Anyone else struggle with feelings of routine self-loathing?

Yeah I struggle with it ALOT.

Unfortunately, I am extremely unattractive and it gets me down everyday. I don't even look in the mirror anymore, because I know it will just make me feel worse about myself.

Is it normal? Don't know.

 

I hear you. I have a problem of my own... *is embarrased* well, it has to do with being trans and ahem, masturbation and stuff... it's like I don't want to because I'll feel like shit quite often, and it really makes my self esteem just plummet because it makes me feel weak and unwomanly. So yeah, you're not alone.
And I think you look good, btw.

 

I share this trait, unfortunately.

I've literally went out of my way to cover mirrors. Ugh.

 

I lost about 60 pounds four years ago. Went from around 220 lbs (and I'm 5'4, mind you) to around 150 at my lowest. I'm about 160 now, but in much better shape since I took up boxing. What's weird to me is I never felt overweight when I was, but now that I am in pretty good shape, I often feel like I'm not.

I think one of he reasons I love boxing is because my confidence is way up when I box. I feel like I'm good at it, and I've been told that I move well, and that I hit hard enough to earn respect from anybody who gets in the ring to spar with me. That respect isn't something I assume I get in everyday life from people. But when I put on a pair of boxing gloves, it's a whole different world.

 

I feel you. I used to weigh 350lbs and now I weigh about 220. But I look like I weigh 180.

Even though I lost a lot of weight and look a lot better than before, I still feel ugly and fat. The only difference is now I get more attention and where I could get away with certain things because no one noticed me before people notice me and stare at me everywhere I go now.

But because of my mental conditioning I feel like they are looking at me for being bad or something. I still fee like a fat ugly kid nobody likes so when someone I find attractive tries to get my attention, I immediately focus on what I'm doing wrong and totally miss out on the chance to meet somebody.

I think you may also be doing something similar. Maybe what we need is some positive assurance from a peer. We've been despised and degraded by others too long that we cannot realize our self worth. But we must realize it ourself that's why it's self-worth.

(!)(*hug*)

 

Well I'll tell you outright you are one of my favorite people on here. Your posts are positive and reassuring and so full of caring. You are a bright light to many on here.
And you better damn well accept those compliments

 

I know it is hard and I get down A TON about my looks and body, I listen to depressing music when I am down and I bottle up so many emotions. So I literally get in my car and drive around and listen to bomb ass music, sing with the windows down and just enjoy the ride.. There is someone out there that will love you and your body no matter what.. and if you feel like eating right and going to the gym one day then great and if you want to sit at home and eat junk food and watch netflix then fucking do it.. I promise you personality go a long way!! But like I said not everyone is looking for the hot model they throw on tv and magazines. Try and stay positive, I know all too well how hard it can be sometimes.

 

I would suggest talking with a therapist but be very weary before taking any pills they give you. The pill makers write the books on treating illnesses. With that said:

I say you should speak to a therapist because based on what you've told me you're really in a self hating loop. Probably originating in some prior trauma. It seems that way because you are willing to take complaints from a complete stranger and trust a complete stranger over someone you have built a bond and rapport with. This is dangerous.

Next time you decide to trust a complete stranger remember that people can have alterior motives and with familiar people it's easier to detect when they're acting fishy. It's difficult to detect ill will ib a stranger with compliments.

 

Ummm I get what you are going through right now. I too, as a child have suffered from weight issues, the only way I used to cope with it was to study, and study a lot.
People around me used to judge others by their academic strenghts so I adapted to it. But ueah the feelings of self loathing did come back and it was worse than ever.
But the simplest way to end these feelings is to surround yourself with people who love you, no matter what, be with reassuring people, those who will appreciate you for who you are.

I say this as one of my greatest friends help me get over these things, and yeah the thing that I noticed is that you imbibe the positivity and strenghts of such people.

So grab a few friends, tell em that you're going through this and it will help, belive me.
Its okay if those friends baby or pamper you, its great actually .

 

My weight has fluctuated in life to. Focus on the likable personality you describe of yours. I loved the few years in my life feeling show off sexy. Years later I feel unattractive but I am who I am. I care about my health but my focus is the love and compassion of a partner not the looks

 

I've actualy always been skinny, but now I'm in the normal healthy zone. I hate that. I feel fat. I used to be close to the line between healthy and unhealthy, which I actualy want to return to. Although some of my bones are actualy quite obvious, I still have a need to be skinnier. Also, I hate how my legs look, and I just find a problem with almost every single part of my body. So yeah, I have a problem with self loathing too.