could thinking I'm trans be a cover up

Could it be that you're just more comfortable because you feel like you're being more honest with yourself, as well as wih others?

I know that after I came out to my boyfriend, and he handled it surprisingly well, I felt a lot more comfortable with our relationship. I mean I understand that he is a straight guy, and this likely won't be a forever thing, but he's trying anyway, and I appreciate the effort. The fact is that right now, I feel more like me. I feel like he's trying to see me for me, where he used to see me as a girl, which put pressure on me to be the girl he thought he had. I often have thoughts somewhat similar to yours - maybe I'm just using the label to try and fit in on the LGBT spectrum, since I'd otherwise be a straight woman. Which is silly, because if I was a straight woman, why would I be so willing to jump through hoops to be a gay man? Looking back, I was never insistant about my gender, but I have felt off for a really long time, and I never really accepted that I was the gender that was designated to me.

Honestly, I don't think it's a cover up. If you spent any amount of time questioning your gender, and ended up coming to the conclusion that you do not feel female, then it's likely that you're trans. Least that's how I see it.

 

I agree with clockwork fox

For a while I thought the same and so did my therapist but then I realised that it wasn't a cover up. I found that I actually couldn't be attracted to women as a woman myself. It made me feel very uncomfortable, as did the idea of a lesbian relationship. I came to realise that it wasn't my orientation that was causing me discomfort and angst but my gender.

If you feel more comfortable as a trans guy, I would take that as a sign that it's not a cover up and you are transgender. That's just from my personal experience.

 

I'd say that is spot on. After sorta accepting yourself... well I'll use me as an example.
As a guy I had low confidence, depression, social anxiety, isolation, suicidal tenancies... but now that I am a woman, I have become my own Yin to my Yang.

it's common to have doubts starting out on this road, as it is a long and arduous one... I would explore it abit more, and see what you feel comfortable with

 

I know how that goes. my wife had me as aa guy for 8 years. I came out trans to her, and after a long bout, she finally showed me that she can, and does, accept me for me. And I've finally determined that, with the shift, I won't need hrt. She still, now, is treating me like a lady. Outside, and even in the bedroom. I'm pleased, and we can finally get on with our life together. Honesty in any relationship is paramount. All the best! Emma
(!)
Here's a dancing banana!

 

I can identify with what was said by the others. Before I was able to admit who I am, I was plauged with tons of negativity. Quite frankly I'm a little amazed that I was able to even get out of bed in the morning. Since that fateful day not too long ago, there has been almost a complete about face in how I think and feel. I'm more hopeful about the future and confident in myself. I now also feel a bit better about my attraction to men. Don't get me wrong, I was fine about it before, but at the same time the gay label didn't really seem to fit quite right. For some reason I just couldn't picture myself being in a long term relationship with a man. I thought that maybe it was just social conditioning, which can be particularly strong in such a conservative state. However, after several years I still couldn't see it. Now that I am seeing myself more as a woman instead of a man, I have no problem seeing myself spending my life with a man.

It could be that you are using a label just as a cover up, but then again it could be the other way around. If you want to come to the truth, you have to be honest with yourself.

 

I have the same problem because I don't want to being in a relationship with a lesbian girl because I'm not lesbian! I hate this word on me :dry: Sometimes, I use the word "gay" but it makes me feel dysphoric, unconfortable, and every single time I use this word, I think by instinct "What are you saying? You know very well you are a straight dude..."

My dream is being in a relationship with a girl who's pansexual...but I know it's not simple to find one.

 

"As a guy I had low confidence, depression, social anxiety, isolation, suicidal tenancies... but now that I am a woman, I have become my own Yin to my Yang."

I can completely relate, though I've taken a different stance. I'm actually a hell of a lot more female. And my wife is accepting that. But physically, I'll remain as I am. Reason being, she is the only person (aside from myself) whose opinion I really give a damn about. She accepts me being submissive, did so from the time she asked me to marry her and I said yes! So now, I'll accept what I look like s she accepts me for me.