Am I too obsessed about wanting a boyfriend?

I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting to have someone to share your life with, but you need to be careful that you’re not looking for a good feeling “fix”. What I mean by that is: When we feel down on ourselves we want to feel better, and people go about this different, and sometimes destructive ways. Don’t think that having a boyfriend will someone fix all your problems, and be sure you get into a relationship because YOU want to be in one, and not because you want them to like you with you.
I've fallen into that trap many-a-time

 

A good friend once told me you just have to sit back and let it come to you. Trust me it will come out of nowhere. I was friends with my boyfriend for four years and never really realized we were both gay. After that we tried dating and we get along great.

Just don't worry about it. It will happen when it needs to.

I promise.

 

What he said ^^
I have those feelings from time to time. Having it now actually. But i'm not totally sure what I want due to just really coming to terms with wanting to live my life out of the closet.

 

I'll tell you that coming out will be a big start in finding someone

¬_¬

Obviously

 

>>>Gee thanks like I don't know that one yet...

Sarcasm aside, I'll reassert it.

Actions have consequences. Positive and negative. You realize that coming out might well have some seriously negative repercussions. But it might have some positive ones - to wit, you might get a boyfriend. I'm not trying to push you in either direction, but it seems you have two options:

* Stay in the closet, where it's probably safer, and bide your time until you get to college.
* Come out, deal with the grief that might come your way, and see about getting a boyfriend.

Both options have sucky things attached to them. To which I can only say "Welcome to life."

Lex

 

get a hobby, one involving many people if possible. being social nets you the hooks in people and then you can tug on the ones that tug on you. (oh god... I used a fishing reference... I've gotta stop now)

 

yes you have other issues besides wanting a bf. First I advise you in comming out as in your profile you are out to no one.

 

Well if you want to come out I advise you in comming out to the people you believe is the most accepting first.

 

well perhaps you could join some gay and lesbian youth group close to your area. Or do what I did recently and turn up to a PFLAG meeting. I know where you are as when I was your age I felt everyone would be against it.

 

Before I moved to California, I lived in good 'ol South Dakota. Population: All homophobic rednecks. (No offense)

I felt the same way. There wasn't someone to comfort me. There wasn't a shoulder. There wasn't someone to complete me. There wasn't someone that I could connect to on a mental, or phsyical level.

I moved to Cali.
I got the experiences I wasn't looking for.
People took advantage of me, I got hurt.
Just because I didn't set proper standards or set morals for myself.

My theory is...
In life, only you can make yourself truly happy. After all, it is you that chooses who you want to be with, if not being with someone at all. When you get too eager like I did, you'll find yourself lunging into the wrong arms. You'll get hurt when you look too hard.

A heart can get broken only so many times.
I advise you to be more wise to whom you lend yours to.
You may think being hurt will make you happy being single.
But the truth is, the pain will remain there.
Bad experiences may lead you to change the way you feel about relationships.
Don't be that eager to run into something like that.

I believe the best way to get a relationship is to not look.
You'll least expect it when it happens, and it'll be so worth the while.

Take it easy, Justin

 

Well perhaps you can phone gay and lesbian counselling service. Even if there is no local gay and lesbian phone counselling service in your area you can call one in your state and they may provide information regarding support groups for gays in your area.

 

How did that go? Sorry to derail the thread, but i'm thinking of doing the same and just wondering what the hell goes on, and how it all halps.

PS: dude, let us know how your outing with your brother went! (*hug*)