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How much training is necessary for bottoming?

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by Nightdream, Jan 17, 2024.

  1. Nightdream

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    Asking mostly because I still struggle with self penetration by myself and I have been using butt plugs as a way to get used to the sensations. Does it vary a lot or is there a common time for a person to be ready?
     
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  2. Mlh88

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    I can only speak for my own experience, it was something I had wanted to do for a while, and I bought some butt plugs several months ago to start preparing myself too. Was able to work my way up to the largest plug decently fast, I’d say I used the plugs maybe 10-15 times total before finally bottoming, but I’m sure it’s different for everyone. I personally think a penis is much easier to take and more comfortable than a plug, as long as you have a partner you can communicate with. It shouldn’t hurt, so if you feel any sort of pain, have him pull out and put on more lube and start over. Cannot stress how important the lube is, however much you think you need, you need more lol. For me, as much as I enjoyed the plugs, bottoming for real was mind blowing, easily the best sexual pleasure I’ve ever had. Have fun and good luck!
     
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  3. Sammy1995

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    Yeah it's worth shelling out on lube and being liberal with it's application or reapplying as needed. Good luck though, it's definitely a lot of fun.
     
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  4. tearingtherose

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    My first experience was when I was 14. No prior training and no lube, and with a lot of talking and relaxing he gradually managed to get his penis in. That you've already been practicing will be a huge help. The first few times may well be more uncomfortable than pleasurable, but with time it will become hugely pleasurable. Just don't suffer in silence, if it hurts tell him to stop, wait for the sensation to pass, and slowly start over. I'm sure you'll enjoy it as much as we do!
     
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  5. JT1999

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    Your username now makes a whole lot of sense!
     
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  6. tearingtherose

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    That's one way of looking at it! Heck, it was the 90s, we didn't have the internet and we just tried things out! I can remember that we used to put our penises between our bum cheeks and thrusted as we thought that's how you do it. In a Grade 9 sex ed class, we were told about anal sex and that night after school we put our new education to use.

    There is a long story behind the meaning of the name but I've moved it to a new thread as I was worried I was hijacking this one.
     
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  7. Jakebusman

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    How many times to start over till the pain turns to pleasure ?
     
  8. tearingtherose

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    Difficult to say with any certainty as it was nearly 30 years ago, but I know we liked our first experience enough that we repeated it many times. We took it in turns as top and bottom and would be both each session.

    I know we took it steady. There was a lot of resistance, hardly surprising, so as the top we applied a bit of pressure and as the bottom we tried to relax as best we could given mild discomfort and excitement. As two hormonal teenage boys, maintaining erections wasn't an issue.

    If there was pain, rather than discomfort, we'd stop and wait. We didn't pull out, or change position or anything, we simply froze in place. When the bottom was comfortable again, he'd give permission to resume pushing. Sometimes the bottom would just be too uncomfortable, so we'd abort and either take a break or switch around.

    Aside from our stubborn determination to do this because we had learned it was possible, I do recall that once penetration was achieved, there would rarely be any discomfort as the top slowly started to thrust and gradually increased the pace.

    We "practiced" regularly, almost every night after school. It certainly became easier to achieve penetration over time and eventually I could be penetrated with no discomfort and little resistance, maybe it was after a few months?

    From a tops perspective with vaginal sex and my girlfriend a year or two later, it wasn't that much different. Her first penetration was painful (queue the PULP lyric, "Do you remember the first time? I can't remember a worse time"), which I believe is common because of the hymen. The next few times there was discomfort and penetration was slow but naturally lubricated. Eventually, she had no trouble the same as I didn't as a bottom.

    I have always treasured the first time with a man. I walked home from my friend's house, probably with a stupid grin on my face, just in disbelief and awe that his cum was inside me. I also knew I wanted that to happen again so despite the lack of lube and preparation, it worked and we enjoyed it. I don't really recall the first time with a woman, I do remember where but not so much the experience.

    With memories like these, how did I ever manage to convince myself that I was straight and not gay?!?
     
    #8 tearingtherose, Jan 22, 2024
    Last edited: Jan 22, 2024
  9. JT1999

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    First time memories are a funny thing, I think you can look back on them differently after the event. Sex with my first boyfriend when I was 16 was dissappointing - not as much at the time but massively dissappointing in retrospect. He wasn't much into foreplay, he liked getting head but didn't return the favour. Sex never got me anywhere close. Sometimes it was quick, other times it went on for a while but it didn't really matter. I still enjoyed it, but I think I was just enjoying the fact I was having sex. Then the first few experiences with another girl, not long before my 17th birthday, they were the exact opposite. She was careful and attentive and got a lot of pleasure from pleasuring me, and vice versa. I really got into that! After her, I was hooked on girls and could have sworn off men for life. I'd slept with a few more girls by the time I met my now-fiance and I loved everything about it. But I'm not sure what it was about him that had me hooked from day one. It was quite a while until we slept together, but I remember afterwards thinking "OK, so this is what it's all about". He was really good, obviously very experienced as he's 10 years older than me. He got me off 2 or 3 times before penetration and I don't know if I'm similar to most women or not, but once I'm in that state it doesn't take a lot to get me over the edge again. I still think about that first time a lot, it was incredible and him being so much bigger than me was something I really liked. I definitely had jelly legs!

    Anyway, I think this meme sums up my sexuality today!

    [​IMG]
     
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  10. Cinnamoon

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    It depends, for me certain products help but it takes me some time to warm up. I've never really been one for a quickie.
     
  11. Necrose

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    I can't say for sure. My experience has been with toys and a lot of lube, not even sure receiving anal does anything for me because I haven't done so with an actual human guy. I can say, however, toys shaped like the real thing have never been an issue when properly lubed because said toys are in fact smaller in diameter than some bathroom trips I've had after being a little backed up. Maybe my comparative disinterest in doing so can be chalked up to me not doing so with my toys all the time, but I have a vibrator intended for anal insertion. Surely that would do something for me on the right setting, right? No. No, it really doesn't, no matter the setting or how long I leave it in. And I find that disappointing because I got it on the recommendation of someone who said it was amazing. Or maybe I'm just a size queen.
     
  12. Philbrum1815

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    Any suggestions what to do with an anal Fissure? I've not met anyone to try it with yet but this is gonna cause me a major problem as it could be dangerous for me to proceed. It's awful
     
  13. Jakebusman

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    hope you get to experence that again
     
  14. tearingtherose

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    Thanks! I have a boyfriend so I'll say no more :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: