Do you imagine in 50 years time, coming out won't be such a big deal after all?

tl;dr:-

Time and time again it comes down to:-
1. Fear the unknown
2. Find out about the unknown, don't fear it much (alas sometimes thanks to powerful people/groups stoking up hatred this takes a while to happen)
3. Next generation doesn't fear it because it's not unknown, and they ensure discriminatory practices/legislation are consigned to the history books.
4. Next generation doesn't see it; as it's just normal

I certainty think things will be much easier in 50 years time. This topic takes me back to High School when we were looking at the subject of racism and integration; the basic gist went:-

When the first major wave of Asian (Indian subcontinent) and Black (mainly Caribbean) immigrants came to the UK they were a group that was feared with there odd beliefs and different colours (my mum even remembers seeing a coloured person (in the flesh) for the first time in her teens (mid-late 1960s) when she went on a trip to London - I can't remember anything like that but then again about 20% of my class at primarly school were non-white). However over time (especially as more immigrants came to the UK) people actually got to mingle with these people and realised they had the same hopes, dreams and aspirations as the rest of us. Then their kids started growing up and sharing a childhood which means they further bonded - this generation of kids however heard racist terms and what not at home; and although they bonded they still had this niggling difference at the back of their mind. However this is the generation of kids that is now in power, running companies and working through the ranks of power.

Then the next generation came along - as there parents knew it was wrong racist terms were used much less (if at all) and the kids were able to get along and see the coloured person as "Iqbal" and not the "Asian guy". Over the next 20 - 30 years it's this generation that will be moving through the ranks of power where discriminating against people because of their race won't even cross their minds.

That's not to say that everything is a bed of roses - many kids still get to hear racism spilled from there parents mouth but these tend to be those most deprived who are looking for someone to blame for their situation - of course the straight white male with 2.4 kids isn't that person!


Turning to the LGB side of things.:-

During the 1950s homosexuality was criminalised and therefore few people knew first hand anyone who was gay. Over time people slowly but surely started meeting gay people - but this initial wave (because of the previous oppression and being banned from following many of the norms set down for heterosexual people - i.e. meet a nice girl; get married; move in together; have 2.4 children) had to find there own way in the world - heck if you can't get married and don't have kids what is going to hold you together through the rough times? - Then the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s thrust homosexuality into the public consciousness (and not necessarily in a good way). The tabloids were operating at their lowest, publicly outing people. By the mid half of the decade many communities throughout the country were in terminal decline, and this meant by the mid 1990s many people knew of someone who was gay, but were also wanting something better for their country.

The 1997 Labour government promised just that - but this government also seamed to arrive at a time the country was rising once again from the early 1990s rescission and was looking onwards and upwards; the number of gay people in TV and the public life was starting to increase. The 1970s image of masculinity disappeared - first with New Wave then Metrosexulity (i.e. people who "looked gay" in the 1970s actually became most young men); Throughout the early 2000s pretty much all the discriminatory legislation against LGB was wiped clean; leaving more and more people feeling safe in being able to come out; meaning more people knew gay people and realised they had nothing to feer; meaning more people feeling safe to come out....

Over the next half decade pretty much the last discriminatory legislation against LGB should be eradicated and hopefully huge strides against bullying (especially in schools) should be made (the allegations now being revealed about various persons of power and there behaviour especially in the 1970s and 1980s are having the fortunate side effects of child abuse in all it's forms finally being taken seriously - of which bullying is a small part - alas it's taken a scandal like that to trigger it). This means that by the time the current generations kids are at school those who grew up when homosexuality was criminalised will be dropping in number, be out of all the positions of power (by virtue of being in there 80s and 90s) and we'll be onto a generation where homophobia does not exist.

We are already getting to the stage where some people don't even come out to their friends as such - they just happen to gain a boyfriend or start identifying boys they are attracted to; over the next few years this is only going to be more frequent; heck this has changed in less than 15 years - when I was at school no-one was gay (and I now know at least three of my form of 24 were!) and the promotion of homosexuality in school was illegal - now my brother (currently a supply teacher) is finding at least one kid in every class he teaches is gay / is attracted to others of the same gender. These are the kids that grew up in the early 2000s where there were "normal" people on TV shows who were gay; who listened to a radio presenter (who happened to be gay) every evening (Scott Mills on BBC Radio 1 - the main youth station in the UK); and who now listen to a radio presenter who happens to be gay every morning (Nik Grimshaw on BBC Radio 1 - the main youth station in the UK); and where coming out as straight isn't unheard of.

I get the impression from the coverage of the US election that LGB rights in the US have just hit there 1997 moment - the threshold has been passed and supporting LGB rights is no longer a vote loser, and may in fact be a vote winner (or at least opposition to them may be a vote loser).

Another gradual thing since the 1960s has been the terminal decline of the church - and with it marriage being the be all and end all - sleeping outside of wedlock, being a single parent, being single, not having children and remarrying have all become the norm ; in my form at school by the final year only THREE of us were conceived after our parents were married, and lived with both our parents who were still in the relationship. The remaining 15 (our class got smaller as the years went on and there were two sets of twins) kids were either born out of wedlock; had a single parent; or now had a step-parent! Even though this doesn't contribute directly to the increasing acceptance of LGB it means the expected norm is a lot more fuzzy than it ever was.

They "the church" are doing themselves a good enough job of writing themselves out of existence - the pandering to the nut jobs in Africa especially (e.g. women bishops, gay marriage*) is making them more and more irrelevant by the week; religious observance in the UK (amongst the indigenous population) is in terminal decline and has been for a number of decades. The various scandals in the catholic church (dispite this mainly being a protestant country) have also helped make them irrelevant.

A quip I heard a few years ago - "to become President (of the US) you have to pledge you allegiance to God and big up your faith - to be Prime Minister (of the UK) you have to keep it quite as people will think you are a nut job" - watching the various speeches from Obama/McCain and Cameron and it's really noticeable how often the word God is sprinkled by the former, and never uttered by the latter. The language used by one of the first comments on a BBC News article about former PM Tony Blair joining the Catholic Church after he stepped down as PM says it all really "I think Tony Blair has been a 'closet' Catholic for a long time. I do feel, however, that he should have come out of that closet whilst he was in office."

* Although apparently the newly appointed (today) Archbishop of Canterbury is in favour of the former, and willing to talk to the gay community

The one constant amongst the opposition for most of the equalities legislation (especially when equalising the rights straight and gay people have) has been the church, and time and time again they have lost.


(sorry if my language offends, it's not meant to)
(and from the LGB perspective I'll write as a male just to keep it simple)

 

But surely there will be a way to recover this thread somehow just to see what we said, hehehe.

---------- Post added 10th Nov 2012 at 08:23 AM ----------

Wow, wouldn't that be cool if EC WAS around then?? Haha, doubtful but you never know eh?