Sorry if this is TMI but once again, had intercourse with a girl last night and felt extremely turned on and horny as usual until i ejaculated. I instantly felt guilt and depressed which then brought on my never ending questioning of sexuality. Been non stop questioning for 3 years now so I'm thinking its very unlikely its just a phase. The other week I attempted to tell a girl-friend that i'm bisexual but i flaked out because idk how i'd even explain myself. Idk what i even am for gods sake. How do i explain that gay porn brought on my instant panic attack and made me start questioning? i feel like i have no interest when it comes to real life but am i just suppressing it....ugh wtf!
Well it certainly sounds like anxiety is driving a lot of your fears. What makes you think you're gay without using porn? Being extremely turned on from sex with a girl isn't something a gay person would say. It'd be more common for bisexuals and certainly widely known in straight individual.
I suggest try out some 'gay stuff', if you will, like fantasizing about guys and maybe masturbate at the same time and see how it makes you feel; if it rocks your boat, you are likely bi in some way. Also, just one question, I want to rule something out: Do you always/very often feel depressed after an orgasm, even if you masturbate?