What are you thinking?

Yes but it's often not just fixed with thinking positive. Most seriously depressed people either need some hardcore cognitive behavioral therapy or anti-depressants. It's not always a matter of being happy. Sometimes it really is a severe chemical issue in the brain. And then you have cases of severe situational depression. I suppose many cases like that (like, for instance, someone's having financial issues) could be helped with a new outlook and support but it is dismissive to tell someone grappling with either a mental illness or serious life issues to just "be positive" because that, one, it doesn't address whatever real issues they're dealing with and two, that often backfires because when you tell someone to conceal their feelings for the sake of being happy, they'll probably get even more depressed and unable to healthily cope.

 

My birthday is on Tuesday. I know everything I'm getting. My mom is not good at keeping stuff a secret.

 

Sometimes I really hate the contradiction of feeling isolated from coworkers from within my age-group, many of whom seem to hang outside of work from time-to-time, yet also doubting whether I'd actually enjoy participating in any of the things they do if ever given the opportunity. .____.

 

I feel fucking unmanly and gross right now. I'm too fat to fit into the vest I just got and I don't even know how to tie a tie and none of the tutorials online make any goddamn sense. I'm dysphoric as fuck too. I hate myself.

 

Wow, I'm surprised no one else has responded to this... I hope things in some way get better for you. Keep talking to us. (*hug*)

 

I wonder what my nose would have looked like if I never broke it? And I guess if my parents decided to fix it when it happened....I think it would have looked like my moms.

I want to fix it eventually. When I can do it on my own. My parents don't allow me or support me in my decision, wanting to pursues cosmetic surgery.

 

The tie game takes some time, but I tell you, you are going to get there. Focus on the movements, while looking away. Try to picture on your mind the movements. It's some sort of mechanical thing. Just take all the time in the world, and keep in mind teenager boys also need time before they can do it.

Well, a fat man is better than some skinny nerd looking... Boy who is on his 30s.
They never call me sir when I pass, they only call me boy or young man. You go outside with this, try to ask out any woman... They'd probably pat my head and tell me they could be my mother.

 

Okay, I think I finally got the tie game down. Ended up with what I think is a half windsor. Had to resort to YouTube and it took a couple times but it looks fairly competent.

I'm at that point in my life where I want to look like someone to take seriously, you know? But I either look like a little boy or a lesbian. I signed up for a clothing subscription service that puts you in touch with a personal designer so we're gonna see if this works.

 

Hwicce

 

Best of luck to you!

 

Who even am I? I'm just so confused at the moment, and all this pressure from others isn't helping. Am I too bland/boring? Is there such a thing? How can I be happier in general? Am I progressing a person or regressing? Why do I feel this way? I just don't know anymore. :eusa_doh:

:dry:

 

*hugs*

I wrote a message on your wall, and sure hope things look up. This has to be hard. I hope in time they come to accept you, and see their own small-mindedness in this; it's just not easy, when they've been brought up to think such things are so wrong.

You've always been a friendly, warm person, one of the few people here I ever felt OK with about being honest about my kinky interests, and who understood them...that means a lot, as most people seem to go, 'huh', or run!

And you very strong, to have survived this.

Know that you're in my thoughts,

*noses*

~H. Pup

 

Looks like I'm not going to get my tattoo tonight. My artist had to reschedule. The good news is that I get 50 dollars off of my tattoo now, so that is at least cool.

 

I love science but Earth Science bores me to death

 

There's an article on CNN about the US bombing of ISIS cash and the headline made me chuckle:

U.S. Makes a Deposit in ISIS Bank

:lol:

 

End of the week + exhaustion + buy and read Greg Rucka's Before the Awakening (a book of pre-TFA Star Wars short stories) + come out to brother = happy insanity.

 

person: tell me whats wrong
me: the problem is A
person: i dont understand
me: the problem i am having is directly related to event A
person: so your problem is B
me: okay

 

I'm glad that there's a 3 day weekend.