Hello! Im Dorian I’m AFAB but i have been having some trouble identifying with my AGAB for like 3 years or so maybe (minor moments when I was younger). Right now i have gone back into sudden gender dysphoria again like I had in 2020/2021 where I identified as a demiboy for almost a year. After that I kinda went back to identifying as Cis again and ignoring Gender identities in order not to overthink them. Im almost completely happy with my body so im not trans really. But I sometimes have quite big waves of gender dysphoria (not about my body parts)and expressing feminine like wearing make up for a few hours can lead to break downs and discomfort for me I kind of feel mostly like a “feminine boy” like I would enjoy expressing feminine in a way boys do. I’m really looking forward to receiving advice from preferably Trans people but not exclusively ofc Yours, Dorian <3
I’ll say don’t let your gender define who you are. But also wear any label with pride. Just because you are certain gender doesn’t mean you have to behave a certain way. We’re all different but labels can help us find a sense of belonging. You don’t really give enough information to indicate one or the other. Here’s a few signs that you are actually transgender male: -Prefer being called the masculine -Want to be treated as a man -Daydreaming about scenarios (eg what if I was born a male?) -Typically there are signs when you were younger that suggest you would prefer being male. These include stuff like preference for male clothing, traditionally male activities and dislike of feminine things. These feelings often persist and don’t go away. -Euphoria or happiness when seen as masculine. I don’t know much about genders unfortunately. It’s one of my weak points. I only really know male, female and non-binary. I’m sure other people here can help you more with it. Also don’t feel pressured into any gender. I hope you can find out soon enough, but don’t worry about it too much if you can’t decide. Coincidentally I only decided a couple weeks ago that I’m actually trans! It made me feel a lot better about it but it took a lot of thinking about it. You seem like a lovely person Dorian <3
It's also worth noting that you don't have to experience significant body dysphoria to have gender identity that differs from your assigned gender at birth. Gender dysphoria can manifest in various ways, including discomfort with societal expectations, gender roles, or expressions. It's essential to listen to your feelings and experiences, even if they don't fit neatly into existing labels. There is also something called euphoria, that is a state of overwhelming exitement when you express yourself in your gender. Identifying as a "feminine boy" is a way to express your gender identity. Gender expression is separate from gender identity, and people can express themselves in ways that feel most comfortable and authentic to them. If you find that you feel more comfortable and happy expressing yourself in a way that combines elements of both femininity and masculinity, that's perfectly okay to do. I'm transgender male, but I do have feminine side. I'm trying to achive that balance between femininity and masculinity to feel comfortable in my body.
Hi, Dorian! On top of what the others said, I'd like you to ask yourself: what's your goal? If you were to imagine your future, who would your ideal self be (in terms of gender)? For example, when I was first figuring myself out, I would think what it would be like to go to my sister's wedding in ~10 years time - I could not suffer the thought of showing up as her sister, but being there as her brother, post transition, would bring tears of joy to eyes. I even drew myself as I imagined I would look like, I was (and still am) that envious of that potential future self. You say you feel like a feminine boy, and would like to express yourself in that way. That's a good start, and you can actually do that right now. What about the future, do you see yourself as a feminine man as you age? How does that look like for you? What are some traits that you'd like to have as boy, and then as a man? I'm a binary trans guy, so these are things that helped me specifically, and might not help you very much. But I think it's worth a shot exploring that, worst case scenario you realise you're not a binary guy and then you have one less thing to question. Overall I think it's better to figure out what you want and then, with those facts, you can decide which label best describes you.
