Gaydar? Is it real?!

'Gaydar' stems from being able to pick up on signals - body language, mannerisms, voice tones etc.

If you've surrounded yourself with all things gay or have gay friends/family then it's something you learn subconsciously - all my own opinion of course.

Gaydar is not infallible though. There are plenty of gay guys/girls you wouldn't realise were gay.

 

Gaydar is completely stereotyping, but what else can you do from afar?

I find myself doing the same thing... Length of nails, hair, clothing, eye liner etc... It is a rough guide, but it can help.

Remember this isn't official, there could be people you brush off for being straight when thy aren't. Look especially at their eye-line. Do they look at their own gender? Do they check them out? Do they look over at you?....

Good luck!

 

Sometimes it's just a sense of comfort that you feel, you just intuitively "know" that the other person sees the world from "your perspective", and you feel more relaxed because of that. I think you can discover that not necessarily from the mannerisms, but the way a woman relates to others, and the way she speaks... Although I always wonder if I give off those vibes, because whenever I suspect or even know the other person is a lesbian, they never give me any sign that they see me... they completely ignore me, probably because I look "femme". :/ How many times I wished that someone noticed I'm queer, I would really appreciate someone who sees through me, I think I'm not that mysterious...

 

This are essentially two things: you have a feeling someone might be gay... based on stereotypes or you see how they look for example at their own gender... etc... or just a feeling...
and there is this eye contact where you really have the feeling information is exchanged...

usually you can tell how people look at you...

in your case if you are femme people might not presume you're gay so often, so you might for example think about using rainbow accesoires...
and you might initiate eye contact, so others could react... as said, looking friendly and interested... often this leads to moving closer and eventually to a talk... like about her nice hairstyle... (can all be practised, and if she's not what you hoped for you might just move on... )

 

I disagree, it's not just about recognising stereotypes at all.

 

Right. Member gazwkd has this dialed, to the tune of 120%. It is about cues, either that they display or that they aim at YOU! I'm going to talk about guys here, because I'm a guy. We've all seen the guy in the suburbs with his wife and children who looks slightly less masculine than what might be the baseline, but is 100% straight. We've all seen the guy who looks like he belongs in an ad for shaving cream shown during a sporting event who is checking out another guy as if he's a dog in heat, and is therefore far from straight.

Gaydar is a type of radar, right? It's about reception, not stereotypes. We need to knock off this stereotype crap because it's become a baseline for bickering, slightly obsessive, and coming up with excuses to be almost overly thin skinned. And, like gazwkd and others have said, it is not infallible. Sometimes, we read the cues incorrectly, where someone who said/did/glanced in a way that was thought to be gay isn't and someone who kept talking about all the "hot chicks" at the happy hour, after guzzling more liquor, was then caught looking a nanosecond, or two, or three, too long at the handsome after-work guys also in the bar.

Gaydar IS real. However, it's not infallible. I have registered with some people on short exposure because of my looking too long or asking questions which might have indicated interest and over longer exposure based on how neat and organized I can be and stuff like that. I've also had random people, like salespeople, chat me up about playoffs and sports scores, especially if I'm at a happy hour, which I've gone to for purposes of their food specials and not so much for the liquor.

Finally, gaydar can be useful. It's highly "pheromonal." It's employed to either pick up or give off that you might be in the 3% to 4% that is a "subject of interest."

It's a great expression, too. I found it incredibly funny and clever the first time I heard it.

 

I sort of think I might have it. However, it's mostly with guys. Also, a lot of the guys that I have "used" it on have been stereotypical, kind of.