This may be a bit off topic this doesn't really have to do with "coming out." Or that I'm still not sure about that and even if I were I wouldn't need to tell my family about it. This is about people who are atheist or who are questioning the existence of god or a "higher power." I took down some of my bible stuff from out my dorm and my mom came to visit and notice asking me why'd you take it down. I kind didn't want to answer her so I just shrugged. She started asking me like 20 questions like ."What are you trying to say?" I was like "What do you think?" And she says are you saying you're an atheist?" I said "No, I didn't say that at all." Of course by then she's caring on saying "If you're an atheist I want you to say it to my face." I didn't say anything, then she was going on about how when I die god's going to send me to hell and all this other crap. The thing is I'm not sure if I'm atheist or what I am, I don't know if there's a god or not. And I don't know why she cares so much since she hasn't been to church in the passed 10 years or so now. Keeps saying "She's look for one." And she's never even read the entire bible. I don't get what her problem is...or why she's freaking out over something I never said I was. It kind of hurts a little...I didn't want to tell her any of this because she always shuts it down doesn't want to listen she's just...I don't know it's as if she's so scared to question what's she been taught.... The whole bible thing doesn't make sense to me. And it's weird a lot of Christians I used to go to church with were afraid to die...even my mother is afraid to die and talk about death. Seems like she has doubts but is too afraid to admit it. I mean if I believe there was an actual higher power that was taking care of me I wouldn't be afraid...or maybe I would I don't know. if I were to talk to her about this she will say "You read too many things online." Or "You're just repeating what someone else said." It's annoying really, growing up she wouldn't allow me say things like "oh my god, or I swear to god." :icon_bigg For a moment there I was afraid too scared of burning in hell or getting struck by lightening...then I realize nothing ever happened...didn't make a difference. She was like "I can't believe this, I didn't raise you this way." Seriously, I felt like I was in a lifetime movie or something...I didn't expect her to react this way. Imagine if I told her I was dating another girl? (which I'm not right now but...) :icon_bigg That should be fun... Anyways...any of you guys have semi or really religious parents or family who bug you about it?
I think I am more religious than my parents are/were actually. It sounds like your mom takes religion a bit too seriously though, even though she isn't affiliated to any particular denomination. It's okay to doubt actually. Even as a Christian, I have my fair share of doubts, especially about the Bible, and that's totally okay. The sky will not crack open and earth will not stop turning because I or you have doubts. Your mom needs to chill out.
(*hug*) I was raised Catholic. My mom isn't quite as religious as the rest of my family, but she still is. I wasn't allowed to say "Oh my God" growing up either. A while back she even yelled at me for saying "Goddamn." Every year my grandpa asks me to come to midnight mass on Christmas with the family. Every year I say no and he huffs at me and gets all angry. My uncle once scolded me because in college I went to a non-denominational church service with some friends. It's normal to have doubts and you should be free to explore them. It's up to you to figure out what religion means to your life--if anything. I tell most people I'm Catholic just because it's easier, but in practice I'm some combination of Catholic, Christian, and agnostic.
Religion is afunny thing. And religion can be different things to different people. And its not always healthy. "And I don't know why she cares so much since she hasn't been to church in the passed 10 years or so now. Keeps saying "She's look for one." And she's never even read the entire bible. I don't get what her problem is...or why she's freaking out over something I never said I was." Some times for some people religion can be like an "insurance policy", or like an "authority figure". And maybe even if you study the religion itself it will tell you "we are niether", but some people will always try and make it. I can't tell you how many times people quote, even to my face, when i ask them why they think there is something in the bible against homosexuality: "it says a man must not sleep with a man, and a woman must not sleep with a woman" which of course it never said. And I boggle. Because they are trying to refer to the old testatment, and the old testament never says anything against lesbian. At all. ever what they are trying to use, to justify their bullshit, (pure bullshit mind you), is "a man must not sleep with another man as his wife, it is an abomination" and the hebrew word for abomination here means "idolatry" and this is taken out of context of a passage in the bible about pagan worship, and its referring to pagan fertility rituals where temple prostitutes had anal sex with men, where a man would plant his "seed" in a temple prostitute to "bring fertility" from "fertility gods". (sleep with another man as his wife actually means anal sex). Go ahead and look it up . Passage b efore it is about the God Moloch, and after it is ab out the Canaanites. The whole thing was a warning to not be like the egyptians, that God and moses was leading the jews away from, nor to be like the canaanites, where the jews where being lead to. Seriously And they can't get it right at any level. In fact they can't even quote the words out of the b ible properly, or even close, or even in a way that would make sense t their argument. this is how bad people are with religion. ".I don't know it's as if she's so scared to question what's she been taught...." bingo. very possible. something like this, surely for me - the best cure for this was to learn the system, and beat them at their own game. Study religion and stuff like the bible It made me feel much better. By the way, you may find the term "agnostic" more fitting for you than atheist. Certainly Questioning religion is very important. Skepticism is healthy , as is doubt. Martin Luther was one of the greatest contributers to Christian history and the Christian church. You would be amazed to hear him speak of all his doubts Its very normal for young people to feel the way you do, especially when they don't know much about religion / religions, and have not been taught much. I highly encourage you to educate yourself thoroughly, and pursue your questions while you are questioning Feel free to contact me anytime if you wish about this I don't have PMs set up but you can always drop a line on my wall or something. Take care! (*hug*) Yet look how tightly they cling to it - no matter how far off they are from it. They just USE religion to make them feel better. like a DRUG or pain killer.
Doubts are healthy! You are not alone. I'm so sorry your mom responded so poorly. Thinking about you.
