I'm sorry Mom, I'm sorry Dad. I'm sorry Sis for the freak you think I am. I sorry brother but it's you who pushed me away and now I'm alone and I need a shoulder to lean on. I've always known I was different. I accepted who I was a long time ago. I've always liked guys and it was two years back when I accepted I like girls too. I was thought I was weird because I liked both genders, I never knew there was the term 'bisexual.' When I first saw the term, I knew it was me in some weird kind of way. I was happy to know that I wasn't really alone but I hid it and as I accepted that I also had to accept the fact that I didn't like my body. I wanted a flat chest and short hair and I felt like a guy. I liked and still do everything 'guyish.' I convinced myself I didn't find guys attractive, I was ready for T but there was the hurdle of my parents I was never going to pass. They saw my past search history...Oops. And started asking all the questions...I broke down and cried for a whole day. But I think it was for the best because I am not trans I am bi or something like it. Like right now I don't necessarily feel like a girl but I don't feel like a guy. I want a flat chest and short hair but I don't want to be considered a guy. I don't want to be considered a girl. I don't want to be handsome, I don't want to be pretty. I'm kind of confused....like I just want to have a flatter if not completed flat chest wear guyish top and jeans and colors and have short hair but not necessarily be called a guy. Does anyone else feel the way or am I alone? ---------- Post added 9th Jul 2015 at 02:00 AM ---------- Also when my mom and dad found out they kind of both went different ways on it. My dad was just like "I love you no matter what." But my mom on the other hand yelled a screamed and said that God made me, me and that it wouldn't be right to change it. I don't blame her but I feel she added to my thinking because I wanted a pair of basketball shorts and she started calling me guy and asking me if I was gay and I think that it really made me think about myself and how I felt.
I used to feel that way but I am now convinced I am trans F-M and I like females. I can assure you that you're not alone. Just think about it a little longer before you decide 100%.