How to handle lesbian parents?

Research would back you up on this. Most studies have found that children raised by same-sex couples have the same frequency of hetersexuality as children raised by heterosexual couples. See this study for example:

http://www.cyriltarquinio.com/app/download/5796122297/Patterson+1992.pdf

 

Don't be silly! There are loads of awful straight parents out there too.

The best advice I think I've ever seen about parenting is to BE the person you want you child to be. If you have hangups, or internalised shame - so will your kids.

Be comfortable with your own body, personality & relationships, and your kids will learn to do the same.

 

That's so nice to hear, wishing you much continued success in the future!!!

Of course you don't hate your parents. They made what they thought was the best choice for you and your family at the time, and while they may have missed the target by a bit, they clearly love you and I'm sure they are so proud of you.

 

Not everything a research says is 'true'...just pointing out that cause that really urks me as someone who has worked in research.

There is a lot of conflicting research regarding sexuality, the 'truth' right now is that sexuality is not well understood, the end.

 

You might want to sit down and talk with your parents about the whole not inviting them to school thing. That it's because of the homophobic attitude at your school, and not because you don't want them there. Be careful to not make one of them feel less like on of your parents because of this. ( It can be pretty hard raising a child as a non-biological mother )

I wish I could help you out more, but I went to schools were everyone was fine with me having two mothers. So I can't really talk about that.

Make sure you do invite the friends that do accept it to your house, make sure you have people to talk to. Do not carry this on your own. There is no shame in asking people to help you by talking to you! Talking truly helps.

Accept that it hurts your mothers when you hide their sexuality and/or the fact that you have two, talk with them about this. Let them know you're not ashamed, but you're in a difficult situation because of other people in your school.

And you're not alone, remember that. There are many of us living with two moms. And to be honest i wouldn't have it any other way, I hope you don't either.

If you ever want to talk to someone about having two mothers, how I act around people that don't know about them or something else. Don't be afraid to send me a message, thats what we're here for!

 

I used to think I wouldn't have friends cause of that

 

I'm going to give you my opinion from a parent's point of view. Your mothers loves you very much and there is nothing more important in the world than the feelings and well-being of their children. This is a lesson I wish I had learned at a younger age, before I became a parent, so that I could have been closer to my mom. The most important thing you could do with your moms is communicate. You might think that you are "sparing their feelings" by not telling them how you feel and your worries, but you're actually hurting them by not being honest.

Just tell them everything you have just told us. They are adults, and they have been teens before, they know the angst but are mature to the point where they can understand those feelings now. They know that other kids aren't kind or understanding, but they have lived longer than you and can help you cope with that.

Don't let your worry of what others in your school might think ruin possible memories with your parents. Let them come to school with you. Let them volunteer. Maybe seeing their loving and caring relationship with you and each other will help them become more accepting! Not all of them will agree (as you know), but your moms know how to deal with that when it comes. They will help you deal with any negativity.

At your age, it's typical for a child to push their parents away no matter what. When I was your age (oh god, that line made me feel old) my mom and I were in a heated argument and she said "If we were in the animal kingdom, I would have eaten you when you were born!" Now it's a running joke between us, but at the time I was appalled that she could say that!

Things always seem worse now than they will later. Growing up is tough in itself, relationships with parents are hard, but don't add to the stress of growing up by worrying what your peers in high school think. (And to be honest, five years from now, you'll barely remember them. I promise.)

 

Your school is probably not really homophobic, but school can be a rough time for people involved with LGBT in any particular way. But, very quickly people will mature.
You shouldn't be embarrassed by it at all, if people ask, just tell them like it's no big deal (which it isn't).
Also remember that you have two loving parents, which is more than some of people have!

You also have to realise that questions aren't necessarily a bad thing. People tend to be unaware of things and by asking, they're trying to get a better understanding, not trying to make anyone uncomfortable.