I am having a bad day. I'm just angry. I'm angry at the Supreme Court. We all know who they're coming for next. I sure do have great timing for coming out. I am angry at my daughter for choosing to go hang out with friends rather than take me out for a make-up Father's Day dinner, because my Father's Day sucked. I'm angry at my soon to be ex wife (I don't know what to call her) who has gone from let's figure out how we can cohabitate and remain friends on Wednesday to oh, by the way, I got pre-approved for a mortgage and am starting to look for house. I'm angry that I didn't see that one coming when I should have. I'm angry that I can't call up a friend and say let's do something because well, I don't have any friends. And I'm angry that all of this is making me feel like a old, useless, defective, unwanted, waste of skin that no one will ever want. Rant over.
apollo.....annnnnd that's one of the reasons that Empty Closets is here...to let you rant when you need to, where people will understand at least a little of why you are ranting! So sorry about Father's day! Here let me send you a Father's Day hug ***HUG*** I can't do much about the dinner, but you have my permission to take yourself out for dinner and a movie just for fun! Dude...you're 48 years old...you are not any of those things you said! Heck, I'm 71 and I'm still having a good time (most of the time, sometimes my back hurts too much ) So pick up yourself and since your wife is obviously going to go bye-bye, why not start checking out any local gay establishments, organizations, etc., like a local LGBT Support Organization that might have info on group activities. You have a lot of life yet in front of you, so go for it! .....David
(*hug*) When was the last time that you did something just for yourself? Something that allows you to take a break from life and you can feel your inner-self relaxing and being okay? If something doesn't work out, it is okay to give yourself the permission to do something you enjoy, even if it is something you do by yourself. Now that you have written out your frustrations, disappointments try to pursue something that allows you to remind yourself that you are worthy of belonging and that things are going to be okay (even if it doesn't seem to be at the moment). Remember that you have done things and want to continue doing things to be yourself. To live your life. Remember how proud you are of your accomplishments so far. I believe that things happen for a reason. Every time something doesn't work out the way I thought or hopped it would, and after a while, I always have found that things ended up being better and I was in a better place.
That's the way things happened for me. I'm sorry to hear about your Fathers Day and your ex, but these things can possibly open other doors to you. If you need to talk, feel free to message me or others. My best wishes to you.
I'm sorry things haven't been going so well. When it rains, it pours, eh? Everyone's right: you need to do something nice for yourself, something that makes you happy and instills a sense of peace, accomplishment, or whatever it is you need to feel right now. Your soon-to-be-ex has thrown you for a loop, but getting pre-approved for a mortgage doesn't mean that she's going to find a house right away (the economy is nuts right now). So with any luck, you have time to start making plans regarding living arrangements. That would be my primary focus, were I you. The rest--like your relationship with your daughter--will fall into place. As for the Supreme Court...well, that's a fight for another day. Focus on you and your personal needs right now. That's all you can do. <3
Hugs for you Apollo. You can always message me to talk about anything. Treat yourself to a spa day. I do . Mani and pedi facial . I come out of there feling great.
