And that's why I date men

Before I accepted the fact that I was gay, the idea of me always wanting to watch gay porn and always wanting to be with a man made me sick, and made me hate myself, so, naturally, I dated girls in my younger days. I met this girl, let's call her H, when I was in middle school, and we "dated" for quite some time, up until about tenth grade. She then started dating another girl and we drifted apart. I still continued to watch gay porn, though I forced myself to watch straight porn from time to time, praying that it would make me straight, but you can see how well that turned out. Junior year, I decided to join the military, and so I did. H had told me soon after that she wanted to get back with me, which I strongly considered, but declined (there's a whole back story about her being a hoe that I'm not going to get into). So, she decides to go after my best friend, J. I go off to boot camp, and I get all sorts of mail from my parents about H and J, about how good they're doing, how he's working, this, that. I graduate and move on to language school. H calls me up one day and begs me to get back with her because her and J have been having issues. At this point, I have been seeing a therapist to work out some issues I'm having with a sexual assault from my past, and my therapist suggests I accept the fact that I'm gay. So, I tell H that I'm starting to think I'm interested in men and that it can't work out between us, no big deal. A few months go by, and J and H have a baby, and decide to get married. I have only come out to a few close friends in the military, and J and H back home. J asks me to be H's maid of honor during her wedding, which happens to be the same week I return home for break, so I agree, and everything goes smoothly. A week after I return, I get a text from my mom: "son, are you gay?" I was shocked, confused, emotional. I didn't respond for a week, then asked her who she heard that from. She told me H had brought the baby by and that she just came out and said it. Apparently, H was upset that I lied to her about being gay, so decided to tell my mom... even though I was telling the truth. H took a moment I was supposed to share with my parents, good or bad, a moment that will mean something to every person who wants to come out. She took it from me. And I will never, ever get it back. And I'll never forgive her for it.