General News Police chief commends dad who rearranged man's face for sexually abusing his son

Because we have a thing called the law.

Lets say I'm unarmed and a guy with a knife attacks me. Lets say I knock him unconscious and tie him up. I have used reasonable force as defined by the law.

If I proceed to torture or murder him whilst he is incapacitated I have probably used unreasonable force and it would be up to the police to determine whether I myself have also committed a crime. Now it may be the case that a person's level of fear for their life was so extreme (with pre-existing mental problems, eggshell skull rule kicking in) this would be deemed reasonable, however that would be for a court of law to determine.

In this particular scenario I believe the man used unreasonable force in the context of self-defence. I would state that given the extreme circumstances of the case (him apprehending a rapist, adrenaline kicking in, extreme anger etc) it would probably not be in public interest or best for justice to prosecute him for battery. This seems an exceptional case. However I think the police chiefs actions of "commending" him are wholly inappropriate, giving a very bad message to the public.

On a personal level I only agree to violence in situations of self-defence. Now the level of violence used depends entirely on what is appropriate for the circumstance.

 

No, I speaking generally to elaborate on my original post.

I completely understand having concerns for the child and the psychological results of this event. My viewpoint was that there isn't any scenario of this situation that would have left the child's unharmed on a mental level, regardless of his sexual orientation or degree of interaction. Psychologically, it is much more detrimental for a homosexual to be raped or molested by a member of the same sex than a heterosexual. Victims of coercion are far more lightly to suffering from self-loathing and longtime sexual repression because they can't rid themselves of the guilt that they allowed their own abuse to occur.

This child was never going to come out of this situation even moderately well no matter the circumstances. While the use of homophobic slurs when confronting the rapist would theoretically add more salt to the wound, we have no evidence to accept that as the case. Based on what we do know, I simply do not see the father's decision to hit the rapist a certain amount of times compared to another to have deeply worsened the child's emotional scarring.

 

If it were a female raping him instead of a male, the "don't hit girls" mentality may come into play, but I'd still say she would have deserved it from the father.

I don't really like all the supposition though. Going on what happened, I see nothing wrong except the offense itself.

 

I agree, there was no way that he was coming out of this situation unharmed. However, there was still the potential to do more harm afterward and to still harm him further in the future. It's not as if the abuse ended, and the child is out of emotional harms way. The reality is he could be entering into an even more traumatizing phase. It's not just the rape itself that matters, it's how it's handled after the fact, and that's where my emotional concern at the moment is placed.

We lack the potential to go back and change the past, but people do have influence over how things unfold in the future. So, it's my desperate hope that there are some qualified professionals intervening in this situation and making sure he is getting the counseling and assistance that he needs.

I agree with this entirely. Of course, we don't know if he's gay or not, but it's within the realm of possibility. Given that the possibility is there, though, and that this has likely outed him to his family... I really worry about how things are being handled. Unfortunately, a lot of parents aren't capable of dealing with having a gay child in the most ideal of circumstances, and these circumstances are far from ideal. You combine the rape with being outed to your family before you're ready, his very young age, the emotional difficulties surrounding both these situations and how the family manages to process and deal with it... well, it leads me to worry a great deal for this kid. That's way too much for someone of that age to process and deal with all at once.

 

Part of what bothers me isn't just how the father might have reacted had it been a female instead, but how the police chief and everyone else who is responding might have acted.

Had it been a female who had done this, and she had been beaten within an inch of her life, it's hard for me to imagine that people would be here calling for him to get the father of the year award and almost seeming gleeful at the excessive use of force. It's hard for me to imagine the police chief making the statement that he did, in fact I actually believe charges might have been pressed against him.

It disturbs me to think that while my opinion and reaction doesn't change regardless of gender, that other peoples opinions might, and I am forced to wonder why.

One possibility is that some people might think it's more acceptable to use violence against a man than a woman. That simply by being identified as a man by others it entitles you to suffer a greater amount of suffering or violence for the same offenses. This obviously has disturbing implications that range beyond this single mans crime, and in fact impacts all men. It means that, as a man, it's more acceptable for you to be assaulted (regardless of reason) than it would be if you were a female.

Another possibility is that some people might think it's worse to be raped by a man than a woman. This also has disturbing implications, and we have to ask why people feel that way. The only reasonable conclusion that I can come to is some underlying anti-gay sentiment, that it's somehow emasculating to men to be raped by another man. One of the consequences of this is that men who are raped will be less likely to report it. Another consequence of this is that women might be treated less harshly for rape than men, which I think is wrong. When I look at the crime regardless of gender I see it as equally heinous and deserving of equal punishment.

I'm not sure which it is, or whether it would be something else entirely. To be clear, though, I'm not calling any individual person out here. I'm speaking in generalities. The overwhelming opinion everywhere seems to be to high-five the dad for beating this guy within an inch of his life, but I do think that if all things about this situation were the same and we flipped the genders people would at least be more reserved in their praise of the excessive use of force.

It's the reason that I said that, while I can understand the father's reaction, and can understand his passion I can't praise what he did. I think it's undeniable that he used an excessive amount of force. Regardless of passion and situation, I don't think we should be praising that, because it sends a disturbing message. And to be clear, that's different from condemning him, which I don't think we should do either.

That's why I think the most appropriate response to this is to acknowledge that he had the right to defend his son, to subdue the criminal in question, and get help but he went over the line. However, going over the line given the circumstances is understandable. The focus should have immediately shifted to the victim, and determining what was in his best interest. Instead, people seem to have needlessly been caught up in the praising of the father for his excessive use of force, and almost in some cases (disturbingly) wishing he had gone all the way. As if it was in the best interest of an eleven year old kid to watch his father murder another guy right next to the bed where he sleeps at night.

 

It is not that I disagree with the possibilities that you have outlined in your post; it is simply that I don't believe that we have adequate information to speculate on whether further damage will come as a result of the actions of the father. His reaction to the situation would have been no less common of homophobic parents than supportive parents. I am positive that the vast majority of LGBTQ parents would not be very passive given the circumstances either. From the perspectives of LGBTQ individuals, we can theorize about how this situation could have affected the child in the case that he was LGBTQ; however, children are victimized on a daily basis and we have no tangible reason to put more weight into the possibilities of him being homosexual or the unacceptance of his family.

I don't believe that the widespread support of the fathers actions is a result of an apathetic mindset towards the care of the child, rather this is a situation in which the public has an extremely narrow view. There is nothing left for the public to do but speak on whether they agree with the known actions of the parties at hand and wish the best for the victim. The families view of the LGBTQ community, the sexuality of the victim, etc, are things that we are, and rightfully should be for the sake of the victim, entirely ignorant of. Theoretically, everything that has been speculated in this thread could possibly be a reality, but unless we have evidence to support it there isn't much of a purpose to dwell on it.

 

In theory, it does seem very simple but what you have to understand is that many abusers instill fear into their victims via threats and guilt tripping. Some will even bestow their victims with gifts to further keep them quiet. They tend to groom their victim for a period of time and will blur lines before they fully strike. These types of people will often pick careers where they will be able to interact with minors in an authoritative position.

---------- Post added 19th Jul 2014 at 06:37 PM ----------

Oh boy! If it were a female who was doing the abuse, the situation probably wouldn't have even been taken as seriously as this scenario is being taken. There are many people in this world that still believe that women can't be child molesters. They don't want to believe it. Yet, they have no problem in believing that a man is capable of that. It boggles the mind.

 

Gen -

I agree. We don't know. We don't have a lot of information to go on using the article, so all we're really left with is speculation. However, these types of cases almost always involve someone who is close to the family or the child in question. It's almost never a stranger, and certainly in this case it couldn't be a stranger as he was in the family home. This means he was either a family member, someone close to the family, or someone the boy had previously met and had allowed to enter the home. We know this was not the first time he was raped, but we don't know how long it's been going on or under what circumstances it began.

Certainly, I think it's better for him if he is straight. As you noted previously, and for all the reasons I also outlined; being gay adds many additional difficulties in this situation. There is a lot of potential to do a lot of damage, even as some people try to actively help.

 

Good job, Dad

 

Rearrange his face and then let him have the long end of a plunger without lube. Not kidding.....Don't have time for child abuse.

 

Agreed. What he did was obviously terrible and he should be punished (through the law), but I find the act of cheering on and encouraging brutal violence to be pretty disgusting. Regardless of who the victim is and what he did to "deserve" it.

 

This is what I was thinking too. I can't guarantee how I'd react in such a situation and hope I'm never presented with something similar, but I'd like to think that I'd throw the guy to the floor and restrain him in some way and let the cops take it from there. If I had to hit him to keep him down I would, but I don't think repeatedly pounding him in the face when he's already down is ok. I dunno, the whole situation is terrible and I feel horrible for the poor kid.

We have a system to punish criminals like this. When people make themselves the judge and jury what's the point of having laws? Should we let everyone decide what is the right punishment for any crime committed against them? You think someone stole your phone, track them down, beat the shit out of them and cut off their hands if you think that's the right punishment. See where this leads? It's not a society I want to live in.

 

I feel justice was served and I don't believe in mercy in cases like this, he had a choice not to touch the kid and seek help but he gave into temptations and probably would've continued. The father definitely had a reason to act the way he did.

 

Absolute sick bastard. I hope they rearrange his face AGAIN in prison.

 

With that dad by his side, Im sure he'll at least come to terms with it eventually.

 

Compassion? Are we really supposed to vilify a father for beating his child's rapist?

Sure, beating him may not have been the best idea, but if you're suggesting we berate the father's actions and weep over the rapist's beating, directly resulting from and immediately after raping a child, then perhaps you've misused the word.

 

On balance I think the father's actions were more than understandable, they were justified. But I'm more ambivalent about praising it... that course of action was only justified because it was necessary and the rapist needed to be deterred from ever doing that again. As a general rule we should not be celebrating violence. It was right, but must we really cheer him on for doing it? We can't treat this as heroics, merely as doing what was, sadly, needed at the time.

As for the rapist, rather than putting him to death or beating him up further we now need to understand what motivations and mental states drove him to this. That's an actual solution rather than eye for an eye.

 

I actually think the father was too light on the perpetrator. Had I caught someone sexually abusing a child, I would count my 12 year old nephew even. He would have six, extra .45" holes in them.