also thought the same shit you are now. "Oh, I'm never going to have a good job, family, etc" Well a couple days ago, I learned that in a set of great circumstances, I'll end up working for Cartoon Network. Something I can only dream of. If I killed myself when I was 14, I wouldn't have heard that at all. Just keep pushing through the years, and you might even end up finding yourself in a much better position than the previous year, or month, or day, whatever.

 

This is a LGBT site in the UK

LGBT History Month - Claiming our history, Celebrating our past, Creating our future

 

Okay, I just saw you live in the UK, and I assumed you were in the US. I sincerely apologize for that.

But after a bit of research, my points still stand. You gotta be 16 for a full-time job. No job at the age of 14 is necessarily great, since it's a part-time job. It's the grunt work, the stuff nobody really wants to do, but it has to get done, anyway. I mean, if it weren't, we'd all be living in a land of filth, and we don't want that over having to do grunt work.

But still, you're 14 so there's a lot ahead of you you don't know about. Chances are, it's better than you think. And also, find something you love to do and make a career out of it. You'll be doing work for fun.

 

You are most welcome! Most people here know what you are going through to some extent, especially on the 'feelings' part! I just went to a gay cafe in my city, which was still empty at this hour except for the barman, and spent an hour talking to him about my doubts! I don't even know the guy!
You just have to keep talking to people, and believe in balance. You are feeling really down right now, but things change! I really started to believe that, and it seems to be working for me so far.
Stuff like being gay, losing hair (me at 18), and not looking like you want to happens to a lot of people. With my looks I decided I would just say f... it, I am who I am, and people will like me for who I am. If they don't then they are not worth it anyway. I wish I could say I was already that sure about being gay, but alas...

Anyway, just keep doing stuff you like doing, and the rest will come.

 

In addition to all the positive thinking put forth already, my advice to people who honestly feel that their life is not worth living, and would rather hurt or kill themselves is to instead dedicate your life to things outside yourself. Action to me is a cure for depression. At 14 its a little more difficult because of school and age restrictions for work and volunteer opportunities, but you could also try to find out if there are any opportunities in your community where you could lend a hand. Even if you think you are going into it with no skills, those skills can be taught and learned through experience.

I can only speak from my own experiences, I grew up in a home where my parents and siblings all did regular volunteer work. For me, I have spent a lot of time working with mentally and physically disabled children, and that work has humbled me and empowered me.

Its not about finding people who may or may not have it worse than you to make you feel better about your own troubles, its about looking outside of your own point of view and realizing that you are just a tiny part of the whole. That may sound depressing, but I think that idea that we are all interconnected and even though we all are not destined to be rich, famous, stylish, powerful people, we all can have a positive effect on the people around us and our immediate surroundings.

When you can step out of your own mind and your own worries and be able to help, entertain, comfort, listen to, or anything else with another person, you can gain strength from that experience. You may not feel accepted or important in the spot youre in now, but I can tell you that there are many different sorts of organizations and people across the world who could use some help.

Of course at 14, I hope you can find some peace in knowing that as you grow older you change, and your mind frame and values and priorities change. I hope that you will be able to see all the great possibilities your life holds for you. In the worst case if you cant see anything about your life that is worth living, then before throwing it away, at least try to use it to benefit others. But for now, please just try to be strong. Teenage years are tough and confusing. But those struggles, as cheesy as it sounds, are what shapes us. With the right attitude, they are also what causes us to grow and find value in ourselves.

 

You need to find someone you can talk to. Until you have an optimistic mindset, dont read too far into yourself, b/c you will dig yourself into these holes. Just be yourself, and live life. If something interests you, jump at it. You will never know what fulfills you as a person until you've applied yourself. Get into extracurricular activities.

If all else fails, come post your problems here and get sound advice.

 

Hey, no problem. Lately, I've begun to develop a more objective mindset, and it's really helped me in many ways. For seeing things as they really are, it's something that's put me in a much better mood and I've become much more optimistic about things. Everything I said is based off of this:

We as imperfect humans living in a 3-dimensional world will always have something that we don't know about, and that's always what the future holds. We can say, "this MIGHT be in the future" but we can't say exactly when, and we really can't say if it will happen, either. Do you know what the next page you're going to open up when you add a new tab to your browser? You can guess as good as possible, and you can plan as accurately as you can, but perhaps you'll get distracted by something. Perhaps someone will message you in another tab and you'll go to that instead.

It tickles people like me to go thinking that there will always be something we don't know. That means that there's always something to explore or find out.

 

First of all start respecting your sexuality. unless you don't accept and respect your sexuality, you'll feel worthless.

Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder. trust me I have fallen for a guy who does not look good to others but to me he is the hottest person on earth (though its different thing that he turned out to be straight). that's the power of love and one day you too will find someone who will love you for what you are. love is beyond physical appearance

and I envy you for being born in such an open society. You don't realize what you have. I am from India and you have no idea how difficult it is to be a gay here. you should thank god that you are born in accepting and tolerating society. things are much easier for you than 95 percent of the gay people all around the world.

just see the positive aspects of life. You have so much to look forward to. just be proud of yourself, your sexuality and as time comes someone will be there just for you.

 

I am glad you are feeling beter! When I was your age I was the my life was the exact oppisite of yours except the gay thing and felt just as bad as you were feeling. One day when I was 12 or 13 I was told to search deep in my heart and look for my hearts desire. I did and I knew what I was born to be in short order. So I set goals and met them over a few years. Then when I finished high school I was ready for it (as I could be without real-life experience). Then I jumped right in and winged it until I had it down pat. Well I am 40 now and living the life I wanted back then with the exception of having kids(which is impossable in this male body). I even have a man who accepts my body more than I do. So there will be someone out there for you too! June