I hate myself quite a lot for a lot of different things and I know that its not good for me but I don't know how to stop. I tried reminding myself of the things I like about myself but there are always more things that I dislike about myself than what I like and that just makes it worse. I especially have this about my fencing (for those who don't know, its an Olympic swordfighting sport). I really want to do well at it but I'm not that good and I hate it when I get something wrong and now I put myself on an extra training programme but sometimes I don't stick to it and that then makes me feel even worse when I struggle in my class. I have also been hurting myself when I feel like that not anything drastic but I punch myself or a wall or something to punish myself. I know it won't help me get better at it by beating myself up and my coach has also told me that a few times but I don't know how to stop. I want to get it right so badly and I get so frustrated with myself when I don't. It's not just fencing its a few other things as well. The other thing I really hate about myself is that I cannot control my emotions and I cry far too often when I get angry or sad or whatever and I don't want to be like that! I try so hard but it always spills out. I know that its not good for me to feel like this but I also don't just want to except things the way they are. I'm sorry for the length of the post and for if I sound silly and petty which I probably do but I would be glad of any advice on this matter. Thanks.