Small Victories

You look great, especially on the right. I love your hair! And your outfit and accessories are all nice and subtle but pretty.

 

thanks colored my hair a couple weeks now i think it looks better now. still working on the length want it longer than shoulder length. the pic on the right was the new top i bought with my wife yesterday. i think it looks amazing myself.
thanks rickystarr for the comment

 

I wore a bra and clothing exclusively from the boys department today and went out with my mom to help her shop! I really felt like a boy! Also, my Genderfluid pride flag hat came!!! It wasn't supposed to come for, like, another week!

 

I talked to the phone with a friend I'm out to, even if I was worried to wierd him out because of my voice... referring to myself with female pronouns
I just did it, and my friend was super supportive! I was kinda uncomfortable at first, but I explained to him, my issues, and than I could talk freely and with a higher pitch, being more comfortable with ^^

Now I feel good

 

so I mentioned in a local, private, facebook group im in for Trans people that im looking for a wig. my friend said there's a place around the corner from them and that they'd check it out for me. they went in and started making inquiries and used feminine pronouns for me, because they think of me in feminine terms...... wow. they told me about it later because they felt bad that they didn't check that with me first but I felt that it was a real complement because they could see beyond the "male" shell I have.

 

I left my house at 6:13 this morning, just to beat traffic in a 23 mile distance. I made it to work an hour early, so I'm happy about that.

 

That's awesome. My voice was the absolute hardest part. I was the most self conscience about it because of the way I hear my voice (that whole listening to yourself on a tape recorder).

 

My mom made me take a shower last night because...well, when I get smelly, I get SMELLY. And after I was done, it was something like 10:00 PM, my brother was finally home from his class but he's a huge germaphobe and he hates touching me when I'm dirty. So when he didn't want to touch me, my mom said, "No, she- uh, they are squeaky clean!" She used my pronouns!! I prefer male pronouns but I really don't care. Anything other than female pronouns is good in my book!

 

That's so cool!! (*hug*)

 

I love when my dad starts texts with hello son how are you.

 

:')

 

I had an old friend over last night and we hung out with my fiancee and had a great time. They were making great efforts to use my name and pronouns. Seems like my fiancee only wants to do it if other people are doing it, so this helped. Maybe it's starting to stick.

 

I just took one of dads old shirts out of the laundry to sleep in and when I looked in the mirror I felt really euphoric for whatever reason. It was warm too.
A nice end to a bad day.

 

Couple of awesome things!

Went shopping yesterday and picked out a bunch of new men's clothing to go back to uni with. I'm steadily losing weight as well so I'm passing more and more as my hips get smaller. My mom was standing just outside the fitting room cubicle, and she was giving me a lot of honest advice on how the clothes made me look - she also kept phrasing things as "this would be really good on you when you get to X stage" and it just felt really good that she was acknowledging that I'm in transition. I also remembered last minute about a dressing gown and without missing a beat my mom said "oh, they don't do men's here, only women's. Let's go to another store". Barely a month ago she would have taken me to the women's section then huffed when I said I didn't want a women's gown. She's become so suddenly supportive and I'm so appreciative of it. She's also stopped using daughter and other female-gendered words for me, and tries to avoid words entirely or use gender-neutral variants (like child or "my youngest"). She still uses female pronouns sometimes, and obviously I'd prefer male everything, but the progress away from female just makes me so happy and I don't care what they use so long as it isn't female.

Also I was trying to tell a cosplayer encouraging binding with ace bandages how dangerous and deadly it is (they were insisting that "binding loosely" was okay and any type of binding was dangerous anyway so why not use the cheap option), I threw logic and all the facts of how proper binders are immensely low-risk if you bind correctly, and she finally exploded at me and said "why do you even care, you don't even have breasts!" So I guess I passed really well as male. :lol: I wasn't even binding at the time, and this girl didn't know I was trans since I met her that day. I just hope she listened in the end, and that she doesn't keep encouraging something so dangerous...

 

Somewhat TMI below.

I bought a couple of sex toys that chase ross has endorsed for ftms on his channel including the brosleeve which I've heard may or may not work if you are pre-T. Figure it's worth a shot, and if it doesn't work, I'll always still have it when I start T. It was only like twelve bucks. Also got the Fuze strapon thing which looks real and rubs against you and can be used for jacking off according to chase. I've never felt comfortable buying or even owning a sex toy before. I think it is because they tend to be marketed to women. So I'm pretty excited to get those. I may or may not be comfortable using it with my fiancee any time in the near future but we'll see. I don't really have bottom dysphoria, but I do have sex dyphoria in general and it would be nice to at least be able to masturbate in a way that feels more masculine. I've been trying to improvise and have had mixed results lol. Once I get them I might post a review.

 

I ditched some toxic friends today. They don't know it yet. They may never know it because I won't be talking to them to tell them. I feel lighter and happier as a result.

 

good for you. reducing toxicity and negativity in your life is one of the best things you can do for you.

 

Ditto on what looking for me said. You (not to your fault) can fail to see the total effect when the life is sucked out of you just a little bit each day.

That feeling is so uplifting because there isn't a vampiric force eating at your happiness anymore.

Ride that wave, Amy.

 

Thanks! The end result is I finally got to see the wedding photos of ANOTHER friend who knows them and is way more supportive and a friend now than they ever were. So it's nothing but win.