idea for coming out to parents.

Hang in there. You did an exceptionally brave thing (something I can't do and I'm almost twice your age) and I expect you'll be much better off in the long run. If he didn't say anything to you in front of your friend I find it hard to believe he'll have an overwhelmingly negative reaction.

 

Do it. You don't want to continue stressing over it.

 

Yeah, I think this is probably a good idea. Whether positive or negative I would have definitely expected some sort of a reaction by now so maybe something happened and he never saw it.

 

It seems like this conversation will end up happening in person. I know that's not what you wanted and it will certainly be nerve-racking, but I think it will go okay for you. I think starting the conversation is by far the scariest part and by writing the letter you've pushed that on your dad to do. Hang in there; you did the right thing.

 

I don't think this is something that he'll just forget easily. I would start by just allowing yourself to be alone with him for more than a few seconds and actually pay attention to him. It's pretty obvious he was trying to talk to you about this yesterday before your friend came over.

 

Why is that a bad thing?

If you get him to start a conversation and immediately burst into tears and cry for hours in a ball, you will still have done something to be proud of.

 

Stop filling in other peoples' reactions for them; let life play out. You won't be able to avoid pain by anticipating everything other people will do around you.

Your parents love you and they see that you are pushing them away; maybe they are feeling hurt right now, and at a loss as to where to begin. They are probably concerned for you.

Don't assume the worst, eventually you will have to engage with your parents in person and they are unpredictable, as all people are. They may end up pleasantly surprising you. Best case scenario you will stop feeling isolated from your parents! Good luck.

 

I know this isn't easy but I think the way your dad is handling this is great. He's showing concern without jumping to any conclusions or reacting harshly or anything like that and is giving you the opportunity to communicate with him in the way that you're most comfortable. I'm sure you're still really stressed about this but I have a feeling in the not-too-distant future you'll look at this as an extremely positive step.

 

That's awesome. Your dad sounds like a good guy.

 

First of all it sounds like your dad is awesome, loves you and wants to help you. I know its hard to come out, but as a guy its especially harder to come out to your dad. I know it can be awkward talking about sexuality, and feelings to parents but trust me, if they love and support you it is a big help.

I was depressed before I came out to my parents, so much so I did land in a psych unit. It was during my time there that I realized that as much as I never wanted to come out to my parents I had to in order for me to not be depressed. As for the cutting, try wearing a rubberband around your wrist and just snap it whenever you feel like cutting, or ive been told that getting some sandpaper and a piece of wood and just sanding can help let out some agression.

As nerve racking as it is talk to your parents, talk to a therapist face to face. If they can see your emotion and be honest with them they should be willing to help you. As someone who is very independent as I am it was difficult for me to do but it will help you feel less depressed and people will understand with whats bothering you

 

I think this says a lot about your dad.


If you could just force yourself to talk to him, it would go a long way in helping him help you. But at least you know that he knows, and that he's willing to help.