Have you ever heard someone say this before? I've heard this a lot. It really doesn't make much sense because: A) Straight people don't keep it to themselves. B) Someone can find out you are gay by you using the phrase "my boyfriend". Are you supposed to just never reveal your sexuality, never talk about your same-sex partner? There seem to be some people who equate "coming out" with dancing nude in a pride parade and shouting from the rooftops about your sexuality.
I hear it a lot. I think a lot of straight people do not understand it because they personally do not have to go through the situation LGBTQ people have to with coming out. Everytime I see a straight couple kissing/making out on TV or in Movies, it always makes me wonder how people would react to the same situation with a same sex couple. The same with PDAs. I've seen straight people full on french kissing passionately in public before, but whenever a gay or lesbian couple give each other a peck on the cheek, it's suddenly us pushing our sexuality on others. I for one will not listen to what straight people tell me to do when it comes to me being so open about my sexuality, because 1) it isn't their life to live, and 2) I am so open because I don't want society to become so harsh of LGBTQ people again to the point where the closet is the only option. As Harvey Milk said, coming out and being open about your sexuality is the way to change people's minds. If you want to see what it was like for gay people to "keep it to themselves", you can go back and look at the days where homosexuals were all considered paedophiles, rapists, and sex crazed people who had to have sex in shady places such as underground clubs and bathhouses.
HA! Before I came out, my dad used to love to say, "Gay men should be more like Will & less like Jack," referring to the characters from Will & Grace. He'd always complain about flamboyant gay men, but insist he had no issues with queer folks. At 13 I told him he'd just rather they be a Will so he can forget they exist easier. Of course, he's changed his mind about it now.
Yeah that doesn't really make sense for gay people to keep it to themselves. They should express their love just as much as straight people. Holding hands, kissing, hugging, and talking about your mate are normal standards. Obviously french kissing in public is rude no matter the orientation and sex well that also behind closed door for all orientations However, when people say that they are either homophobic or trying to spress their desires because "don't see, don't hear, don't tell". I remember I use to "I don't mind gay people but I don't want to be around them" I was stupid and trying to still hide away, but in the end I got out of it and I believe with support those using this as an excuse to hideout will come out. The more that come out the less homophobic the younger generations will be and then it will be seen as acceptable. My support happened to be this website and it was extremely helpful!
I feel like people who say this are kind of just ignorant. I feel like they're so immersed within their straight privilege that they don't realize that lgbtqa people wouldn't have to come out if people just treated them like everybody else.
You know, I don't have a problem keeping it to myself. It means I don't have to share my handsome men and beautiful ladies. I can get on board with this! LOL.
I'm not going to lie. I think all public displays of affection and any provocative clothing in a general area should be illegal. I think gay people and straight people should keep whatever they do behind closed curtains to themselves.
Well that's the point of this question. This isn't just about PDA and "slutty" clothing. It's about people simply revealing their sexuality. PDA is not the only way by which a person may reveal that they are gay.
Then I say no one should make their sexuality publicly known, regardless of orientation. Why bother? What good does it do? The way I see it all it does is get people hurt. Why advertise what needn't be advertised? And I didn't say "slutty" clothing, I said "provocative" clothing-- a much broader spectrum than "slutty."
Ironically, if gay guys use gender-neutral terminology to avoid "shoving it in other's faces," it becomes more awkward and sticks out like a sore thumb (at least in the United States/English):
^Agreed. That's why making extra effort to hide it is absurd and unnecessary. Again, "advertising" is not the same as "revealing". Saying something as simple as "my boyfriend" reveals that you're attracted to the same sex. Are you suggesting that gay people should never talk about their partners or people they're interested in? You might not talk about it with random strangers, but it's still something that could come up. "Yeah, my wife and I..." It's something people say in casual conversation. So the same could happen with a same-sex partner. Ah, I see. So even wearing a T-shirt could potentially be illegal under your standards. Even Singapore would be given a run for their money.
Never been a fan of public displays of affection, but double standards much? I can't tell you how many lines I've been stuck in where the couple in front of me is totally oblivious to the world around them. I see it way more with heterosexuals, anyway, and aside from gay bars and some very liberal parts of town, you'd be hard pressed to see gay people "shoving it".
I can't even begin to sum up everything wrong with what you just said. Look, you're 15 and I'm 27-- and while I may not be very old, I've been hospitalized involuntarily three times and seen over one hundred psychotherapists in my life-- I've seen the dark underbelly of the American Psychological Association and I've been to Hell and back more than a couple times. You're 15, you're still in high school, you were born into a world where everything was taken away our generations in a single, swift act of utter horror that's catapulted the entire planet into at least a hundred years of emotional and economical turmoil. You were in diapers the day I and everyone else my age watched in horror as the towers came falling down. All I'm saying is I think sexuality should be like religion-- if it's something you're deeply seated with, something that helps you cope with the fact that every passing day is identical to the last and helps you sleep at night then that's great. But I'm not about to go chasing people with a gay pride parade or handing out tickets for God. Why say "boyfriend?" Or "wife?" Or whatever? Why not just say "someone I know." It's not a matter of whether or not you have to keep it to yourself, the matter at hand is that people should keep it to themselves.
I encounter it in games especially, my guild tag in an MMORPG I play is [LGBT] and my icon in another game is a rainbow flag added by the devs specifically to show LGBT support and I often get comments about it in PvP matches, either the general homophobic/transphobic stuff or being told that I should keep it to myself and that it "doesn't belong in video games" I like showing off that I'm trans and gay tbh ;// it's stuff I like about myself, and I wouldn't have found the great friends I have without looking for LGBT-specific groups/guilds.
Okay then. Ignoring the massive non sequitur you just spewed at me, as incoherent as your ideas may seem to me, they are not hypocritical as you are applying them equally to both straight and LGBT people and that was the main point of this thread, the double standard. If LGBT people are subject to this then so should straight people be.
No, gay people should not keep it to themselves. Queer visibility is crucial. It saves lives. While I don't have a partner to hold hands with in public, I have a small, yet rather visible, rainbow flag on my bag. Why? Because I know that when I was in the closet, seeing that on someone else's bag would have meant the world to me. I also 'like' shoving it in people's faces. People around here generally don't say outright homophobic things (it does happen though), but the attitude towards LGBTQ+ topics, while never explicitly said, is that it doesn't happen here. When I was in the closet, it made me feel so alone. [YOUTUBE]OXDfaLzzoo8[/YOUTUBE] This poem relates to the topic, and I think is pretty great. ETA: To clarify, if someone wishes not to make their sexuality known, that is of course absolutely okay as well.