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Bad Weekend

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by IamCasey, Oct 3, 2016.

  1. IamCasey

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    Spent the weekend at my Dad's with his new wife and her kids. Her son is 15 and he and I have to share a room. Saturday night his Mom would not let him go out with friends because I was not invited to go. I did not want to go in the first place. And I told her so. So Dad got a bit pissed at me for talking to her like that.

    Her son and I were in our room getting ready for bed and suddenly he threw a pillow at me and told me to keep my faggot eyes off him. I had my back to him. He got loud and that brought Dad up to our room. Dad told us to stop yelling ( I wasn't saying anything) He listened to both sides and said that maybe I should sleep on the couch. I grabbed my blanket and pillow and went downstairs, mad, feeling absolutely betrayed. Dad came in and said that things will be better in the morning.

    It wasn't. I was called a faggot again and then I told Dad I would not be back and wanted to take my things. Without an argument, he helped me load my things and took me home. On the way home he said that I was acting childish and said that I needed to man up. To ignore the name calling. That things would calm own. And I could move my things back in. I was so mad I told my Dad that he did not back me, not once,, that he took his new son's side. And that I would never go back there again. That if he wanted to see me, it had to be him and him alone. That it was his fault for telling his new wife. I know she told her son. She had to.

    Mom says I will calm down and we can work things out. I do not think so. I really don't care anymore!

    Should I have stayed and taken his new son's lies and abusive words? Just to be with my Dad? My big bro agrees with me?
     
  2. Quantumreality

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    Hi IamCasey,

    Sorry you had such a bad experience. It sounds like your Dad's stepson was being an a**. It may be that he was upset because he didn't get to go out with his friends and took it out on you, but that's no reason for him to have said those things to you. And, IMO, your Dad really should have backed you up a put his new stepson in his place for making such unacceptable slurs against you.

    I don't know how your family dynamic work, but you might want to try putting your foot down and telling your Dad that you won't spend time with him at that house unless he lays down the law about his new stepson discriminating against you like that.

    But don't do that if it will only get you in trouble. However, from what you wrote, it sounds like your brother is willing to back you on this and if he says something to your parents, as well about how unfair and emotionally traumatizing it is to you, maybe they will start to listen? I'm asking more than advising since, like I said, I don't really know how your family dynamic works.

    Best of luck!:slight_smile:
     
  3. TheChainedPegasus

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    Ugh, immature as a fifteen yo. What is worse than that ?

    Don't take what he said personnally, he's not worth it. Why ? Because you are 13 and he's 15, you're mature, not him.

    For your dad, as QuantumReality said, try to make your big brother talk to him, or you could be WITH him.

    Your dad acted really bad, I mean, making you sleep on the couch, even if you're alone, it's just not right if you have a bed to sleep on. And not backing you was a BIG mistake, try to talk with him about what he did.

    Good luck and stay strong !
     
  4. 3n

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    Personally the word "faggot" doesn't bother me much (it used to be a HUGE trigger word for me though), but I think you made the right choice. Living in a homophobic environment like that isn't fun and most importantly isn't safe.