Hey all, it's been a minute since I've posted on here so stick with me and i'll eventually get my point across, word of warning this post will be long and i'm sorry for it. Over the past few months I've been considering coming out to my grandparents but I have no idea how to do it. I'm out to all friends and family, with the exception of my aunty and uncle who I don't see and my grandparents. I had originally planned on telling one of my grandads firs as I'm pretty sure he'd be okay with it but he sadly passed away a little over a month ago and i'm now left deciding on who I will tell first. Neither set of grandparents are overly religious but two of them have made some sort of homophobic remark at one point or another. My mum's parents can be quite stuck up at times and have a general view on "the right way" of life etc. There has only been a handful of times where I've heard my grandad mention something homophobic (1. seeing two women who were obviously a couple, having lunch and saying something a little rude about it not being 'right' and 2. mentioning something again a little rude about legalising gay marriage in our country) each time my nan has spoken up and said that he shouldn't say this and not everyone lives their lives the way he would like them too. Since then they've lived next to two older women who are married and seem to get along fine (no homophobic slurs of any kind and overall acceptance) this gives me the impression that they'd be more or less okay with me being lesbian, maybe with some hesitance at first but over time it would become 'normal'. My dad's parents have also expressed some sort of homophobic opinion or view on certain topics, as my grandad has passed away- I will only need to be telling my grandma who herself- has said that there is "something about a marriage that only a man and woman should enter in to" she wasn't exactly rude about it and never said anything about same sex relationships in general (just marriage) i'm quite close to my grandma so i'm fairly certain that she would be okay with or grow to the idea of her granddaughter being gay. I feel as though coming out to each set of grandparents wouldn't alter our relationships too much but I can't seem to shake the "what if" thoughts, what if they aren't okay with it, what if they stop talking to me, what if it changes theway they see my parents. Now, as a naturally awkward person I have a hard time finding the words when I need to have a serious conversation and generally try to add humor (which would not necessarily work in this situation) I act awkwardly and try to beat around the bush instead of getting straight to the point. How would I go about bringing this up to them? I would need to speak to speak to my grandma on my dad's side in person or i could possibly write a letter to her (if that's a good idea?) I could e-mail my grandparents on mum's side but again i'm conflicted as I feel like it's a conversation to havein person regardless of how awkward and uncomfortable I am. To finish this post off i'd first like to say thank you if you got this far and sorry for it being so long, my overall questions would be: - Would E-mailing be an appropriate way to come out to my grandparents? if so, what do I say (side note: if I e-mail i'm sure that i'd get one back and if notit'd be a phone call- how do I act normal and not let on that i'm uncomfortable?) - If I were to write to my grandma what would I put in the letter? - If I muster up the courage to speak to them in person how do I go about bringing it up and actually telling them? - Once I've told them (if in person) is there any way I can avoid the awkwardness and carry on as usual? Once again, i'm really sorry. Thank you.
