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Do you have a certain type ?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Red1, Dec 8, 2023.

  1. LlouW

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    Thanks for posting that. I have been curious about threesomes recently and thought I would like to try it. It is very interesting to me to hear what you and Tearingtherose had to say about it. A different combination of people, but still pretty well the same observation.
    Ready for the next one? Similar to the threesome thing, I think 69 is highly over-rated. But having said that, I guess I should leave that alone for the sake of decency! In both cases, I think there is too much distraction.
     
  2. JT1999

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    For sex as entertainment, I would highly recommend a threesome. But actually having one (well, two weekends worth), it made me realise/remember that there’s more to sex than entertainment. There is no romance, and it’s very emotionally demanding especially if one person is your long term partner. I’m glad I did it, no regrets and will definitely do it again but i’m not in a rush, and it’s not a particularly good substitute for someone looking for woman/woman, the man being present changes the vibe substantially.

    I like 69 as a warmup but yeah it’s too distracting and less than ideal position compared to taking in turns.
     
  3. LlouW

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    Very interesting observation. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences. I might someday try a threesome with two women. I figure a man would change the vibe of it. It's funny that you said just what I was thinking it would be.
    As for 69, yes exactly what my experience is.
     
  4. JT1999

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    Two other women would be something else I’m sure. I’ll probably never try it, but I can always dream :smile:
     
  5. Littavhvert

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    I'm a femme for femme.

    I'm attracted to feminine and straight passing women. Often what you associates with the conventionally attractive women that straight men likes. I likes when a woman has long hair, a feminine body shape, soft feminine facial features and wear outfits with colors that fits her.

    Examples on celebrities that I finds attractive are Nathalie Portman, Nathalie Emmanuel, Keira Knightley, Emma Watson and Jennifer Connelly. Other celebrities I finds attractive and who have what I view as the ideal body are Shakira and Beyonce. What all these women have in common are their femininity, youthful appearance and beauty. They all got the long and gorgeous locks. I have a tendency to be more drawn to brown eyes and black or dark brown hair, but I finds women from all over the world attractive.

    I have a strong preference for femme. I could maybe date other types of women too, but it won't be the same. I likes the "two girl best friends is together" dynamic in a relationship. There's no need for a man or someone imitating a man for a fulfilling relationship, in my opinion.
     
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  6. JT1999

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    I've never had a proper romantic relationship with another woman but quite a few friends-with-benefits and I really liked that dynamic. I really miss it, there is something not quite the same in a straight relationship.
     
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  7. Altanero

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    Mmm... on the sexual side, it's a recurring joke of mine for my friends that I'm open to any kind of types, that depends on the time of the day :laughing::laughing:

    But, now talking seriously, as I've grown up with straight men, I like a lot the dynamic of male buddies and bromances. I wish that in a relationship. That level of confidence between two guys, but also physical and emotional intimacy, which often lacks in a friendship of two straight guys. I've found it in some of my straight friends, however, and that's what I want in a gay romantic relationship too.
     
  8. HM03

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    That's the thing. I feel like most people have a type that they are more attracted to. But there is a small but very vocal group on dating apps etc that basically bully people that aren't their type. I truly hope the majority of people have a type but are open to others.

    **
    For appearance, I'd say "granola" guys and body is a huge plus.

    I wouldn't say it's overly important to me. Haven't been on a date/dated a guy that's been really my type. I've just been thrilled to be on a date with a cute guy that that doesn't have a trash personality lmao
     
  9. JT1999

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    The dating scene is inherently discriminatory. We reject people or get rejected by people for reasons that would be illegal if we were denied a job for the same reasons. Age, sex, height, weight, race, personality, sexuality. I think thats OK really, the best thing to do is swiftly move on. I have no time for bullies or people that shout 'discrimination' if they are denied a date.

    I'm not sure what to think of the hookup apps that only allow filtering by gender ID and not by sex. I have no problem with penises but there are a lot of lesbian girls who aren't going to want to get with someone who has one, even if they are a woman.
     
    #49 JT1999, Feb 13, 2024
    Last edited: Feb 13, 2024
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  10. tearingtherose

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    It's a really grey area, and uncomfortable at that. I'm one of those gay guys that would want my partner to have a penis. As I'm primarily attracted to masculine men, I'm probably OK, but it's not impossible that a heavily masculinised FtM could be attractive to me, but if they've not had bottom surgery, what would I do?

    I know I'd like to think I'd be receptive, much as I "put up" with my wife's anatomy but I also know that I was sexually unfulfilled.

    Before anyone dismisses me as a vagina hater, I think the female body is a marvel of biology and that the male body is dull in comparison, it's simply that I draw no aesthetic or sexual value from it.
     
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  11. Red1

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    Good honest post. I'm glad I started this discussion as I thought I might be different as I'm not into men in general, but a specific type i.e. feminine men. I'm sure you have great relationships with women who have the same interests and outlook on life. Only thing I wonder, would two feminine lesbians get rude comments from straight men if they show affection in public.
     
  12. JT1999

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    I've never had rude comments but it does get attention. My first kiss with a girl was in a club, supposedly to attract the attention of some guys we were interested in. Turned out it was me she was interested in.
     
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  13. shon

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    I really like tall guys. I'm 5'8" and most guys my age seem to tower over me at 6' or above. I'm not a huge fan of either masculinity or ultra femininity, I like androgynous guys who aren't personally assertive. I'm also a sucker for a cute clean-shaven face, beards don't do much for me.

    Extra points if they have a very nice booty and a big... y'know.
     
  14. AnxiousReader

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    I definitely do! I tend to be split in terms of the women I like. Either I like femme, blonde cheerleader type girls with blue eyes, or I like Mediterranean or Spanish looking women with darker complexions, dark hair, and brown eyes.
     
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  15. Littavhvert

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    What people consider offensive varies from person to person, but in my opinion many straight men act inappropriately and are rude. If two feminine women kiss, men tends to stare, sexualize them and imagine them in a MFF-threesome. It's not uncommon seeing unicorn-hunters both online and in public. It's mostly straight men, but also straight couples, who looks for a threesome. I think people should be allowed to have their fantasies and seek own kink-communities, but approaching any lesbian couple in public gets tiresome and annoying. I'm single and fortunately not experienced it myself in real life. I have however seen such people on dating apps. I'm not interested in men sexually and when I write on my profile I'm looking for a monogamous relationship with a woman, I don't want random men to hit on me. When someone says they only dates women, I don't understand why people assume they are polyamorous bisexuals.
     
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  16. JT1999

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    I've had that on apps and websites years ago. It was a bit annoying but not the end of the world. Just block and move on. I had all my profiles either set to lesbian or interested in women only, even though I am bi, but I still got men messaging me, never any couples. I just did not want to hook up with men full stop, I think its a trust thing. You pretty much know another woman isn't going to hurt you, get you pregnant, give you a disease or brag to all her mates.
     
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  17. Ingvermama

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    I do have a type, a beautiful smile, and a friendly face does it for me. I’m not sexually attracted to many people, but when I have a crush on someone it’s full on!
     
  18. tallslenderguy

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    Oh cool, great discussion, thanks for starting it Red1.
    For me, it is more of a vibe than a look, though looks can definitely figure into the equation. i identify as "gay total bottom with some sub" and every word has some pretty involved definition for me. i don't think any of us are boiler plate though, we're all individuals with some similarities instead of vice versa?
    i'm 6'5," and i do not come off as "fem," no stereotypical fem 'affectations.' i do think i had those attributes as a little kid. i can look back at when i was 6 or 7 and see how fem i was. i played with dolls, was very conscious about my appearance and clothes. One halloween i found a wig and put it on, i think i was maybe 7 or 8? and went trick or treating as a girl, none of my neighbors recognized me as the boy next door, and i was acting very 'fem.' When i got home, my dad got really angry at me, told me never to do that again. i started building my 'closet' early on and hiding my attraction to boys was just part of that, i learned how to 'be a boy.'
    i also attracted bullies when i was a kid, like bees to pollen. Retrospectively i can see how a lot of the Boys i attracted as bullies may very well have been gay and dom, but just didn't know what to do with it? Sort of like the hetero school yard crush where a boy likes a girl, so he hits or kicks her. haha, go figure?
    By the time i hit age 14, my closet was built and i'd grown to 6'4", so i didn't have bullies anymore, but i wasn't masculine as a response, i was just hidden and sort of neutered. i knew of my attraction to boys up to that point, but didn't have a word for it, or really acknowledge it cognitively, but knew it very well emotionally. At 14 i also had my first wet dream. If sort of shocked me, because at 14 i knew and acknowledged to myself that i had 'homosexual feelings."

    The dream was of a boy i barely knew, but pretty much nailed my "type" like only an unleashed subconscious can do? He was a sweet, kind boy with beautiful brown eyes, and i'm not kidding here, his name was "Randy Lay." Doesn't get much more appropriate haha. In the dream he walked up to me in the school hallway and looked me in the eyes and gave me a deep kiss. i woke up totally wet and simultaneously excited and distraught. i had also started down the religious path of trying to resist being gay, and here it was coming out in my dreams.

    On paper (or online), if a Guy identifies as Gay Total Top... He has my attention. If "Dom" is thrown in, He has my cautious attention. Physical appearance? Can be just about any, it's more the vibe i feel from Him. Force, bullies, big ego, are a turn off... i run the other direction. Openness, vulnerability, communicative? Opens me right up. A Guy Who is open about His desires/needs as a Top is like He has His fingers on all my buttons and my emotions of reciprocal desire/need are evoked. There is an element of power and control with the Dom/sub thing that can happen, but that takes some pretty specific chemistry. To me, openness and vulnerability are much more "Dom" than the force or arrogance that often passes as 'dom.' The difference is i see submission as something i give, not something that is forced or taken. So a 'type' Who recognizes and wants the kind of effect and position He can have with me is... captivating.
     
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  19. JT1999

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    :point_up:

    That's a very good way of describing it.
     
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  20. Altanero

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    Such an interesting topic!

    I'm in a similar situation, tallslenderguy... However, I've never identified myself as feminine, but neither masculine. Well, if I have to label myself, i suppose I'm more "cis homosexual", as I've grown up in a heterosexual environment and manly attitudes, but I didn't fit in all of them, and I've always tried to build my own space, with some "manly things" and other "sensible things".

    But also, I've noticed something... My first relationship was with a boy who was younger than me. I was 17, he was 14-15. We always felt that I had the role of the elder one, and sexually I had to be the top... but, in fact, my attitude was always "submissive", as he was more secure about his sexuality, he showed it in public (I couldn't back then), and I felt safe with him. I needed a man as a reference point in my life: for familiar reasons, there was a lack of father figure for me that I think I've tried to fill with other men.

    The same happened with my best friend. We both have the same age, but he showed himself so confident and sure that it instantly attracted me. I needed him as my support.

    And now I'm "dating" a younger guy, and I'm starting to feel the same... the feeling of being "the elder", but I know I'll instantly play the role of "submissive" when I had the chance to. Because that makes me feel safe and protected.
     
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