I dated my girlfriend (who happened to be my roommate in college) for 9 months. I have never been so happy in my entire life. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her because it felt so right. I am still madly in love with her. But sex was always a problem. I had made out with plenty of guys in the past and felt myself get turned on by them- my body wanted them. I would get all hot, wet, and shake. But I never had sex with one of them because I never wanted to go any further than fingering. I never wanted to touch their penises even though that aroused me, it still grossed me out. Over the course of 9 months, that never happened with my girlfriend. I got wet sometimes, but nothing like boys would do and I always felt so guilty because I could make her orgasm but it was always so one sided. I thought something was wrong with me. So me and my girlfriend went to this party one night and someone dared us both to kiss this boy. We both did, but I could tell that I wanted to have sex with him. My body was all for it. So we broke up because I told her this. But I am literally broken without her. She is still in love with me. She texted me today saying how much she missed me and all I could picture was lying in bed with her and just being with her. Me and her are perfect for each other in every other way. We didn't have any other big problems besides for the fact that I was not sexually attracted to her. But I want her back. I am in love with her and I want to be with her. I love laying naked with her and doing things to her sexually and I like when she touches me too, but I know that I am more sexually attracted to men. I don't know what to do because I don't know if being homoromantic heterosexual is it for me because it just is so hard to accept that in this society. And I know my girl would never go for it. I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with her without any sex stuff, but she couldn't do that. She wants sex. But I think about girls and I think how those are the ones I always have true crushes on, but then I think about boys and they are the ones that turn me on sexually but I don't want to be with them. I want to be with girls, my ex to be exact. I'm struggling.
From what I learned a homromantic heterosexual only want relationships with the same sex but don't feel sexual attraction to them . I know it's wrong of me to say this but I think maybe your bisexual but with a preference for men . I'm sorry I'm just going by what I've been told is a homoromantic heterosexual . Seems like you might have some deep issues with men that you aren't going further with them sexually and stopping yourself from doing so ..
Sad to hear something like this! If you guys really love each other then you both should learn how to compromise! If you're up for it, why not have an open relationship? I think this is the best way to fulfill your needs but you guys have to settle an agreement. Alternatively, if you just like the "d" why not have her wear the strap on dildo? This is a better decision if your gf is hesitant about the whole open relationship thing. Hope you guys can work it out!!
The sex toy isn't the same as a man and a man is more than just a penis . A sex toy is made of silicone , sometimes glass ,not all are life like and not all look like penises and the ones that look like penises aren't the same as a penis either . A penis has flesh and blood and semen . A dildo is not made out of flesh and blood Semen does not come out of a dildo also a dildo can replace a man . It's such a shame that even gay and straight men only think of themselves as just a penis and that all they have to offer is their penises to the world . Men should think of themselves as more than just a walking penis .
ahh yes thats the thing… I do not feel sexual attraction towards her, but I want to stay in our relationship. I love her and am attracted to her romantically, emotionally, physically, and intellectually… just not sexually. She doesn't know that part, but she wouldn't believe it. The sex thing is really tearing us apart.
I get what you are saying. Still, if it's just a little penetration that is causing her to not get aroused, then this might be a good solution for them. I think men are more then that, but her girlfriend has the emotional and the toy has the physical, so I think his sugestion is worth a try.
I'm not saying his suggest is not worth a try at all . What I'm saying is a strap on dildo and a penis or man is not the same thing . I really don't get why people compare them together and act like it's the same . If she's just after penetration it makes sense but comparing a man to a strap on dildo is what I have a problem with . I'm also a lesbian that likes penetration myself and I use a dildo and i have slept with a man and i can tell you they are not the same thing . I hope I'm making sense .
surely if you want to do sexual things to her you're sexually attracted to her? I dont see what the problem is - you want to do sexual things with her and you want to be with her, so be with her
The problem is that when she goes to do things to me, I don't get turned on. It's made us both feel guilty- me for not being able to get turned on by her and her because she can't do it for me.
I kind of know how you feel. I like people of both sexes romantically, but I only want to have sex with women. I feel as though this forces me to only seek relationships with the same gender. However, I would feel completely devastated if I met a really nice and sweet guy and got to know him, but then have him leave because I couldn't give him sex. It must be especially hard for you, since you are deeply in love with her, regardless of how you feel about the sex. I sadly don't know what to say except to try and talk this out with her again. Tell her that the attraction to guys is purely sexual, but that she is the only one you love. Perhaps you can maybe work something out, if you can really show her how much she truly means to you. Best of luck to you! I'm sorry I don't have any other advice, but I really want you to be with her. I know you really love her and I know you both would be blessed to have each other once again. ---------- Post added 4th Nov 2014 at 04:06 PM ---------- Also, I think it's okay to be a homoromantic heterosexual. There's nothing wrong with it. People always say that it's more so the emotional connection that counts, so may, one day you'll find a girl (if it's not your ex) who will be okay with who you are and will love you for the amazing person you are. Plus, there are also a few asexual lesbians and bisexual girls, so don't give up hope completely! Let me know if you need more help!
