About to come out to my Brother... Strategies?

Sadly I think my friend's story will be like that.
He disappeared for a few weeks and then told me that he'll get baptized. In the baptism he told me he had a lot of things to tell me... I was SO SURE he had disappeared because he decided to come out to his family (he had finally admiting "he felt identified with the Bi Coming Out"... he's gay, though, not bi) and I thought they made a big deal about it therefore the disappearance. Boy, was I wrong.

He was telling me how, from the Christian point of view, homosexuality is caused by demons possessing people. (-_-") I know he doesn't believe that. He's a very accepting person, not quite aware of some things, but accepting. He's always been pro-LGBT rights... but I guess he just cannot be gay. It's OK for others... but just not for himself.

So, yeah... But, eventually it will catch up.
Personally I'm very respectful. If he tells me he's straight, then for the record he's straight to me.
Oh, well...

 

Well I don’t really want to hijack your thread with my issues… but since you asked lol…
For me it was really never about coming out to myself. I knew I liked both sexes in a sexual way from the time I was very young. I began having sexual relations with boys and girls when I was young and during this time of my life it was near a 50/50 split of what gender I would get crushes on. So when I was young, though I didn’t broadcast my bisexuality to others, I didn’t feel guilty about it either. But when I hit my teens I became more shameful of it and started to get depressed and suicidal over it. So it wasn't until years later for me to again accept myself for who I am without feeling guilty and shameful for it. But even still I’ve been in this stage for a long time now of being accepting of myself but not wanting to let others know.

To your question "what made you realize you were Bi rather than Gay"

Well I sort of just wrote that above but ya basically I know I’m bi instead of gay because I’ve had crushes on both sexes and have had sex and enjoyed the sex with both sexes up until now (32yo) so far. From what I understand gay people have no interest (sexually) in girls at all… However with that said the older I get the more it seems I’m into guys more than girls though that might have something to do with the fact it’s been a long time since I’ve been with a guy…

I’ve noticed you mention a few times how bisexuality seems to be rare… I’ve always had the belief that very few people are actually 100% straight or gay but rather are somewhere along the continuum. I personally feel that most people fit somewhere in between this even if that means someone is 98% straight and 2% gay. However you may be more on the right track with bisexuality being rare if you mean fewer people fall into the 40-60% range… Though I may be completely wrong on this…
And I agree! I don’t know how people could say we don’t exist! Lol

As for my parents, No I don’t live with them. My mom and step dad live in another town not too far from where I live but they’re the ones I spend all the holidays with. My real dad actually lives in the same apartments as me and usually stops by daily to say hey. Out of the three it’s my step dad who I’m worried the most about. At family get togethers somehow it comes up and he always voices his strong opposition towards homosexuality in which conversations I’ve always steered very clear of with him. But to answer your question, coming out to my parents is more for me. I feel my mom and real dad both know to a degree but are in denial… Like The Queen Bee mention

I think quite a few people that will find out will be like “ha I always had a feeling" lol.

At this time I’m not dating anyone but when I do decide to date a guy it’s going to come up and I’m just tired of hiding this part of me. Though at this moment I’m still not 100% sure whether I’m going to start to date before or after I tell my parents. But the issue for me is really not just my parents but just for everyone who “thinks” they know me. I feel though it may pose challenges, being open about my sexuality to everyone would allow me to rid myself of the burden I’ve carried all these years of feeling like I need to keep it to myself. Even if that means dealing with negative reactions from certain others.

So we may not be exactly in the same boat here as far as sexual experience goes and some other things but we very much are alike in our coming out desire. Though my coming out has been at a snails pace in that I’ve told 5 people in the last 5 years, it hasn’t been until this last month that I’ve become obsessed with becoming fully open. Of course the 5 people I have told I knew for sure would support me. The hard part is telling the ones you know that might not...

Again great on you for the progress you’ve been making. Hope it liberates you the way you’re hoping it does…

 

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