I don't know how much more of this I can take really..I am cold..Just cold inside... I don't want to keep myself a "secret" anymore even though my parents want ME a big secret....... I feel fake pretending to be a boy and that is what hurts the most..idk what to do
They get all mad..They kicked me out of the house once for trying to tell the family.. They think it may be be a "phase" or something.. They also think its a sin.......
I have had to reconcile with a long separation from my family after coming out. My Mother and Brother wanted a macho type for a son and brother, but that made me feel more feminine, with more cross dressing, and transvestitism. I believe gays and lesbians have a very strong relationship to individuality and self expression. My Mothers only advice amidst conflicting views was don't let yourself get too suicidal. I believe gays to have a very special treatment of their privacy when faced with homophobia within their family, but separation from them in order to experience adulthood and maturity is the cross roads we all must face.
It's always hard to find acceptance in this society. Pretending to be something you aren't is difficult, but even if you have to now, at some point you'll be free to be who you are. I promise things will get better. Life is hard sometimes. Maybe your parents will accept you someday, maybe they won't. But you'll find friends, maybe a partner, and things will get better.