I am wondering if anyone else dreads nights and weekends. For me I have a lot of issues at night time and on the weekends. My dysphoria gets to me, I get a general feeling of loneliness and I start to think about my friend/co worker (who is Trans*) whom I have a crush on. I don't know what to do. Usually at night I end up going out, just to get out of the house to be by myself so I go to malls, but I want to hang with my friend but every time I ask its always sorry I am busy or I have to deal with my gf, etc. And I know that its selfish, but he is my only friend here. I have tried making other friends but I always get weird looks, people shake their head at me, etc. So yeah, just wondering if anyone else gets like this.
Hey there, yeah, I got the hang of what you feel like. I always feel lonely at home although there are 5 ppl around. I just don't feel... like sharing a lot with them. I even started disliking their company and I only lately made friends I could trust enough to stay the weekends over at their home (why that is so you may find out on EC eventually). Making friends is actually what I wanted to suggest. You may want to try finding "non-straight-friends" because it's only the person that matters there (imho). Maybe even chatting with them will be fine for a start. Another thing is to join a club. Sports, literature, whatever you feel like. There you'll meet ppl whom you share interests with. I hope it will work out for you soon. Lonelyness sucks... a lot. (*hug*)(*hug*)
You sound like you might have a crush on this guy a little. Anyway, what you describe with the nights and weekends feels to me like a lack of momentum. That is, you can get going during the day's activities but at other times your life just seems to wind down and stop. I'm guessing you are the introspective type and tend to draw from other peoples enthusiasm. If that's true you should look for people to hang with that have a positive outlook on life. A great place to meet people like this is at community based organizations so I suggest starting there with a little volunteer work. See how it goes.
