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Butch and Femme Lesbians!!

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by RueBea85, Jan 8, 2013.

  1. RueBea85

    RueBea85 Guest

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    I'm Canadian eh?
    1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?
    2) Being a butch lesbian, or seen as being a butch lesbian, do you feel pressure to fill a more "masculine" role in your relationships?
    3) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?

    4) I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?
    5) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?
    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?

    I was just curious to know some of your answers!
     
  2. Mackattack

    Mackattack Guest

    Let's see.. "Do I identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?"--I am SO more of a butch lesbian! (which is funny because I'm usually more attracted to the butch ones too. lol)
    "Do I feel pressure to fill a more "masculine" role in my relationships?"-- Yes. Sometimes.

    "In my every day life? From others?" No not really. :slight_smile:

    I don't know what I like most about being butch, but it really does describe me though, like for the longest time I didn't think I was really a butch but looking back and thinking about it, it's so obvious now to me! lol.
     
  3. Lux

    Lux
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    1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?

    Leaning toward fem, although I'm very sporty so perhaps a "butchier fem." I always wear form fitting clothing, am a big fan of yoga pants, am partial to earrings and whatnot but on the other hand I wear my hair up most of the time so I definitely am a bit of a tomboy.

    3) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?

    No pressure--I feel like I have a pretty understated phenotype so I'm not categorized beyond being sporty.

    4) I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?

    I've been in a relationship with two girls--one who was super feminine and (my current) who is pretty similar to me on the spectrum. I don't feel much pressure to fill a roll, beyond trying to figure out where we are--between being friends and being more than friends.

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?

    I have a friend who was able to quickly identify me as gay--mostly because she has an amazing gaydar and saw me after sport's practice so. Still I was aggravated that someone else could read my personal life by how I looked at the moment. I don't like the way I appear to be directly correlated with the side of me I consider most personal.

    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?

    I like the freedom that I find in being able to dress mostly normally. I would never consider myself a girly girl, but I definitely feel very in touch with being a girl and dressing moderately girly when I want to. I'm perceived the way I am--sporty, funny, a little bit preppy sometimes--and I appreciate that normally I can pass as ambiguous.
     
  4. Anthemic

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    Q: Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?
    A: I'm more femme than butch. But I can also be sporty.

    Q: I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?
    A: I never feel pressured since this is what I prefer. I prefer to take the feminine role in a relationship. Even though I am attracted to other femme lesbians, I still prefer them to be less femme than me. But I'm also attracted to soft butch and androgynous lesbians.

    Q: What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?
    A: A little bit. But usually only from my mother. She sometimes pressures me to wear make-up when we go out, and sometimes I just don't feel like it. Even though I love dressing up, sometimes I would just rather wear my jog pants, and my mom always says, "You're going like that?"

    Q: What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?
    A: People tend to think I'm straight. While this is ok in some situations, it does kinda bother me when it comes to other lesbians. Since I never pursue anyone I'm interested in, I feel like I'll never meet anyone because people think I'm straight. :dry:

    Q: What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?
    A: I like being femme because that's who I am. I'm extremely in touch with my feminine side. I also like being femme because it makes my family think I'm straight.
     
  5. 1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?
    femme i would say.


    4) I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?
    no not at all. i fill a role of being a girlfriend, thats the only role i would fill. i am genrally more submissive but yet can be the opposite in situations. i dont see the feminine and masculine roles at all :s

    5) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?
    no....

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?
    the comments i get mainly 'youre too pretty to be gay' or 'no... are you sure?' and lesbians who dont believe im a lesbian. awkward :icon_sad:

    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?
    i like skirts and makeup but not obsessed. i just like being me. my label is femme if i do label, but that isnt what i would label myself in everyday life tho... im just little 'ol me who just wears skirts e.t.c ^-^
     
  6. IrisM

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    1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?

    I'm very comfortable with being femme.

    2) Being a butch lesbian, or seen as being a butch lesbian, do you feel pressure to fill a more "masculine" role in your relationships?

    N/A

    3) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?

    N/A

    4) I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you
    feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?

    I'm actually where I feel the most comfortable, being femme.

    5) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?

    Actually, sometimes other transpeople sometimes put a little pressure on me to be less femme because it's viewed as validating the Binary. I think they'll get it sometime, we are all only ourselves.

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?

    This list could be quite long, but I've learned to distance myself from such things.

    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?

    It's just nice to be myself, though the shoes and outfits help.
     
  7. RueBea85

    RueBea85 Guest

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    Thanks for the answers so far, it's always interesting to see how others feel! It got me thinking because one of my friends said that because I looked more butch I would want someone who is more femme and I would be the "man" in the relationship. It's kind of annoying when people just assume but I guess that will always happen.
     
  8. branana

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    1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?
    Femme, definitely. :3

    4) I wanted to ask the same thing for femmes, or lesbians seen as being femme, do you feel pressure to fill a more "feminine" role?
    I am usually the more feminine one, but that's mainly because I'm attracted to girls that are more on the butch side. So it's not really a pressure sort of thing, it's just me.

    5) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?
    Nah. :3

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?
    I have to tell people I am gay, and even then most of them don't believe me. I often get told that I 'don't look like a lesbian', which is funny, because we don't all look the same. :3

    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?
    I like the freedom to be as girly as I want. :slight_smile: I'm very feminine and girly in a childish sort of way sometimes. :3
     
  9. Maddy

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    1) Do you identify as a butch lesbian or more on the femme side?
    I'm a tomboy, but not particularly butch.

    2) Being a butch lesbian, or seen as being a butch lesbian, do you feel pressure to fill a more "masculine" role in your relationships?
    I feel like I sort of take on the "masculine" role because that's ust me, but I don't feel pressure to do so.

    3) What about in your everyday life? Do you feel pressure from others?
    I feel like I should either be butch or femme, and fill one role or the other. The lesbian scene where I live seems to be very much butch-femme.

    6) What are some things that bother you the most about the way that people perceive you?
    I'm seen as a plain-looking chubby nerd who's not femme enough to be attractive to those who like femmes or butch enough for those who like butches.

    7) What do you like the most about being butch/femme? Or being perceived that way?
    I don't like being stuck in the middle like I am.