"Gay people should just keep it to themselves"

Aw, but I love showing displays of affection in public settings - why you gotta be so mean.

 

Yes! I agree. Ashley is really sweet, and on point.

 

It really annoys me when people say that gay people just throw being gay into everyones face. Straight people do it all the time with their soppy stuff through social media.

 

I'll keep it to myself only when I don't have to see straight couples in the: movies and tv and magazines and on the streets and on campus and in books and literature and during dinners and musicals and theatres and the workplace and stadiums and kiss-cams and in the middle of a potential great series. Everything in The Notebook was awesome except the moment the straight couple kissed. That was just a no-go. When straight people confine their entire sexuality (of it which comes love, passion, idolising, and friendships) to the four corners of their bedroom, I'll do the same.

 

I do not care what anyone does, whether they open scream from the roof tops or not, it is their life and their choice to make. I myself would not go around announcing the fact I am gay, but nor would I ever hide it. If people do not like it then that is their choice, just keep out of my life and we will both be happy. But then, I do not see much in the way of any of it here in the UK, I am sure there is plenty of it around. But so far I have found where I live to be very open and accepting of everything.

 

Straight people just don't get how much energy it takes to "keep it to ourselves". They sure don't keep their heterosexuality to themselves.

 

I've been completely out for many years. I'm by no means an activist, but I remember the days when societal norms forced people like me to be closeted, and I refuse to go back.

That said, it's rare when I bring up being gay in day-to-day interactions, and I'm not one to engage in PDAs. At the same time, when two men own a house like we do, the neighbors pretty much can't help being clued in about our status. In order to "keep it to ourselves"... well, I don't know how we'd do that when it comes to our living situation. Except to the clueless, it's pretty obvious. But I'll tell you this, you will certainly never hear me describing us as "roommates" or my partner as "someone I know"!

If someone can't handle my relationship, which is obvious without me saying anything, that's on them, not me.

 

Mhm. More so online than offline, but I've had my fair share of those comments offline. I feel as if these people need a little taste of their own medicine, personally. I'll bet a million dollars it would enrage them to the point of defense!

 

its like am not homphobic or anything but its not normal is it :eek: which does kind of make tham homophobic

 

The phrase in incomplete.

"Gay people should just keep it to themselves"...like get a room, and if it has a closet, all the better...

Fact is, a majority of the population supports us, but, as what happened when the American football player Michael Sam kissed his BF on national TV, a majority of people couldn't get over the "ick" factor.

The only thing we can do is increase what I would like to call our "PDA coefficient", that is, if we kiss our significant others, in public, and often enough we will achieve a critical number of times the average person gets to see us do that...so pucker up folks (of course, use your judgment as to where it is safe), all we have to lose is our shame!

 

Yes. My partner and I heard it from her father frequently, before we were out to him. Ironically, when we did come out, he was upset it had been kept from him.

To help you make sense of this (A) and (B), the people who say this feel:

(A) Straightness isn't aberrant...there's no reason and no way that straight people can keep that to themselves, any more than we can keep it to ourselves that we're human. But if you choose to do something aberrant and sick, at least don't flaunt it.

(B) Yes, exactly. You are supposed to facilitate a little fantasy world for them where your only partners are hetero, and where sexualities other than straight do not exist. My partner's father was very explicit about this...not only was I no longer welcome to visit, but she was not allowed to mention me or talk about me.

No, they do not equate coming out with dancing nude at a pride parade...they equate coming out with telling them that there really are demons in the world, and that you traffic with them.

 

The most liberal people in my family (other than myself, obviously, lol) are the ones that say, "I don't mind if people are gay as long as they don't shove it in my face" ...I guess this is why I haven't come out to them...

I feel like there are very few people who are in the middle on lgbt issues... it's either they're cheering from the rooftops or telling everyone to keep it behind closed doors... I wish more people were just normal about it, since it should be a normal thing... T.T

 

Benway, dear...this kid has your number. Everyone one of his responses to you in this thread has been dead-on...even after your ridiculous and unfair attack on his age.

 

I've never thought of that, I've not heard anyone say "they should keep it to themselves" but when I talk about relationships I tend to keep it gender neutral. Like when if someone mentions my girl friend I just call her my ex and go out of my way to avoid referring to her as female, it just makes me feel uncomfortable to talk about the fact I was with a girl. But likewise with getting a BF, I'm still pretty closeted so when my auntie comes round she always says "how's a handsome man like you not got a GF yet?" and I just say I'm not looking for a relationship just now (even though I'm dying for one!). I just refer to a boyfriend as a 'relationship'.

 

If we did, how would we find each other, and dates......

 

The idea that they should keep it to themselves is asinine; especially when straight people don't.

 

Sometimes it feels like two straight people could be dry humping in the park, then suddenly stop and run over to the other end of the park to yell at a gay couple for holding hands as they walk, and then everyone takes the side of the dry humping straight couple.

 

Unfair? He's at an age that no one can begin to recognize the futility of the life around them. Do you know what I'd give to be 15, again? Knowing what I know now? My "attack" was not ridiculous-- it was realistic. Why do we keep lying to ourselves? It's like suddenly we're so important because we're sentient-- oh big woop. Let me tell you something, cognisance isn't any fun at all and the desire to believe in free will is a logical fallacy.

I'm a determinist. I know that no matter what we do as a person, a people or a planet we cannot ultimately change anything in any sort of "grand scheme." There's no God or gods, science is a poor attempt at emulating godhood and politics is as old as time itself and suddenly we're sticking our fingers in the pies of all three, trying to unite them as if that's suddenly going to make everything better. I was told, not just in the gay context of the phrase but in it's general context that "it gets better."

Well it doesn't. And we all need to stop lying to ourselves and accept that it only gets a whole hell of a lot fucking worse.

 

Well I think your way off on a lot of things and your the only one acting like a teenager in this thread.

 

Why are you even talking? It doesn't matter that TENNY is only 15 and you're 27. In fact imo he has a hell of a lot more knowledge than you. I also can't agree with anything you're saying. You make everything sound so negative. It may not have gotten better for you but I've seen it get much better for a lot of people.