I generally feel that I am a lesbian after recently tossing aside my "bi phase". The problem is that I am slightly attracyed to some men, although I would never have sex with them, and although the thought isn't gross, I can't imagine so much as kissing a guy, where as just the thought of a girls skin drives me crazy with lust. And I know that there is a diffrent between "attracted" and "sexually attracted" but what worries me is that when I see long haired guys it sometimes makes my heart flutter or tighten a bit. I have been scared to come out as a lesbian because I don't want to be that girl who says I'm a lesbian but will end up screwing a guy a couple years down the line. I also need a label, as much as I've tried to convince myself I don't need one.
Hey, I can relate to uncertainty. The thought of me being with a guy (especially a long-haired one) is super exciting, but there are lots of girls that I don't really want to have sex with but do excite me. I know we're coming from different directions but your post struck a chord within me. I really want to put myself into a firm category, or label as you say, then I could just relax and pursue my life with confidence. Somebody told me recently that maybe I don't have to make any decisions, just take life as it comes and roll with it. It really, really does not matter what anybody thinks! Everyone really just cares about themselves and are not concerned with your actions or reputation. It doesn't pay to live your life according to other's expectations. It doesn't matter if they think that you're one of "those" girls. You do what makes you happy! I hope this helps. Much love!
I totally know what you mean. I used to identify as bisexual when I was still figuring things out because I thought I was attracted to dudes as much as I am girls (lol, I wasn't. Compulsory heterosexuality sucks, yo). I too sometimes find men attractive but it's usually more of an aesthetic attraction, rather than a sexual one. I don't want to have sex with or kiss a dude. Only girls. I also consider myself somewhere around a 5.5 on the Kinsey scale. I think you should picture who you can imagine yourself in a long term relationship with and who you can see yourself marrying. Is it a man or a woman? For me, it's a woman so I identify as a lesbian. Labels can be nice to have. They give us a sense of belonging and like we fit in with a group. But don't forget that you can always change that label later down the line if you find it no longer applies to you. That's what I did and nobody really cared. Don't worry about it too much.
