Any lesbians thought they were bi then later found out their actually lesbian ?

I guess so that it's easier for us to explain ourselves to people. A simple word can tell other people who we like.

 

I can remember liking girls from the second grade on. At 24 I decided I was bisexual & wanted a boyfriend. This was after my girlie magazines were discovered, & I felt ashamed. I started paying more attention to men. I noticed some could be handsome. And with my lack of experience, I didn't trust myself to know I was a lesbian. Reaching 30 without having any relationships, gay marriage becoming legal in my state, & meeting actual lesbians, gave me clarity. I imagine my life with a woman & it feels right in my whole being.

 

Its more degrading than flattering. I dont think Ill ever get used to it. And what is it with mothers treating their gay daughters so horribly!? Im reading more and more cases of it on here. It makes me sad :icon_sad:

I feel the exact same way. Whenever I picture my life in 10-15 years from now I see a woman next to me.

 

stocking, your mom should stop being hurtful. Tell her that from me.

I was "straight" for a while but as I got more into dating women, it seems there may not be a way back for me. I can still get into guys but the connection I have when dating a woman is totally different, and feels better to me than dating a guy ever did. I have so many girl crushes and so few guy crushes, that it's starting to feel more and more like my crushes on dudes in the past have been at least a little fake. I became pretty good at convincing myself that I had a crush on a guy just because I "should".

Also when I was with guys in the past, I felt most attracted by their genitalia, but with women it's the whole body that attracts me, if that makes sense. So I still enjoy both, but with one it's a very specific and one-dimensional attraction whereas to the other its more all-encompassing.

Then again, I say this as I date a girl, but who knows if we break up what I might feel then towards guys.

---------- Post added 29th Jan 2014 at 02:30 PM ----------

Also, I came out at age 24 as bisexual.

 

Well it was never meant to be degrading. I personally prefer 'lesbian' over 'gay', either because it's gender-specific, or more likely, because I hear a lot of people at my school using 'gay' as an insult. As in, "Ew, that's so gay!" when they see something they consider repulsive/gross.

 

I don't know if this counts but.. yeah. I am bi, i like both girls and guys, but i am more attracted to girls. The friends that I am out to call me lesbian and say that i should just call myself lesbian because i have been with a girl for the past 2 years and plan on staying with her many more.

 

There seems to be largely two types of lesbian - those who have always known, and find the idea of being with a man repulsive, and those who wouldn't completely rule out being with a man again, but prefer women as they are attracted to them more.

 

I did. Later I found out I was more in love with the concept of being bisexual.......that didn't mean I was actually bisexual as I soon found out...

 

Thank god "that's so lesbian!" never became a thing... although if it did, I would hope that meant it was a good thing. :icon_bigg

Looks like people are trying to flip it around with "that's so gay": Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

---------- Post added 31st Jan 2014 at 08:14 AM ----------

I've never been repulsed by men. The way I put it to my friends when I came out as bi was that if I ever consider myself gay it's because I prefer to date women, but not to the exclusion of men. It looks like I might be there.

But when you aren't repulsed by men, and are at least somewhat bisexual, it's easy to cover up feelings towards women by calling it normal friendship, because it's like "Look i'm hooking up with a guy so i don't like girls! See how heterosexual I can be??" Ha...

Anyways I think for me that's why it took me so long to come out to myself.

 

I feel like this is what I am going through right now. I am just starting to explore/accept my attraction to women, but my mind keeps telling me that I still like men... Even though I have never truely enjoyed a man romantically/sexually. So, I feel like I am lesbian, but my brain is really trying to convince me to be straight or bi.

 

*raises hand*
I first came out as bi. It was too obvious that I am gay, though, so I was lucky enough not to have to come out a second time. I just accepted it. Everyone I had come out to as bi already knew (or at least never questioned me about the change in label).
I dislike the word lesbian mostly because I don't fully identify as a woman. But yeah, gay is much better.