What are you thinking?

He was like a literal fighting machine. But, we’ll, he still seems formidable and in fantastic considering his age, quite a dedication!
Honestly, I can’t tell if you were overcompensating for something… But there was something alluring about those hypermasculine icons. I’ve never really been into boxing, most of my scant knowledge about it comes from my grandfather’s attempts to get me interested in that sport. (I do like to watch Lennox Lewis fights when he was younger, but mainly because I find him very attractive).
As for watching sports, well, I’ve always like cycling - used to watch Tour de France as a kid, but nowadays I’m more into track cycling and keirin. Somehow TdF just isn’t exciting anymore, with all those high-tech bikes and support teams in cars riding along. Oh, and curling! Never really understood it, until I had a chance to try it… Although it’s much less fun watching than actually playing.

What about US sports? American football is kind of like rugby on steroids, but baseball looks as foreign and indecipherable as cricket (but, well, novuss and zole probably look like mumbo-jumbo for people outside Latvia, if anyone even heard of them)

 

Well, it’s a struggle sometimes. Finding the motivation and sticking it out especially when life is busy. But its a struggle to be unhappy with what you see in the mirror too, so it’s either struggle or struggle. Not sure where I heard that before but it’s stuck with me for a lot of years.

 

Either struggle or struggle... Well said! And thanks for sharing that, it's just what I needed to hear right now

 

As much as I say my art hasn't improved, I saw my old art recently and yikes! I have made strides since then.

On an unrelated note, I am crushing so hard right now. I hope we're still on for that date.

 

I’m thinking the future is bleak and the present isn’t looking all that good either.

 

I think all it was is... I was (like yourself) in a brutal, hypermasculine envoironment... I guess as Tyson and the Rocky character were both socially awkward and quite shy (and tough as nails!) that's why I looked to them for inspiration I guess... I read a funny interview with someone, once, who put Stallone forward for the best actor Oscar after Rocky... He said, "I thought, Jeez, the way he plays that awkward character, he's the best actor I've seen since Brando so I nominated him in a heartbeat... I then saw him being interviewed and suddenly it dawned on me... he wasn't acting"!

I don't know, really. I like NFL as it's such a spectacle. It is an aggressive sport, but it's also very tactical and dramatic. I guess it's so OTT masculine, it's often like cartoon masculinity (like Wrestling), which I find easier to stomach than in more serious macho sports. And all of that testosterone is tightly kept in check by the rules and tactics... It's hard to explain, really, but if you watch a match you'll probably get caught up in the carnival atmosphere/drama! ... I occasionally watch Baseball late at night live as it's full of quirky stories and sights and good to relax to. I don't watch NHL or Basketball, though.

 

Methinks that OTT masculinity was just part of the popular culture in that time. There are whole generations that grew up watching Stallone, Schearzenegger, Norris, and other tough guys on screen.
It seemed to subside quite a bit in 2000-2010, but rising popularity of MMA has brought some of it back. In my country, it’s likely also the influence of our eastern neighbour, with their fascination of Near Eastern ideals of masculinity.
I saw wrestling a few times on TV. It’s not my cup of tea, but I can certainly understand the appeal, especially when you’re actually following it and know the stories.
Everything sport-related that starts with “National” usually seems very foreign to me, maybe because I’m literally on the eastern edge of Europe, over the ocean
Basketball, by the way, is a really big deal in Latvia. If you’re a guy, you’re pretty much expected to know all the details of every game our local teams have participated in, when it comes to championships of all kinds. When these happen, big screens are put somewhere in the city centre and people gather to watch the game outdoors, no matter the weather.

 

I think it telling, though, as a shy and sweet person myself, I only looked up to those two heros at the time. I suppose I saw myself in them. And a dream of myself being that strong, being able to stand up to the toxic bullies. Did you have any ultra masculine heroes as a teen?

I'm looking forward to the new NFL season, it starts this weekend. We can only get the Monday night games live here (for free anyway), but that's enough for me. I don't really support a team, but just enjoy watching the occasion in different cities. I've never liked wrestling, either. I guess once you know it's staged then it loses the appeal!

I'd heard that basketball was big in Eastern Europe. I would probably watch it if we could get it here, but I think it involves subscriptions to watch it. Your neighbour is a peculiar country alright! Have you been? I would like to go to SPb. If it ever calms down again.

 

By your writing, you don’t exactly come off as shy, perhaps confidently humble? But I also get a feel you’re likely pretty charming in person. What would you say?

Ah, this whole subscription mess is really annoying. Especially when you get subscription services, in which part of the content requires a yet another subscription, and then another, and ad nauseum. But local sports fans rely on national TV channels and pirated streams in the internet. (One would be hard pressed to make a local pay for some service if there’s a possibility of getting it for free, even if that requires jumping trough some hoops.)

Peculiar indeed! I haven’t been to Russia, but according to a number of people who have been, it’s a place worth seeing, as it still carries the memories of once being the capital of an empire. Things will subside, eventually, no war can go on forever.

And to answer your question about heroes, I don’t remember having any ultra masculine heroes as a teen… They just didn’t resonate with me.

 

Sorry, not with it brain wise. I meant to say I should look for something similar for Affinity 2 when I jump to it. Duh!!! Those photos are amazing in the after ones.

I'm currently addicted to Merge Gardens and a few others on my phone, but I won't be playing them as much after today and tomorrow. School starts on Wednesday, and our son is gearing up for it. I'm trying to work and he's talking my ear off. Games are not as hard to lose your place in as something like writing is...

Yes, gameplay and such make a game great. Not the graphics. Spouse loves their NES, and SNES games to this day, thirty odd years after they came out. I love watching them play the games, but I'm not great at them at all. I have poor fine motor control due to nerve damage from carpal tunnel syndrome - a hazard in my career. Spouse has better control so they're the ones playing the games while I watch. It's fun and passes the time. Although we haven't done that much lately due to Spouse working so much as of late. Maybe later this year.

No, the chores never end. I'm staring at a pile of dishes and wondering how fast I can do them, and thinking that I should prep lunches for myself for Wednesday and Friday, which will be the two days I'll be (hopefully) writing this week. That's if the brain computes much other than "it should be illegal to be up at this time in the morning..." or "need coffee"...

My life does make perfect sense now... Why I always felt the need to look at other women as well as men, and I didn't mind seeing naked women like some of my friends did. It also explains why people sensed I wouldn't judge them and I was a safe person to come out to. I just wish others were comfortable letting us in the community be ourselves instead of making us feel like we're not welcome if we're not *just like them*, you know? My mom especially. Alas... But as long as I can hang out in here and be myself with certain people like my spouse and two of my best friends, I'll be okay hiding.

Hopefully you had a great long weekend too.

 

Thank you Keller. Everyone is different, though, I guess in the real world than online! I've always been quiet and introverted. I tend to see that as another huge awakening inside of me, accepting it instead of fighting it. It's little different to sexuality is it? You're just in denial about your shyness. The reason why I thought it was curious, about Rocky and Tyson, is even as a teen I was looking up to people who were "out" as sensitive/shy people I guess!

It's the same here in Britain. Many here, now, though, hate everything related to the Empire. (Though modern times are awakening, also, the opposite in many too.) I do love Victorian history, it was an amazing period of invention and discovery. I guess we're in similar times too, now, with first the WWW and now AI. Who knows where it will all lead?

 

Yeah, it's a fantastic tool, it's usually the first thing I go to when I want to give a photo some instant sparkle. I've no idea if anything similar is available for Affinity, though.

I don't know any mobile games I'm afraid, other than Angry Birds (which just annoyed the heck me when I tried it lol!) ... I tend to like life sims/RPG's most, but am currently learning Legend Bowl as it's like playing Madden from the Snes era. It's funny how many popular indie games, nowadays (Stardew, Octopath, Vampire Survivors, Hollow Knight, Minecraft etc.) have either Snes level or very simplistic graphics. It just proves that storytelling and innovative gameplay can compete with million dollar graphics, special effects and Hollywood level marketing.

The chores don't ever end. Even if your dog has the runs and you're up through the night 6 times! Well, he seems to be improving, slowly, thankfully. I dearly hope so as I don't think I can take another night of that!

 

Why do I mentally undress every attractive woman I meet, yet I am so picky with men?

 

We all want to see/find similar people, I guess it's just a part of human nature. That's not to say that in the times when Stalone and Tyson were in their prime, being open about being sensitive was very courageous for a man - at least that's how it was in this part of Europe, but I suppose it was a similar situation elsewhere, too. Also, I recall reading a story when he hired a gardner that tried to overcharge him for mowing the lawns, and Tyson called his trainer and asked for help, because he couldn't deal with the situation himself. Not sure how true is that story, but it's very relatable and gives an interesting perspective on his personality and how one can be dauntless in one area, yet completely otherwise in another.

You have an interesting perspective, honestly... Never really thought about shyness that way, but it makes so much sense when you think about it. I'm a rather shy person myself, outside the internet; while it will not seem so if you meet me in a professional capacity; but outside of it, it's clearly visible. I've never really denied it, but I sort of learned to act as if I'm not shy at all, albeit a keen eye might notice it's an act, that has happened more than once.

I want to think it will lead us into a better future, but there's just not enough optimism to think that, as with many a great idea, humanity will not it to the absurd... But afterwards? Maybe there will be a brighter future. If we survive.

 

Well, I don't know, but according to my wife it might be because "there's just so much variation in the female body, each woman can be so different in her beauty, it's amazing. While most good-looking guy's bodies look pretty much the same." That's how she described it when I asked her a smilar question, seeing her looking at photos of scantly-clad models on Instagram. (And, she's pretty much cis and straight.)

 

I accidentally left my window open until midnight and now I’m worried about all the bugs that could of gotten in and now have added nocturnal bugs to the list. I did tape a net over the part of my window that opens but parts keep coming loose and something will get through. When the sun shines a HUGE web covers the entirety of my window and I have had days where I look out my window and it’s a spider convention and I don’t want any of those 12 spiders in my room.

 

I'll have to ask around, I'm on the Affinity boards and someone may know something there.

I'm not a SIMS person at all. We had an option of using it for thinking outside of the box in the course I took during the spring semester (updating my computer skills) and it annoyed me so much I decided to do the Photoshop stuff instead during that part of the semester, which was another optional part of the curriculum. Yeah, I've seen how some games have ultra simple graphics and how easy they are to appeal to others out there like my spouse.

Goodness, I remember those days, while we still had a dog. He's gone a long time now and we didn't adopt another one. Besides, our cat is pretty picky and hates other animals, she loves only humans.

On another note, we're watching TS (soon to be hurricane) Lee. The models are showing it'll be a major hurricane by the weekend and may swing up this way. Atlantic Canada is still recovering from Fiona which hit last year. We didn't get a lot out of it, just a bit of wind and rain, but the eastern part of this end of Canada was walloped, hard. I hope this doesn't turn into a repeat of Dorian in 2019. We lost our power for an entire week, which was not fun.