As a kid, I was always a tomboy. I was always the girl who played with the boys, who acted like a boy, wanted boy toys. I didn't outright dismiss girl toys, but there weren't a lot of girls attracted to the whole Dinky Cars thing like I was, either. Growing up, as a teenager, I thought I was non-gendered. I definitely wasn't a girl and I wasn't a boy either. Hitting adulthood, I thought gender fluid was it. I would shift from more masculine to more feminine depending on if I was hanging out with guys or girls, but in the end of my last relationship, I took a sharp dip into feminine even though my boyfriend was a transwoman and I think that was partially through his manipulation. That if he couldn't present himself as girly, he'd try to present me that way. It's been over two years and now I'm confused again. I feel like being seen as a boy is more correct. I feel like being called "he" is better than "she". There's been so many times where being called "madam", "miss" and whatnot have felt and sounded so weird. But I don't ever have any intention to transition. I might get a chest reduction done (I'm exceedingly small chested anyway, so it's not an urgent feeling), but that's it. I have no intention to take hormones, or have bottom reassignment surgery done. I want to be recognized as masculine. I used to pass as a boy very well without trying, even when I was dressed as a girl. It hasn't happened in awhile and I miss it. I found this definition on Wikipedia: Boi may also refer to a female-bodied person, who generally does not identify as, or only partially identifies as feminine, female, a girl, or a woman. Some bois are transsexual, transgendered, or intersexed. Some "bois" identify as one or more of these, but they almost always identify as lesbians, dykes, or queers. Many are also genderqueer or practice genderfuck. Bois may prefer a range of pronouns, including "he", "she", or non-binary and gender-neutral pronouns such as "they", "co", "hir", "sie", "zie", and "ey".The term has found increasing usage in the larger LGBT culture. It just struck me as right. I would still prefer to be referred to as "he", but it's so hard to make people understand that without the whole "complete transition" piece. Even people who understand and accept the idea of transsexuals seem to have a binary view. That either, you are a boy or you are a girl. You can't be physically a girl, want to be recognized as a boy but not want to physically be a boy. As if those two things, the physical and the recognition need to be the same. Another thing that prompts me to feel like this is when I think of myself, look at my body, as if it's a girl's, it seems so ... weird. Things are wrong with that idea, with it. If I look at my body as a boy's, even with breasts and hips, I'm happy with it.
I've always heard of 'boi' to be used for a submissive, young, often bitchy gay boy. Based on this alternate definition you've provided, I guess it could work to describe you, though again I'm not sure how many people would know what you mean if you told them you are a 'boi'. And I'm not sure I get the difference in nuance between this and identifying as genderqueer? Is 'boi' intended to be it's own complete distinct identity, or is it just a nickname for a certain type of genderqueer person?
I honestly haven't really come across that term before. If it feels right, go with it. There are probably some others that describe a male-spectrum-but-not-binary identity. I can think of transmasculine, and there are probably others. Just a point of interest, though, if you would like people to call you 'he', isn't that part of transition?
I'm quite shocked at how much I relate to this. Almost all of it, I can't remember what I played with as a child (I have a horrible LTM) and I don't mind my body looking female/male, but I like the fact of being identified as a boy, I get recognised as a boy quite often, I'm not bothered about taking hormones etc as well. I just call myself genderqueer, seems like the closest definition of myself; I'm a biological girl who dresses and acts like a boy! Gonna keep track of this topic myself I think.
This was one of the definitions for it as well. It has several definitions on Wiki under the "lesbian slang" page for it. Genderqueer, as I understand it, is the catch all term for anything so has a broad meaning. Sorry, when I talk about transition, I meant physical, not social. I have no interest in hormones or gender confirming surgeries. Though I suppose, I can't say I have no interest whatsoever as breast reduction is something I'm thinking about. ---------- Post added 24th May 2013 at 11:29 PM ---------- Do you feel strange being referred to as a girl, too?
Ah, sorry. Transition, for me, was when I took on a new name and changed my pronouns. I've since taken hormones, and I'll soon get top surgery, and while I suppose technically they are part of a medical transition, they don't change my role in society. If the question is directed towards me, that hasn't happened in about two years so I can't really answer it in the present. When it did happen, yes, it felt very strange. The best way I can describe it is as if I had been forced into someone else's life, and no one could ever see or know me. And once I started transitioning, and I was referred to as a girl, it felt like people were intentionally and callously denying the most fundamental part of my identity. Which, in retrospect, was precisely what they were doing.
I'm the same as Rakkaus. I've only ever heard it as a lesbian label, not a gender label. But if that's how you feel and how you wanna call yourself, go ahead and use it. Tho you might have to explain it to some people. Another label you might want to look into is demigirl. It sounds similar to how you described yourself feeling.
This is why I prefer "Genderbender", it kind of describes it a little better (or at least in my case!). You bend around genders. :lol: I also tried researching demigirls, but I couldn't find much.
Yeah, it's not one of the most popular labels. But from what I understand, it's described like this: Can be used to describe either someone assigned female at birth who feels but the barest association with that identification, though not a significant enough dissociation to create real physical discomfort or dysphoria, or someone assigned male at birth who is transfeminine but not wholly binary-identified, so that they feel more strongly associated with “female” than “male,” socially or physically, but not strongly enough to justify an absolute self-identification as “woman.” So to me, it's anyone born female, but doesn't really feel female, for the most part. But at the same time, isn't completely hateful of their bodies, so they don't want to do the whole transition thing. That's how I think of demigirl, anyway. There's also transmasculine too.
I know this is an old thread, but I have heard the term demiboy/demiguy used to describe people who feel partially but not entirely male. Could be relevant to you.
