Can somebody explain the reasoning behind this type of response?

Ya, I don't remember exactly how I found it, I think it's because the site hosts a lot of quizzes (like "what kind of gay guy are you?" quizzes) and after you'd take them it'd say to sign up for their free dating site. The site was founded by Harvard students and it's also been used to derive a lot of data about how people interact and date, both gay and straight.

But in my experience people actually message and have real conversations, rather than just the usual one-line garbage that goes on on the apps.

Like jsmurf, I have never had any luck with those hookup apps. I've been on them a few times while drunk and embarrassed myself when I looked back at what I had said the next day. Good for fun, but not for relationships. If you just want a quick hookup like the guy in the OP did, then it's fine, but if you're expecting something more, like jsmurf did, you're going to end up disappointed.

I was sceptical of any dating site being worthwhile, but the place I'm on now really seems different. Within a short time after joining I had cute, nice, unique guys message me, actually interested in getting to know me and talk about interests, hobbies, life goals, feelings, etc., without any pressure to go hookup and have sex. Way better experience in my opinion.

 

Ignoring all of the possible explanations of what the guys intentions were(Because none of us can rightfully know.), I feel that the overall moral to the story is to be a little bit more cautious if a simple hookup isnt quite what you are looking for. More importantly, Jsmurf, stop being so hard on yourself!!

Low confidence always leads to low expectations, whether it is conscious or unconscious. From what I have gathered it doesnt seem like your appearance is very much like the men you tend to feel attracted to, but it is because of this that you have to remind yourself that you are baised. Most people are. No one feels as attracted to themselves as they can to others, so if we continue to weigh ourselfs on the same scale we will always be the ones to come up short. We all come in different shapes, colors, and sizes and the majority of us wont fall into the generic mold of "attraction". You are an intelligent and handsome guy, and you should not be awestruck of someone else showing interest in you. (*hug*)

 

Honestly, who knows? There is a change for anything. My opinion; I'm all for people changing and redeeming themselves, but at this point I dont think you should care so much. Even if he suddenly shows up again I wouldnt be so welcoming. Where has he been since this happened? Had he not have stopped responding after, he could have made the argument that he just "got into the moment" like you did. But now it doesnt seem likely that he was looking for anything more than a hookup and it seems as though that relationship would do more harm than good.

 

Forget about this guy, Gen is right that even if he were to message you again you shouldn't just eagerly welcome him back, lest he take advantage of you again. Then he'd think you're just desperate and an easy target.

Anyway, the dating site I was talking about does the bear the name of a Roman god...if you think that your profile is too nerdy, then other people might think the same thing, and that's why they don't respond to you...your profile should exude confidence...you've gotta figure out how to market yourself, like a salesman, to get people to buy what you're selling...:icon_wink

 

I didn't take much time either because I also hate writing profiles...but you have to do it or else nobody will want to respond to someone who's too lazy to write one, or possibly hiding something. There's just a few sections, put a brief paragraph under each one, it's a one-time thing... like Ron Popeil would say, set it and forget it.