It seems like there no comfortable bisexuals on this site?

Not a problem!

Funny thing is that I think that sorting out my sexuality, in terms of thoughts and process, made it easier to realize my gender identity many years later. It's like it primed me for being different...

 

I class myself as bisexual. Always will and am comfortable with it. Having to continually explain it just because I've been in a relationship with a guy for 7 years is a bit annoying though..

 

I actually finally accepted myself as being bisexual and have a preference for women.. It was a LONG road starting in 2014 going back and forth.. Now I just gotta get used to that part of myself. Kind of comfortable but at the same time I am worried about what others think of me especially lesbian women cuz I know sometimes they do not like is bisexuals..

 

Nah, I'm super comfortable with being bisexual. There are times where I'll question myself, or wonder, but ultimately I know who I am so it never becomes a problem. However, I am not comfortable being out as bisexual(yet.) Besides that though, I'm perfectly content with my orientation.

This is not to say I was always like this, and a few years ago I was a wreck over questioning my sexuality; and it seems like many who question if they're bi end up using this forum to ask what others think.

 

That may be how you feel, but remember you can't control what others are going to think. If they look down on bisexuals or insist that bisexuals don't exist, they are not people that you need to know.

 

Welp, i'm bisexual and I love it

If anyone needs help about being bi, coming out, just PM me

 

I'm not sure about my sexual orientation partly because of the difficulties of being bisexual. I came out to my wife as bisexual two years into our marriage and she passed away just days after our 14th wedding anniversary. And I started having sex with men about five years into our marriage. I can still remember the excitement of having sex with my wife just hours after having had casual sex with men and it felt so good and so right. But only for me. And definitely not for my wife. Recently I decided to identify as gay because I don't want to put another woman through the things I put my wife through. I love sex with men and women and I couldn't imagine giving up sex with men to be in a monogamous relationship with a woman. It feels like a part of me is not alive when I can't have sex with men. I've recently met a guy and it might just turn into my first serious relationship with another man (up to now it's been all casual sex with men) and I'm happy to be exclusively gay from no on. Or at least I think I am. Ideally I would love to have two special people in my life: a man and a woman. But I have no idea how to make this happen if a way which would be honest and respectful for both the man and the woman. I know I'm focusing on the sexual aspect of sexual identity, but this is the defining aspect of my sexuality for me.

 

Doncha call me a welp, sonny! And of course you love being bisexual! We have always had and will always have the best cookies!

 

I came to this site trying to figure out if what I felt was real or not. not knowing if I was Bi or just straight. Now I'm doubting if I'm Bi or just a Lesbian? I don't know if I'll ever really feel comfortable with one of those labels and I still fear waking up one day and realising this was one big mistake and I don't belong here

 

Sorting out ones sexuality is not the work of a minute. I think too many try to rush the process, and it is a process. What we feel in the heat of the moment or shorty after, may not be correct or may be exaggerated. It takes a while to absorb and understand what was experienced. After that, the next thing to think about is do you want to do it (whatever the experience was) again. It is very similar to asking someone about their vacation: Would you go to that place again?

Think about it clearly and listen to your answer...

 

I think most of us have questioned whether or not our feelings are real. Admitting that you were wrong and having to come out again as straight would be awful. We are all here because we are or were discovering our sexual orientation and/or gender identity. Everybody who is questioning belongs here. I don't think it's helpful to identify with a label until you're comfortable with it, but if having one makes you feel better, 'questioning' is a perfectly fine label. It can take time, but you will find the answer someday, and whatever that answer is, know that you are awesome no matter who or what you are (*hug*)

 

Thanks BostonStranger for making me feel like I belong! I feel like I do really know that all these overwhelming feelings are real and that I'm queer (whaterver that might be), I think it's actually really exciting! but now I have to get past that small part of me telling me I'm imagining this

 

You're very welcome LunaMar

Being different and discovering your sexuality sure is exciting! It's tough sometimes, but I'm glad and proud to be different. My doubts came from some internalised biphobia. In our heteronormative society, we grow up with the notion that LGBTQ+ people are not 'normal'. Discovering that you're different and thus 'not normal' is scary and questioning it is only logical, but it's the first step in your journey of self discovery and acceptance

 

Unfortunately we use the word Normal in a lot of ways that we shouldn't. If you exclude the technically oriented definitions, such as perpendicularity, you are left with things about what Usually Happens. However, what Usually Happens do not exclude other things from happening. Basically it just speaks to frequency.

So, when heterosexual, cisgender people call themselves Normal, all they can really say is that this condition occurs most often. It doesn't not exclude other possibilities. Depending upon what you read, the LGB population is between 5% and 10%. With a US population of 322,000,000 that means 16,000,000 to 32,000,000 people. The Trans population is estimated at .6% which translates to slightly under 2,000,000 people.

To me, numbers that substantial suggests that there are other ways of being besides heterosexual and cisgender.

 

I am closest to bi, and I'm not comfortable with that. I would rather be just a lesbian. But I can't deny my past relationships with men, nor my previous attractions.

I think, like someone else said, if I can be with both, then I can "choose", right? So why this big push to come out if I could choose to just act straight? At least that's what goes through my mind.

 

To quote Rachel Maddow:

"No one can insult you by telling you what you just told them."

 

I feel like you. Yesterday I felt like I just wanted to erase myself from the face of the earth. It was my worst day in a couple of months. I have the type of personality that finds it difficult to deal with risk or uncertainty. I go from thinking I'm lesbian to bisexual to straight but just going through a phase - all within a day sometimes...worrying that others will perceive me as nutty or making it up. Feeling like I belong to neither world. To make it worse, I look completely straight. In short I'm finding it difficult to accept myself without having a clear label.

 

I'm comfortable with my sexuality as long as I only date other bisexuals.