I'M SO SCARED!!! Also, I want to be a woman! who agrees?

Ooo boi (gurl), the first paragraph is just like reading my thoughts right now. But what I'm working toward right now is budgeting my money to get an apartment so I can have my boyfriend over whenever and then getting out of college and then coming out (so they can't kick me out nor can they cut me off)

So I'm just commenting so I can get notifications.

 

You know some times you can't change people. Your parents might come around, they might not. But it sounds like you've found an awesome guy. If you can keep your relationship strong, maybe you can both get jobs and move out together some day? A lot of things in life get better once you can make your own decisions. Does he know you want to be a girl?

You absolutely can be a girl on the outside if you want to be. There are some things like what you mentioned you won't get to experience, the periods and being a mom. Some people that were born girls miss out on those things too. Like if a woman has to have a hysterectomy. Or a job that prevents her from being able to raise a kid. But the lines between the sexes aren't as hard and fast as most people would like to believe.

It sounds like the biggest problem you're having is living without fear. Well... you can't really. But the cool thing I've found is that when you're yourself, and you're comfortable and confident, it makes other people feel better about being themselves and more comfortable being around you. And that gets rid of a lot of the fear.

One trick I use is, I just flat out ask myself, "ok. If I just go ahead and do this, what will actually happen". And my mind will come up with all sorts of crap. And then I'll just, say, grab some 12 wides and put them on the ground and try them on. And none of those things I was scared of happen.

Yeah I'll get stares some times. Guys are the worst at policing behavior I hate to say it. But I mean who cares.

And every now and then I'll feel uncomfortable, like I'll go into a department store where all the racks are chest high so you can see the whole store from everywhere, and the store is packed with older judgemental looking women, miss grundy types. And I hate to say it but I'll just chicken out. Nothing wrong with that, it just means I go shopping a different day.

But other times I'll just push past that part of me that wants to run the other direction and almost every time, nothing happens. I've walked past people, top to bottom a woman, that were getting off the bus, and they just ignored me and went home before. And when I have other people with me it becomes easier.

So I mean I guess what I'm saying is, you don't really need your parents to approve of you being a girl or having a boyfriend. I mean it sucks. But one day you're going to want to be independent anyway. You can still focus on the good with them and honor them, maybe make them proud of what you do for a living, they just aren't capable of understanding this one thing about you is all.

Good luck sis

 

well i am a male, i love to be a woman, but i cant be one, so i cross dress and behave like her. also i am bisexual, hence i can experience both men and women, but deep inside i b ehave like a male

 

(*hug*)it's ok hon! you said you were over 20? if you are your parents have no say in whether you see your boy friend or not. i do suggest waiting to come out until you may not depend on your parents if you live w\ them. oh, and i'm not trans, but i do think of myself as an androgynous gender who is sexually attracted to women. physically, i like to look like a good balance between male and female.

 

I'm still trying to get over my fear about it. My Dad accepts me but my Mom will need time to come around. Then there is the question of my brother, sister, in-laws and nieces.. I am scared out of my mind too. But I have to believe that I am this way for a reason, and if there is a god he will love me anyways and help me through it.

 

Unfortunately you're never going to have a period or bear children. You can totally change your body though and live life as a woman if that's what you need to be happy. Check out tsroadmap.com, it has a lot of really helpful resources for people looking to transition.