Figuring-out-my-gender-identity journey

So im athena and im a female but lately i have been thinking whether i am man rather than a woman. To begin with im a tomboy lesbian(if i have to name it) and out of the blue i had these thoughts. Actually i thought about it many many times but it was very on the spot and lasted 2 minutes except another two times that i thought about it more. But now the signs that i recognize are more "serious" and that's why i have been thinking about it more. First i dress menly all the time and i dont like anything girly on me like curves small shoulders breasts long hair make up(i dont have an issue with my genitilia), I don't want anybody to see me naked even in sex i dont feel comfortable or i dont feel comfortable someone touching me "there". There was a time that i could not even look my self naked in the mirror,now i can but two minutes max. When i go to the beach i dont want to wear a bikini(i do only when my mother makes me) so most times i go with a men's swimsuit(and at top a sports bra). I have picture myself in random moments to be a guy and i liked it it felt home. When i was a kid and we were role playing i was always a guy and liked playing with "boy toys" and again not dressing with dresses and girly stuff. Before i had my first girl crush(and found out im a lesbian) i liked girls but i kept imagining me as a boy(i was so pure i didn't think that was not "normal").I dont know if i missed any of my thoughts but lastly something i think is pretty notable is that i fear of talking to my therapist because im afraid she will tell that im overthinking and that im not trans(like i want to be but dont want to be?)...im so confused i know there are not specific criteria and it's the first time i share these thoughts and it's like a burden came off

 

Thank you very much for answering me i was really nervous Can you describe what you mean when you are saying imaginative embodiment? So you were thinking you were a man for years and then you changed? Have you felt being a man since then? It must have been very confusing this journey(at least i would feel confused it doesn't mean you would too).
I feel like a woman but i think because my whole life i was a woman and i strongly believed that and that i wasnt a man. Up until now. That's another reason im not sure (like a social reason i think). Im stuck to the idea that maybe im wrong and that i will regret it but when i think about it it hurts like why can't it be easier?
I don't know if i was clear in the woman part by the way. And i wanna thank you again for your attention and everything because it's the first time im discussing this topic and it helped