Seriously, I am 50 now and have always been in groups that include the vast variety of human sexuality. So I really don't know. I was married for 15 years, have 3 kids, and I did really love him most of the time (always some issues). But I haven't been attracted to anyone for a long time. I am also very empathic, so I am realizing how much of my life is feeling what others expect of me. When I think about men there seems to be some power as part of it, I want them to be attracted to me and then I can be attracted to them. The few dates I have had I have had no urge to kiss them or go any further, but I don't feel much connection to my sexuality in general. Meanwhile the last few mild attractions I have had have been with men, so I feel I am definitely more attracted to people than gender. I have always been attracted to gay men for example, doesn't really help dating! The thing that had me starting to consider this was that there is a family at the summer camp I run that is 2 moms. There are also people in their community that come pick up the kiddos, lately I have found myself really wanting to talk to a young woman and actually less self conscious than talking to men. I watch movies with same sex couples and just find it adorable, not weird at all, So what do people do if they are not sure? I don't want to put someone through trying to date when I really don't know, seems dishonest. I have a few friends that are bisexual, were married to a man and then to a woman, that I can ask some advice of. However just considering this and making it part of my identity has relaxed me in a way I haven't felt in a long time.
Hi, I am about your age, a guy who 'thought' he was straight his whole life but now I realize it was just denial...I am having a great deal of difficulty accepting I am gay, but I know I am... well, how about 'a date'? you say you're attracted to people more than gender, why not just go off that?