How long did it take you to come out?

I knew I was definitely different in Jr high/highschool. It's been a LONG kept secret, I never told anyone and kept my thoughts to myself. Everyone knows that I've never been very feminine, but I kept following the path of a woman duties, attitudes etc. Now I am 40, the feeling is stronger than ever to come out. I've come out to a couple of roommates, that have experience knowing others that are trans, since I knew they would accept that. My family is another issue all together. Specially explaining that I am trans male, but am very much attracted to men still.

 

Hiiii!! you again.

Maybe it isnt about telling everyone and coming out to everyone, maybe to just one person. That is what i did.. and it felt liberating, because it isnt with just one person its gonna have to happen repeatedly but you still can't go through this alone (in real life). I KNOW your bestfriend will be supportive and if anything, you can just say. i am confused... to just test the waters..

 

I'd say probably about a year ago I realized I liked girls and not boys. I remember this feeling I had for a girl in middle school that I haven't experienced with boys. It was until I was in high school that I might've questioned whether I was gay or not. Then somewhere in 10th grade I realized I was gay. So, about 5 months (I don't know if it was that long, I'm only guessing) after that realization, I finally opened up to it to my family and they couldn't have been more loving.

 

I started questioning about a year ago and I haven't come out yet.

 

Between accepting I was & telling someone, about a year, then 6 months later to finally really start telling my friends & family.

 

Decades to figure it out, then admit it and accept it, then about a year of coming out to people I felt had the need to know. Still out publicly only to known gay friends, although some people probably guess I am not quite straight because of my unwavering support for LGBT people (which includes me) and their rights. I don't care that much any more who knows, but I think some of these people are happier thinking of me as straight, as it fits into their perception of an orderly universe in which married people are considered to be straight by default, so I have no axe to grind with them that leads me to upset their perceptions. (But if any of them start to act homophobic towards anyone, I am all over them like flies on crap). Most of the time, nobody around me acts like they really care one way or the other, therefore it doesn't really matter what I am to them, so I just act like I always have because that's who I am and always have been. Hope this makes sense to you.

 

questioned sexuality since i was 10-11. denied that i was gay up until like 9 months ago. Still not out, hopefully will be soon tho.