I was diagnosed with paranoid traits of personality . I think I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, because I have allucinations and paranoid ideas about the others hurting me and killing me. I think that everyone out there is homophobe and just wants to hurt me. As I child, I was neglected by my family. I was said I was way too frail. But actually I was not the one who was fauly. I was told I was an ugly gay, that I was a looser and so. I received emotional abuse by my sister. I couldn't stand her telling me how looser I was, just because I was good at school. I wold cry every day. I think that my sexuality shouldn't be exposed. I think I am ugly and I will never find a boyfriend, even if I came out to someone. is there someone who is gay and has paranoid schizophrenia?