How did going to therapy help you accept your sexuality?

I'm not sure my "therapy" experience could be considered a positive one as it was with Catholic Social Services in the early-mid 1970s and instead of trying to help me accept myself in a caring fashion the order of the day was to turn me into a happy heterosexual man with strong Christian values.
It didn't work. In fact I'm convinced reparative conversion therapy does far more harm than good for anyone.
On a positive note for me personally I decided the Therapist was a lout and my self orientation and identification became stronger than it ever was and I began to push back.
One of my happiest days came when the therapist threw me out of her office, told my folks I was incorrigible and she could not help me and did not wish to continue seeing me ever again.

 

I never actually spoke to a therapist about my sexuality, I spoke about my confidence issues. And as my confidence increased while I was following the therapist's advice, I found myself feeling more comfortable about opening up to people about my sexuality. Back when I was struggling with depression, I felt like I was useless and boring, and I felt like I wasn't setting a good example for homosexuals, being a useless gay man who couldn't get a boyfriend or a job or move out of his parents' place, and had no friends. I didn't feel impressive to other people. Once i started making progress with my confidence I started feeling less ashamed of my shortcomings and it became easier to accept my sexuality as just another part of me.

 

Exactly the positive result I gained from "Therapy".
Confidence.
Confidence to exclaim what you want me to be is not who I am.

 

It was nice to be able to talk about being gay in a no risk atmosphere to help me build up my confidence. I went to therapy through my university. Although I didn't end up doing it, my therapist had offered to set me up with a confidential "gay-mentor" from the GSA at my school to also help build my confidence. Maybe your's could do something similar.

Looking back, I was wreck, shakey talking about things and almost cried tons of times. Those gay-related conversations become much easier with time, trust me. So it was nice having most of those "first" conversations with someone who has to stay confidential, doesn't seem surprised by anything you say, and will gently try to push you out of your comfort zone while also being respectful of your comfort zone. Looking back, I might have even asked my therapist to try harder to push me out of my comfort zone, bring up more gay stuff.

 

When I started therapy, it was for being sexually abused as a child. Even though I knew I was gay, I had no intention of coming out to him or anyone. Through the whole process, and being threatened to be outed, I finally talked to my therapist about my sexuality.

We started out slow and after a few sessions I shared everything. First of all, it was a safe environment in which to discuss something that haunted me for years. Next, my therapist offered me insight that I never would have discovered. Like how much of my fear of being gay was internal and my reality wasn’t matching what was going on in my life. I felt like I had no friends and nobody would accept me... through therapy I found there was good support in my life, I was just too scared to recognize it. Finally, he encouraged me to go online and find support groups- that advice brought me to this amazing place. He told me to go to a Pride event, go to a gay bar and to get out.

I live in a rural area and I don’t know one gay person, however- my therapist has pushed me to keep trying something out of my comfort zone every couple of weeks. So far I’m here. I’m headed on a mini vacation to Boston in a few weeks and I plan on trying my first gay bar. This summer I plan on a Pride event.

Guess my therapist is my gay cheerleader!!! I’ve found the more open I am during sessions the stronger I feel- I no longer hold back. He gives me homework each time... sometimes it’s to overcome a fear- using public restrooms for example- where I have to overcome obstacles by getting out of my comfort zone by doing these activities repeatedly until I’m comfortable. A good therapist pushes you, in a positive way, to overcome your barriers. Mine won’t accept my self-doubt!!!