Gay guys pulling straight guys...easy?

It's kind of like Robin Williams in the Bird Cage trying it with a woman once just to find out what all the straight guys are raving about. I think it's liquor and curiosity that makes them try it.

 

... It's just logic

 

While there are different ways to see it, I think it is very unfair/weak argument for sexuality being fluid(general statement). People have done ridiculous stuff while wasted such as trying to have sex with animals, for example: would you consider that person to be someone potentially into bestiality off of that situation(when they would NOT have done it under 'normal' circumstances; as in without 'outside' influences)?

I also think the prison argument is pretty weak too, with humans(generally) being sexual beings. How many of those guys actually can say they can 'be attracted to' other men(specifically the ones who identify as completely straight)?

I can go out right now and sleep with all the women I felt the need to if I really wanted to. Does that mean I'm not gay? No it doesn't. It's more than that, despite the fact I am not wired to that thinking anyways.

Why has the 'sexuality isn't all about sex' statement all of a sudden been dropped from some people's thoughts?

 

I agree with you he sounds like a bi or somebody in the closet. After experiencing sex with a bi I realized the difference bhetween straight sex and gay sex. I assume gay guys to be like bi ones in bed. In the bedroom is where the bottom line is! Telling this to a bunch of gays or bi guys will not likely make too much sence because I have not been surgically altered yet. Otherwise I have no way to tell the difference. You just can't tell by how masculine he is or straight acting or any of that nonsense. A straight man knows how to make love to a woman, whereas it's different with a bi guy and I assume a gay guy would be like a bi guy. I do not see why anyone would push themselves on someone not attracted to their gender? This whole thing makes no sense to me. I make my choices from the men who are attracted to me. After all if I pushed myself on a man not sexually attracted to me the sex would be one sided and suck! I just don't see where it would be enjoyable like sex was with my bisexual boyfriend in the past. He just assumed my body functioned like his which made it unpleasant for me because he was turned on by John and expected gay sex with John instead of straight sex with June which is the only possibility with me. I hope that makes sense because otherwise maybe the straight guy would let the gay guy blow him? I just could not see it being a good experience for either party because neither could give the other what they wanted, maybe this is what I'm trying to say. But people will do what they want when it's really their business. June

 

I'm not sure why everyone seems to think being under the influence of alcohol would lead someone to do something they would never otherwise dream of doing, since alcohol merely lowers inhibitions. In Mexico, there's a saying that implies drunks and children are known for telling the truth, again hinting that alcohol would make it more likely for someone to do something without second thoughts, doubts, etc.

Unless you're so plastered to even know what's going on around you, and someone else forces you to have sex with them (that would be rape), you're still you, and making choices that, on some level, you'd be capable of sober. The guys who have sex with someone outside of their orientation could be doing it for any number of reasons that would otherwise be taboo in society: curiosity, sexual frustration, wanting to tell about it afterwards.

Again, I'm NOT arguing that a straight or gay person who sleeps with someone outside of their orientation being bisexual, but that the whole "I could never..." mindset a lot of people have when it comes to something they've never even thought of simplifies everything down to a fundamental level. Nothing I've done while tipsy or drunk was something I wouldn't otherwise, it just removed a lot of my anxieties that would otherwise stop me from doing so.

 

@gravechild

I'm not saying they couldn't be bisexual or anything either but the outcome isn't 100% for everyone and everyone has different tolerance levels, etc. as pointed out.

How can you imply that someone couldn't be influenced into doing something they wouldn't otherwise? That saying, while it holds truth with individuals, doesn't mean it implies to everyone(the truth thing).

The never thing is also under 'normal' circumstances for many. People say they could never kill anyone(and be truthful) but have under influence. I guess it depends on what is truthfully normal to them(as in deep down).

By the way, the whole post was not directed at you, but a general thought to other things in this thread as well.

 

I just don't buy the whole "blame it on the alcohol" catchphrase, like having one shot is going to result in some spontaneous Jekyll Hyde transformation and make you do things otherwise impossible. Some people will use their intoxication as an excuse to do something they wouldn't be able to get away with otherwise, and some people might say I go from being a nice guy to an "asshole", but if they knew me better, they'd simply realize that I get more comfortable and treat them less like a stranger and more like someone closer to me.

And my "never" example was used to highlight biases people have that might otherwise not exist in a vacuum. Just because you're a gay man doesn't mean you have to comment how disgusting vaginas are; just because you're a straight man doesn't mean you have to show your disapproval of gay men and constantly re-affirm your heterosexuality. These are societal; just because you're not attracted to someone/something doesn't mean they have to anger or disgust you.

Usually, it's with a friend or someone otherwise close to them that they trust, so it's not like these guys are going out of their way to find a woman. It's a lot more convenient and "safe" for them, a lot like when one marries their best friend after many years of growing close and letting something develop, even if it's not necessarily the same that would develop between a heterosexual couple in different circumstances.

 

I didn't mean to sound like I was snapping at you.

I wasn't saying it should give you a free pass to do whatever; Was more so just pointing out that, depending on things like their real level under the influence, etc., someone may end up doing something they truthfully would not do otherwise.

Going back to the thread topic a little more, some of those guys may feel safer to try things they are curious about, etc. under the disguise of being influenced(by that I mean a good level of awareness still, while appearing on a different level to others). However, some may very well be at a point(wherever that is) where they may end up doing something they'd find ridiculous(various ranges of things). That is what I meant.

Alcohol definitely isn't some get out of jail free card for everything committed under it(you know what I mean).

I know plenty of people who drink around/with others they don't usually associate with unfortunately. :l

 

Wondering about situations like one in grad school where a big friendly lug who was getting a Masters in Phys Ed or something, was buddies with many more girls than guys, really got upset when the conversation turned to anything gay themed, and once gratuitously wiped some food from the corner of my mouth after having had lunch in one of the cafeterias. I found it both laughable and inconsistent. From the comments some of the girls made, it seemed like they definitely wanted a romp with him in the sack, but I don't think he ever took any of them up on what could have been had with a snap. But maybe he's less straight than the guys we're addressing in the thread. Still, the big, goofy, big-kid type guys who are overly friendly and even slightly touchy are kind of interesting.

 

^ ...what the...?

 

To paraphrase my dad here, if I may, but in a more polite way. mmmmm-bull feces.

If a man is straight then he is straight and, as he is intoxicated, he cannot give consent and any sex that he has with a man or a woman can be classified as rape.

 

I think it depends on why he's sleeping with the guy maybe he just wanted to see what it was on the other side people get curious sometimes , or it could men he's actually gay or bisexual .

 

Sexuality is what someone is, not what someone does. And sometimes people act in a way that contradicts who they are, and that's fine. Straight men don't have to be drunk or coerced to want to sleep with other guys.

Sex with straight men, as I said before, isn't bad for either party. The difference is that instead of being a person they're sexually attracted to, you're a sex toy, or a convenience, or a novelty. If you're fine with having non-emotional mechanical sex, and if you're both capable of making an informed decision, then I don't see the problem.

 

No matter how attracted I am to a straight guy, I wouldn't ever want to sleep with him. If he's drunk, then it would be rape, and if he's sober and consents to it, he won't be enjoying it much and there's no true love involved. Only when I know both of us are going to like it would I consider sleeping with someone.

 

I think it's entirely possible to seduce a straight person to sleep with you at least. They may have their own reasons to do it, like they could be at the point in their life where they're feeling adventurous and want to experiment. And if they are indeed straight, it won't mean anything to them, it would be just an experience. Most likely it won't even go as far as a relationship and they'll go back to dating the opposite sex. Many lesbians have had sex with a guy at least once in their life, perhaps it served as an eye opener for the fact that it's women they wanted to be with.

 

Makes sense to me.

The other thing is that in some of these situations, not particularly being a consumer of alcohol, the other person may consent after having 2 drinks within an hour, and with a body type and constitution that is used to this level of consumption, they know full well what they're doing and are well below the legal limit of what would be considered inebriated. If anyone has been around someone who is flat out drunk, there is no way the sex could be any fun, unless it's a unilateral experience for you. Part of the fun is when the other person thinks it's fun, too, and they're moaning or something.

 

I'm not from the "if you think about having sex with a guy, or even try it a few times, you're not straight" school. I have no issue with straight guys wondering about it, watching some porn, or even giving it a whirl. What I have problems with is how gay/bi people process that information. It seems many people take that to mean "everybody's at least a bit bi" (which is fine I guess)...and they therefore take that to mean "everybody is fair game". In short (if you don't mind me using the male pronouns here), you technically CAN have sex with absolutely everybody - you just have to catch him at the right time, and make the right moves, and you can have sex with him. And I DON'T think that's the case. Because even if he IS bi, that doesn't mean he'll be "bi for you" - probably not now, and probably not ever. So I've seen a lot of gay guys who hover around straight guys that they've got a thing for, making sure they're available, keeping the liquor available because hey, you never know, right? And as I said earlier in the thread - why not go find a guy who actually WANTS to have sex with you, without having to wait for a green light that possibly/probably won't ever come?

That said, that's MY take. As I said, I know guys who only sleep with straights. I've even met a gay guy who claimed a 100% success rate on every straight guy he set his sights on. (But I'm not sure I believe him, and he was kind of an asshole.) It just doesn't seem like much fun from my vantage point.

Lex

 

this ^