Firstly I just wanted to say hello to all forum members, realising so many people feel similar to me is a god send. Anyway I hope you're all well, and can help me, I'm struggling with my sexuality. Basically I'm 28 and I've always questioned my sexuality, but recently it's come to a head. Can I just say I'm trying to be honest so I hope people don't judge me. 1) since I was young I messed around with guys,never had a relationship, but I've had a few sexual encounters and enjoyed them all until the next day when I'm filled with guilt. I sleep with girls too, but recently I've started to look at guys differently from the past an wonder what it would be like to date. 2) I have a girlfriend of 2 years, I've never cheated or been with anyone else but I fantasise about men and watch a lot of gay porn. Everything was ok, but as I've said recently I feel stronger about my urges. 3) I've never told anyone close to me, I come from a semi professional sporting background and there is a certain stigma attached - I'm almost ashamed. I do find women attractive, but men sexy. It's a strange feeling. I need some help with direction - am I gay? I have no gay friends and don't know which way to turn for advice. I do love my gf, but I think it's a different kind of love, I don't feel the passion.. I need your help... Thanks for reading Dan
I'm going to tell you a little story, maybe it'll help you with figuring out how you feel bout your gf. I'm a girl and I dated a girl for almost three years. Now while we were dating I could swear up and down that I was completely in love and wanted to marry her but then we hit a rough patch and things got really bad. I had moments int the last few months we dated where I would very fleetingly think about breaking up with her but I would blow it off and just convince myself I was just mad at the time. Then one day she wanted to talk, she wanted for us to break up. Now let me tell you, I didn't want to at first at all, but then she said something that made me realize something. I didn't love her like I used too, I only loved her as a friend. Now this may sound silly but these two kinds of love can be very easy to confuse with each other! I was just comfortable and it was the norm that we were together so when we both realized we didn't love each other anymore well...we felt more happy know it! At the end of use breaking up we were laughing and having a good time, and we were both crying out eyes out moments before! My point in all of this is, you have to decide if your love for her is the kind it need to be to be in a relationship! If you decide you only love her as a friend well...it's not going to be easy to break up. With hope you two could still be friends just like I am with my ex! It's really important to do what will make you happy, and as far as the family thing goes? If you ever tell them start off with telling them how much you love them and how you don't want anything to tear you apart from them, however it's important to be who you are. My girlfriend almost lost her parents over being gay but they saw the light and stuck with her. now they don't like it at all and if its mentioned they get anxious and stuff but they still put up with it! In my opinion maybe you should date a guy! You might find that one person thats really meant for you! And hey, just because you date a guy doesn't men you couldn't go back to girls if you wanted too!
