So I came out to my parents and friends as ftm about 3 months ago and my friends are all really supportive, but my parents have been taking baby steps with accepting it and todat my dad referred to me as "he" which was like a big step for him, but then quickly ruined it with "it would be easier for me if you acted more like a guy." Well by those standards they wouldn't have addressed me as "she" my entire life either cause even though I'm not the stereotypical male, I'm not the stereotypical female either and I just don't get why if I would rather identify as male, that I can't have female characteristics too. And I feel like gender roles give me enough doubt about transitioning already so I don't really need that extra doubt from other people and sometimes it's hard to remind myself that if I wanna be a guy that would rather watch a chickflick with my female relatives than to watch a sports game with my male relatives, then that's okay. Like I know I don't fully identify as female or fully as male, but I'd rather have a male gender marker versus the other and it's just frustrating sometimes when I can't get other people, especially my family, to understand that. I'm afraid that if I do decide to transition, I'm gonna end up trying to act more like the stereotypical male just to get that respect from others and lose parts of myself in that. Like why can't people understand that even though I'd rather identify as a male that my personality is always gonna be similar to that of a tomboy and when I constantly hear things about it, it just makes me doubt what I want even more and I just hate it. Okay rant over lol
I can relate to you, my mother has accused me of lying or being confused about me being female because I still like "boys things" and have masculine characteristics in my personality, I personally consider myself a tomboy, but she much like your father in your case seems to think that I can't be a "true girl" unless I act like a stereotypical girly girl. It's tough man, but just ignore them and be yourself; you shouldn't have to conform to anyone's standards. *hugs*
I hear ya. I asked my bro what he'd think if I became a boy and he said he couldn't see because I'm to feminine. And by that logic I should be seen as female because I am too masculine. There are plenty of feminine cis and trans gender men out there. Don't let anyone say who you can and can't be
Yup. Gender roles suck. There was this group of jerks at my old school who used to think it was a big joke to call me 'the queer girl' because 'she acts more like a boy'. But then they didn't know about my gender identity. Still, I don't get why people judge by gender roles.
I hate the intense gender roles in the school systems. Guys in Australia are expected to be bogans, have no care for their looks, and work in trades.
Perhaps your Dad meant that if you suddenly acted differently than you used to, it would be easier for him to see and call you differently. Great rant btw.
I know its stupid what I think is really stupid is that woman can wear most mens clothes and society dosent care but when a man wears womans clothes he is a "queer fag"
