hi I hope you’re all having a great day I wanted to make this thread because I’m in something of a crisis when it comes to gender dysphoria in my life right now. I’m 16 years old in my first year of sixth form and still closeted as trans. The dress code for the sixth form requires for all boys to wear a suit all the time, with a very strict set of rules. I hate wearing a suit, especially when every day I see girls my age wearing skirts and female clothing, it feels pretty humiliating. My parents are also pretty strict on how long I have my hair, which currently is about 4 inches on the top and 2 inches on the back and sides. Any longer and they usually force me to cut it. I’m also quite tall for my age (about 5 feet 11 inches). Im taller than most of my male friends, never mind female and at the moment I can’t see myself being happy with my height post transition. Sometimes I avoid speaking because of my deep voice which I absolutely hate. Basically the long and short of it is that I look and sound very much like a typical boy and I absolutely hate it. Not because of the unpleasantness of the experience itself, but because there’s literally nothing I can do about it. I want there to be something I can do, even if it’s only small to make myself seem just a little bit more feminine around people. Anyway that’s enough rambling, any replies or advice would be really really appreciated!
Hm well if you gotta stay closetted and you go to a school with such a strict dress code, i'm not sure what to suggest...something small, surely. I'm the opposite, a transgender male, so i'm really just grasping at straws here. What about wearing a little makeup? Not much obviously, but like a little something. Whatever won't break dress code. You could even do it just in your room! That's what i do most of the time, cause my family would never accept me. Or like buy a little necklace or bracelet. Walmart's got plenty for cheap. Or go online and order something. I'm trying to suggest little things that are feminine, but still things a guy can do that are still socially acceptable so you won't risk being found out before you're ready, but can still feel feminine. Like i have a cheap little three dollar christmas bracelet with little bells on it i wear sometimes at work cause its the holiday season. If you can do your own shopping, what about buying a pair of undergarments? Again, you can wear them just in your room without anybody else knowing. Use self checkout! For real, none of the employees care what you're buying and most of the customers are more focused on their kids, spouses, and phones than anyone else.
If it makes you feel any better, and I hope it does, where I am from (USA) lots of girls are the height you are. Some are shorter, some are taller, but most are generally 5'10 at my high school. I'm 5'8 -ish and wish I was taller!
Lots of men have long hair. Maybe you can convince your parents that it’s okay if you have long hair. Show them peers who have long hair. And celebrities. It’s not abnormal at all. Or maybe they will let you have more of a fringe? Girls in suits are pretty hot actually Maybe you can take care of your skin, body hair and nails to feel better? Use hair conditioner? Or maybe some more gender neutral body care products? Deodorant? Soap? Body lotion? You could also accessorise in the way you want, still sticking to the dress code.
