Ok so I'm young, 17 and will be 18. sweet. Starting uni, so my life is pretty sweet. Expet I really think I'm gay, almost every day I have fantasies about Men and generally look at porn once a day. It's really insane because I can never admit that I am gay to anyone, I just shudder at the thought of the way my friends, my father, my grandparents, my siblings would all look at me or treat me. I keep telling myself that it's ok and I can just ignore it, that I will find a girl and get married etc... But girls don't even help me anymore. Ahh! I have no idea what to do
Well - you're at least in the right place. This is a great place to work through those kind of questions. So consider step one accomplished. Recognizing that you're possibly gay is another great step. I wish I'd had the insight and honesty to consider that possibility when I was younger. It isn't likely going to 'go away'. Accepting this fact might take you a while. Once you're comfortable with the concept of being gay, and have accepted it yourself, you'll be amazed at how much better you feel about yourself. It won't seem quite so scary to consider coming out to friends and family. Just give yourself permission to take the time to get used to the idea. Going to university may be a great opportunity to explore this side of yourself in a new environment with new friends, and likely in a more liberal and accepting environment. Your university will likely have clubs or support organizations for gays and lesbians, so it might be something you'll want to check out. Again - welcome to EC. It really helped me through that 'accepting' phase. I hope it does the same for you.
You are in the right place, and it just takes time. Like Jim said, you might look for clubs or organizations on your campus, something like a GSA maybe. Meeting other people and talking to others helps. I did a lot of reading, and that helped me. Time mostly, and even when I accepted it, I spent a lot of time thinking that anyone who looked at me knew. It took a lot of time before I could come out to anyone, and the first time was the most nerve wracking thing I've ever done, even though I knew my friend would be accepting.
Like everyone else said this is the right place and y]i guess you have to accept that your gay and live with it. Like i was watching this show "God Squad" and this little girl asked why was her sister in a wheel chair and she and her brother were not?, THE PRIEST SAID "God gives us all hard things and blessings we must take the blessings and be thankful for them and learn to live with the hard things and overcomethem" I looked at me being gay a hard thing a couple of weeks ago but now its a blessing and i thank god for it. Hope this helps =D
hey dont worry about a thing, ur at the right place and here ull b surrounded by ppl tht have gone through exactly what u have and there all gona want 2 b offerin u advice =] and time will b a major factor in ur accepting and then coming out pm me if ya wish but i fink there wud b others with better experience thn me in this subject seein as my coming out was years ago and easy =]
it sounds like you are coming out to your self. Every gay person goes through this (except those who supress it their whole lives), and once you do, you will feel alot more confident about yourself and it will be easier to tell other people. But you should be sure about your self before telling other people. Anyway, good luck!
